Joke

[Dog]

For the past week I've passed a young girl on my way to work, she sits under the bridge, asking for spare change.

 

I got talking to her, turns out she's Polish. She told me how her family were forced out of their homes, had to live in the forests and hide from soldiers.

 

She was forced to watch as her sisters and mother were abused by the soldiers, her brothers were shot and taken away to labour camps.

 

Her grasp of the English language wasn't great.

 

Her grip on my English c*ck, however, was fantastic.

 

Best 50 pence I've ever spent.

[Dog]

A pub landlord is shutting up for the night when there is a knock at the door. When he answers, a Tramp asks him for a toothpick. He gives him the toothpick and the tramp leaves.

 

A few minutes later there is a second knock. When he answers, there is a second Tramp who also asks for a toothpick. He gets his toothpick and off he goes.

 

There is a third knock at the door, and a third Tramp. The landlord says, "Don't tell me, you want a toothpick too."

 

"No, a straw," says the Tramp.

 

The landlord gives him a straw but is curious as to why he wants it, so he asks the Tramp why he wants a straw and not a toothpick.

 

To which the Tramp replies, "Some bloke just threw up outside but all the good stuff's gone already".

[INFLUENCED.COM]

Not to be too cynical but don't you think people rush into getting married nowadays, I mean take Jade Goody and that Jack fella............... I'll give it a month

[hamster]

you r a sick bastard hampsters wife

[hamster]

you r a sick bastard hampsters wife

 

I sincerely apologise for that, I inadvertently left the laptop unattended. Please do as I do and ignore her.