The official 'how long can it take to say nothing' thread

[DrZuess1979 the 2nd]

Boring!!!

[ooohTerryHurlock]

Boring!!!

 

Can nothing be boring??

[Polaroid Saint]

a single tone, once emitted, from any source, will at some point break down. this discord will resonant on several other progressively decaying tones until one could initially assume that there was no tone, or sound, at all. However it would be incorrect to say there was no sound, merely the inability of the observer to detect that particluar frequency/time signature.

 

Given that all mass is energy vibrating at varying frequencies, one could adequately conclude that in even in a seeming state of 'nothing' there is in fact an imperceptible 'something' allowing a 'space' in which the (perceived) 'nothing' can exist.

[Viking Warrior]

Surely this thread is too important to be taken seriously.

 

PS how many american beers does it take to get ****ed. I have had ten bottles so far and not even feeling tiddly

[dubai_phil]

Surely this thread is too important to be taken seriously.

 

PS how many american beers does it take to get ****ed. I have had ten bottles so far and not even feeling tiddly

 

That's because American Beer contains no alcohol and tastes of

 

 

Absolutely nothing

[Eyes k8]

Half a bee, philosophically

Must - ipso facto - half not be

But can a bee be said to be

An entire bee, when half the bee

Is not a bee, due to some ancient

Injury?

 

Singing: La dee dee, one two three

Eric the Half a bee

 

You've raised an important issue.

 

A bee was flying northwards when it was struck by a train coming southwards.

Half the bee was thrown away from the train and need not concern us.

The other half of the bee stuck to the front of the train and proceded with the train in a southernly direction.

clearly there was a moment at impact when the bee travelling north changed to a southerly direction and was stationary.

But that half of the stationary bee was stuck to the front of the train.

So if the half bee was stationary the train too must have been stationary.

The bee stopped the train.

Discuss.

[Pilchards]

That's because American Beer contains no alcohol and tastes of

 

 

Absolutely nothing

 

Hehe!

It's better than those where you have a half a can and you can't feel NOTHING as your legless!

[JustMike]

how on earth did this thread survive the night!! :-)

[Teddy Nutkins]

how on earth did this thread survive the night!! :-)

 

No-idea Mike, all i know is, what i do -not know, is not worth knowing.

[EastleighSoulBoy]

the more it stays the same the less it changes

 

"Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose" even?

[Pilchards]

As Friday is official takeover day I was told then Tomorrow is Friday.

 

wow it's Tomorrow then takeover day as Saturday will take it past the 21 days and next Friday will be too late as they need to start getting our season organized.

 

Should I of just said nothing?

Edited 11 June, 2009 by Pilchards

[Teddy Nutkins]

As Friday is official takeover day I was told then Tomorrow is Friday.

 

wow it's Tomorrow then takeover day as Saturday will take it past the 21 days and next Friday will be too late as they need to start getting our season organized.

 

Should I of just said nothing?

 

Yes, it would have been a lot easier reading nothing at all.

[InvictaSaint]

For evil to prosper, it is sufficient for good men to do nothing.

[eurosaint]

"I have nothing to declare except my genius"

 

Guess who said that

 

Rupert Lowe !

[InvictaSaint]

You've raised an important issue.

 

A bee was flying northwards when it was struck by a train coming southwards.

Half the bee was thrown away from the train and need not concern us.

The other half of the bee stuck to the front of the train and proceded with the train in a southernly direction.

clearly there was a moment at impact when the bee travelling north changed to a southerly direction and was stationary.

But that half of the stationary bee was stuck to the front of the train.

So if the half bee was stationary the train too must have been stationary.

The bee stopped the train.

Discuss.

 

Is the answer raspberry jam? Do I win?

[paris]

Check out todays echo for update "Everything going to plan"

[saintbletch]

You've raised an important issue.

 

A bee was flying northwards when it was struck by a train coming southwards.

Half the bee was thrown away from the train and need not concern us.

The other half of the bee stuck to the front of the train and proceded with the train in a southernly direction.

clearly there was a moment at impact when the bee travelling north changed to a southerly direction and was stationary.

But that half of the stationary bee was stuck to the front of the train.

So if the half bee was stationary the train too must have been stationary.

The bee stopped the train.

Discuss.

 

 

That should do it.

[Pilchards]

Is the answer raspberry jam? Do I win?

 

You've raised an important issue.

 

A bee was flying northwards when it was struck by a train coming southwards.

Half the bee was thrown away from the train and need not concern us.

The other half of the bee stuck to the front of the train and proceded with the train in a southernly direction.

clearly there was a moment at impact when the bee travelling north changed to a southerly direction and was stationary.

But that half of the stationary bee was stuck to the front of the train.

So if the half bee was stationary the train too must have been stationary.

The bee stopped the train.

Discuss.

 

Half a bee was thrown out the train while another half was already on the window before the impact bee hit the train, So there is two bees now, If I could get another bee into this story then I will have the bee gees who was singing on the train which caused it to stop as the driver ran away because of the racket!

 

That the answer?

[eelpie]

how on earth did this thread survive the night!! :-)

 

No idea...

[Shroppie]

It is a mathematical fact that 0 raised to any power is 0.

 

It is another mathematical fact that any number to the power of 0 is 1.

 

It has therefore always worried me that 0 to the power 0 must simultaneously be both 0 and 1.

[eelpie]

Check out todays echo for update "Everything going to plan"

 

So has this thread reached it's no news objective yet?

 

Or is there more to come?

[Shroppie]

So has this thread reached it's no news objective yet?

 

Or is there more to come?

 

Quite possibly a lot more nothing

[Saint Martini]

Helemaal niets

Absolut ingenting (No, that's not a new vodka flavour)

Absolut nichts

Absolutt ingenting

Absoluutselt mitte midagi

Yhtään mitään

Nic

Absolutně nic

Absolut intet

[landford.saint]

Scientists keep insisting that at the beginning of time, before time and anyhing at all existed there was Nothing,,

All of a sudden this Nothing exploded and started the Universe.

 

The question has been how can Nothing generate huge quantities of hot gases.

 

This thread has answered that. :-)

[INFLUENCED.COM]

Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal.

Nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.

[James_O_Mac]

What is more greater than god,

More evil than the devil,

The poor have it,

The rich need it,

and without it, you would die?

[Polaroid Saint]

Surprised no-one has pointed out this bit of insight;

 

There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know.

Donald Rumsfeld

 

Which I think can give us all comfort in these difficult times. ;-)

[Shroppie]

What is more greater than god,

More evil than the devil,

The poor have it,

The rich need it,

and without it, you would die?

 

I refer my honorable friend to posts 26 and 27 of this thread

[Shroppie]

Surprised no-one has pointed out this bit of insight;

 

There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know.

Donald Rumsfeld

 

Which I think can give us all comfort in these difficult times. ;-)

 

How can we know there are unknown unknowns?

[Evo]

To quote the legened that is Donald Rumsdeld:

 

"There are known knowns. There are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we now know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we do not know we don’t know"

 

Or, in Saints' context,

 

There are those we know who know, there are those we know don't know and there are those who we don't know that they don't know. Then there are the ITKs.

[Evo]

Surprised no-one has pointed out this bit of insight;

 

There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know.

Donald Rumsfeld

 

Which I think can give us all comfort in these difficult times. ;-)

 

Dag nam it you beat be to it! Bleeding customers keep disrupting on the damn phone :mad:

[James_O_Mac]

I refer my honorable friend to posts 26 and 27 of this thread

 

Sorry, clearly all I saw was a whole lot of nothing.

[Weston Super Saint]

Dag nam it you beat be to it! Bleeding customers keep disrupting on the damn phone :mad:

 

Uh Oh, the Bees are back :shock:

[saintbletch]

How can we know there are unknown unknowns?

 

Shroppie, if you have to ask that question, you will never understand the answer.

 

This thread is the Internet equivalent of prison officers "letting" inmates have access to soft drugs.

 

The mods have obviously decided that if they let us continue posting ad nauseam, literally about nothing, at least we won't riot.

 

I propose that we carry out a sit down in B Wing until we get some real news from Mark Fry.

[badgerx16]

"You say it best, when you say nothing at all"

 

"Nothing really matters, anyone can see.

Nothing really matters.

Nothing really matters to me"

[badgerx16]

The Devil is greater than nothing.

Nothing is greater than God.

Therefore, the Devil is greater than God.

 

[Horley CTFC Saint]

I've just bought the Official Tour de France Survival Pack

[Shroppie]

Shroppie, if you have to ask that question, you will never understand the answer.

 

 

The answer to Life, the Universe and Everything was 42 and I understood that. But I accept I may not understand Life, the Universe and Nothing.

[Evo]

Uh Oh, the Bees are back :shock:

 

Oh behave!

[trousers]

I'll watch you crumble, Like a very old wall (ooh)

And I'll see you stranded (yeah), You took me for a fool (ooh)

I'll have my revenge (ooh, oohm, yeah)

'Cause I owe you nothing, nothing at all

 

I owe you nothing, no, nothing at all

I owe you nothing, nothing, nothing at all

Nothing, nothing at all, all, no, no

 

I'll watch you suffer, With no feelings, No feelings at all (ooh)

And I'll see you desperate (yeah), You won't hear my call

And he who laughs last (ooh, oohm, yeah)

Owes you sweet nothing, nothing at all

 

I owe you nothing, no nothing at all

I owe you nothing, nothing, nothing at all

 

I was yours and you were mi-i-ine

Then but you ran around and told me li-i-ies

But you got big (big) big (big) trouble (trouble), Oh-oh

(I owe you nothing, ooh-ooh)

 

No-no-no-no-no-no-no-no, (I owe you nothing)

no-no, no-no, ooh-ooh-ooh, (I owe you nothing)

You know you know, while I could go, yeah-yeah, (I owe you nothing)

And I think you know know know, (I owe you nothing)

No you just, and girl you just have to let go-o-o-o, yeah-eah, hoo-hoo-hoo

(I owe you nothing)

Girl you better let go-o, go-o, (I owe you nothing)

As they say I go, walk out, I don't just stay-ay, yeah-eah

(I owe you nothing)

Yeah-yeah, No-no, yeah-yeah.... (fade)

[trousers]

Post office clerks put up signs saying position closed

And secretaries turn off typewriters and put on their coats

Janitors padlock the gates

For security guards to patrol

And bachelors phone up their friends for a drink

While the married ones turn on a chat show

 

And they'll all be lonely tonight and lonely tomorrow

 

Gentlemen time please, you know we can't serve anymore

Now the traffic lights change to stop, when there's nothing to go

And by five o'clock everything's dead

And every third car is a cab

And ignorant people sleep in their beds

Like the doped white mice in the college lab

 

Nothing ever happens, nothing happens at all

The needle returns to the start of the song

And we all sing along like before

 

And we'll all be lonely tonight and lonely tomorrow

 

Telephone exchanges click while there's nobody there

The Martians could land in the carpark and no one would care

Close-circuit cameras in department stores shoot the same video every day

And the stars of these films neither die nor get killed

Just survive constant action replay

 

Nothing ever happens, nothing happens at all

The needle returns to the start of the song

And we all sing along like before

 

And we'll all be lonely tonight and lonely tomorrow

 

Bill hoardings advertise products that nobody needs

While angry from Manchester writes to complain about

All the repeats on T.V.

And computer terminals report some gains

On the values of copper and tin

While American businessmen snap up Van Goghs

For the price of a hospital wing

 

Nothing ever happens, nothing happens at all

The needle returns to the start of the song

And we all sing along like before

Nothing ever happens, nothing happens at all

They'll burn down the synagogues at six o'clock

And we'll all go along like before

 

And we'll all be lonely tonight and lonely tomorrow

[saintinlondon]

"I love talking about nothing. It's the only thing I know anything about"

 

Also Oscar Wilde

 

i prefer 'work is the curse of the drinking classes.' how philosophical

[badgerx16]

The ( Ultimate ) answer to Life, the Universe and Everything is 42

Which suggests that what you really need to know is 'What was the Question?'.

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/hitchhikers/guide/answer.shtml

Edited 11 June, 2009 by badgerx16

[badgerx16]

i prefer 'work is the curse of the drinking classes.' how philosophical

'Reality is a condition brought about by a lack of alcohol'.

[Cheesymash]

He knows everything about nothing,

But not to much about that!

So if you know someone who knows what he knows,

Then you must know Henry's Cat!

[EastleighSoulBoy]

Surprised no-one has pointed out this bit of insight;

 

There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know.

Donald Rumsfeld

 

Which I think can give us all comfort in these difficult times. ;-)

 

And with that type of thinking we started a bloody war!

[fanimal]

Turkish for .......

[Eyes k8]

Half a bee was thrown out the train while another half was already on the window before the impact bee hit the train, So there is two bees now, If I could get another bee into this story then I will have the bee gees who was singing on the train which caused it to stop as the driver ran away because of the racket!

 

That the answer?

 

Two bees or not two bees that is the question.

 

 

No No no not 2 bees just a single bee flying along happily in the sunshine in a northerly direction humming Play Up Pompey when smack a great big southern bound train carrying stripey people hits him head on. What remains of him is stuck to the train and heads back the way he came i.e. South. Now as he was heading north but is now heading south there must have been a moment when he stopped and changed direction. At that moment he must have been stationary. But as he was stuck to the train, the train must also have been stationary. Yes? True? Simples! So the bee stopped the train. Think about it. should keep you going till dd is completed.

[JustMike]

boo bees ;-)

[Shroppie]

Two bees or not two bees that is the question.

 

 

No No no not 2 bees just a single bee flying along happily in the sunshine in a northerly direction humming Play Up Pompey when smack a great big southern bound train carrying stripey people hits him head on. What remains of him is stuck to the train and heads back the way he came i.e. South. Now as he was heading north but is now heading south there must have been a moment when he stopped and changed direction. At that moment he must have been stationary. But as he was stuck to the train, the train must also have been stationary. Yes? True? Simples! So the bee stopped the train. Think about it. should keep you going till dd is completed.

 

 

This explains why every train I travel on keeps stopping momentarily then instantly accelerating back up to 100mph without me noticing.

 

Just realised we achieved three pages of nothing.