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Summer Transfer Window 2023


FarehamSaintJames

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Completely off topic of course, but linked to the Spike Milligan comments and and (I think) a funny story for you Spike fans.....with a tenuous link to football.

I was privileged to meet Spike a few times and would occasionally see him in the Bayswater (London) area, where he had his office. I still have a personal letter I received from him which I treasure.

Anyway - the story.....It was 1997 (I just checked) and my Dad's Birthday was approaching. I saw that Spike was signing a new book about The Goons at John Menzies in the City of London. My Dad was a massive Goons fan. I was working in London at the time, and thought it would make a great present, so on the day, I parked my car in the City (those were the days) and went off to John Menzies. There was already a massive queue around the shop and I joined the end of it. The queue moved at a snail's pace partly because Spike didn't just sign people's books, but had a chat, or a laugh and joke with absolutely everyone he was signing the book for. I queued for about 2 hours in total. It felt like it was taking forever. As I queued, I noticed all around the shop were signs and posters displayed, which read 'NEXT WEEK! JIMMY GREAVES WILL BE SIGNING COPIES OF HIS NEW BOOK'.

Eventually it was my turn to step forward and have my book signed. I stepped forward but suddenly stopped in front of him. "Oh bloody hell" I said. "What's wrong?" asked Spike. I said "I've queued here for two solid hours to get my book signed and I thought you were Jimmy Greaves!" He laughed. I laughed. Everyone around laughed. He took the next book off the pile and said "I am Jimmy Greaves. Do you want me to sign it Jimmy Greaves?" (More laughter) I said "No, it's for my Dad, he won't get the joke, you'd better sign it Spike Milligan". More laughter. I left the shop, returned to my car and of course......I'd got a parking ticket for overstaying my welcome.

My Dad passed away 10 years ago, but when he died I took possession of the book and still have it......published 1997.....and thankfully signed "Spike Milligan" and not Jimmy Greaves. Yes I've read all his "war" books. Incredibly funny and sad in equal measure. He was certainly a hero of mine. The man was, with the greatest respect, completely bonkers in terms of his comedy, but then he was, in my opinion, a genius.

As I say, completely off topic, but thanks for letting me share this memory. I have other stories about him, but another time maybe. 

Edited by Saint Keef
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1 minute ago, Ted Bates Statue said:

So my hopes of JWP failing the medical and having to play for us in the Championship turned out to be futile, then

The guy who has never been injured. Hes passed the medical so well that we should ask for an extra few mill 😂

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3 hours ago, revolution saint said:

I've been following Caicedo and his career with interest.  He's a baller.  He's got a hammer for a right foot, a cultured left foot that acts as both a wand and can open a tin of beans, a football for both an eye and a brain.  I'd say he doesn't just glide across the pitch - more like he hovers above it.

Oh and, for a big man, he's got a great first touch and he can leap like a trout.

Worth £110M of anyones money and then some.

Agreed bro, he is sick tekkers, has it in his locker to be the GOAT CDM. He will cook at Chelsea bruv. 

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9 minutes ago, Saint Keef said:

Completely off topic of course, but linked to the Spike Milligan comments and and (I think) a funny story for you Spike fans.....with a tenuous link to football.

I was privileged to meet Spike a few times and would occasionally see him in the Bayswater (London) area, where he had his office. I still have a personal letter I received from him which I treasure.

Anyway - the story.....It was 1997 (I just checked) and my Dad's Birthday was approaching. I saw that Spike was signing a new book about The Goons at John Menzies in the City of London. My Dad was a massive Goons fan. I was working in London at the time, and thought it would make a great present, so on the day, I parked my car in the City (those were the days) and went off to John Menzies. There was already a massive queue around the shop and I joined the end of it. The queue moved at a snail's pace partly because Spike didn't just sign people's books, but had a chat, or a laugh and joke with absolutely everyone he was signing the book for. I queued for about 2 hours in total. It felt like it was taking forever. As I queued, I noticed all around the shop were signs and posters displayed, which read 'NEXT WEEK! JIMMY GREAVES WILL BE SIGNING COPIES OF HIS NEW BOOK'.

Eventually it was my turn to step forward and have my book signed. I stepped forward but suddenly stopped in front of him. "Oh bloody hell" I said. "What's wrong?" asked Spike. I said "I've queued here for two solid hours to get my book signed and I thought you were Jimmy Greaves!" He laughed. I laughed. Everyone around laughed. He took the next book off the pile and said "I am Jimmy Greaves. Do you want me to sign it Jimmy Greaves?" (More laughter) I said "No, it's for my Dad, he won't get the joke, you'd better sign it Spike Milligan". More laughter. I left the shop, returned to my car and of course......I'd got a parking ticket for overstaying my welcome.

My Dad passed away 10 years ago, but when he died I took possession of the book and still have it......published 1997.....and thankfully signed "Spike Milligan" and not Jimmy Greaves. Yes I've read all his "war" books. Incredibly funny and sad in equal measure. He was certainly a hero of mine. The man was, with the greatest respect, completely bonkers in terms of his comedy, but then he was, in my opinion, a genius.

As I say, completely off topic, but thanks for letting me share this memory. I have other stories about him, but another time maybe. 

Thanks for sharing that, a welcome real world distraction from the humdrum of football nowadays 

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1 hour ago, Saint Matty 76 said:

Well then, fingers crossed that we're willing to tell Liverpool that it's no longer just £50m.

Wouldn’t hold your breath.. the trouble with us is we are so open with our policy of letting players move who want to move, Liverpool will know we won’t keep him even if they don’t match our valuation at some stage we will crumble because you can’t keep a unhappy player and themz the rules 

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1 minute ago, pimpin4rizeal said:

Wouldn’t hold your breath.. the trouble with us is we are so open with our policy of letting players move who want to move, Liverpool will know we won’t keep him even if they don’t match our valuation at some stage we will crumble because you can’t keep a unhappy player and themz the rules 

Yeah. I imagine realistically we've been quite open with Lavia and let him know that £50m does it. I can't see us going back on that if it's the case, even if it could've with the circumstances.

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3 hours ago, revolution saint said:

I didn't realise quite how bad a state Sheffield United are in - if they hadn't got promoted they would have been screwed.  Even now it doesn't look like they can do anything other than plan for a season at the bottom and try and get as much money as they can doing it.  Decent opportunity for Hamer and no doubt Sheffield United will probably make some money on him but I think they could be worse than we were last season and possibly threaten Derbys points tally.

Astounding 

 

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1 hour ago, Saint NL said:

Poor Lavia, Liverpool will buy him but he'll always be sloppy seconds 😥


his agent will probably sweet talk him  (£££) into thinking it was all a misunderstanding. Expect to see RL next to Klopps artificial toothy white grin at some point.

But you hope his professional pride will lead to him telling Liverpool to fuck off if they return.

 

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42 minutes ago, woodsaint1 said:

Any funny snippets from Liverpool forums? Im sure its a hoot on there right now 😂😂

"Just get Lavia for £50m."

"You think they’ll accept £50m for him now?"

"Well we will say, £50m or fuck off. And if Southampton wants to act like twats I’m sure we’ll remember."

"They'll never get more though will they? Especially if he stays in the Championship for a season if we walk away this summer."

And this belter about potentially missing out to Chelsea for Caicedo

"Are we the only club that doesn't tap up players these days?" 😮😮😮

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50 minutes ago, Saint NL said:

Can we just cancel the actual football and keep this transfer window going until May? It's great fun

It has been amusing but even I’m am getting frustrated that we havnt signed “ the mysterious four “ ……………… still confident but c’mon. I know Martin and Wilson said be patient but FFS get a fucking move on.🤯

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3 minutes ago, St. Neil said:

"Just get Lavia for £50m."

"You think they’ll accept £50m for him now?"

"Well we will say, £50m or fuck off. And if Southampton wants to act like twats I’m sure we’ll remember."

"They'll never get more though will they? Especially if he stays in the Championship for a season if we walk away this summer."

And this belter about potentially missing out to Chelsea for Caicedo

"Are we the only club that doesn't tap up players these days?" 😮😮😮

🤣

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3 minutes ago, New Forest Pony said:

Apologies if someone’s said this already but with Hamer going to Sheffield United I can see Coventry being interested in Matt Grimes. I know we’ve got the additional pull of Russell but hope we don’t hang about before they start sniffing around 

I think we can more than compete with Coventry City on fees and wages.

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3 hours ago, Sunglasses Ron said:

This from a Liverpool fan on BBC re: Caicedo / Lavia:

"I'd rather give the money to Brighton - like them as a club and Southampton were annoying".

Annoying how? For asking less than half the money for the player you just purchased?

Like the money is coming out of his own pocket ( or from his benefits more like),turd.

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5 hours ago, Convict Colony said:

Expect Bayern Munich to get involved in Lavia, weren't they looking at both Rice and Caicedo before.

Of FFS as far as I’m aware Kane isn’t sorted yet. I’m a world weary pragmatic sort of guy but I’m even getting unstable.

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47 minutes ago, OldNick said:

A bit stupid really as JWP is never out injured lol

Remember that time he was stretchered off for what looked like a very serious injury, received oxygen on the pitch?

Next game, back in the starting XI!

Madness! 

Edited by OttawaSaint
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56 minutes ago, coalman said:

Much as I'm enjoying the billionaire's toy pissing contest between Liverpool and Chelsea I'd rather hear about us signing a new striker, new keeper and new centre back. Or at least 2 out of the 3.

Judging from RM comments at the press conference I think you are going to have to be patient. He said nothing is close at the moment and, whilst that could change, my take was that he doesn't expect new arrivals, other than possibly Downes on loan, in the near future.

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Just now, saintant said:

Judging from RM comments at the press conference I think you are going to have to be patient. He said nothing is close at the moment and, whilst that could change, my take was that he doesn't expect new arrivals, other than possibly Downes on loan, in the near future.

Have you a link to the recording?

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2 minutes ago, saintant said:

Judging from RM comments at the press conference I think you are going to have to be patient. He said nothing is close at the moment and, whilst that could change, my take was that he doesn't expect new arrivals, other than possibly Downes on loan, in the near future.

Really odd this. Fully expected there to be contingency plans once players had left. So it seems the club is not as financially buoyant as many on here have suggested. Recouping money perhaps.

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2 minutes ago, Toadhall Saint said:

Have you a link to the recording?

I watched it live on the official site but I'm sure it'll be available soon. A big chunk of it was about JWP although he also intimated that Lavia won't play tomorrow - no surprise.

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34 minutes ago, Saint Matty 76 said:

Yeah. I imagine realistically we've been quite open with Lavia and let him know that £50m does it. I can't see us going back on that if it's the case, even if it could've with the circumstances.

Can't we at least try for 51M provided they take some of our deadwood?

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6 minutes ago, saintant said:

I watched it live on the official site but I'm sure it'll be available soon. A big chunk of it was about JWP although he also intimated that Lavia won't play tomorrow - no surprise.

Odd that we would let jwp and Lavia leave and then have to play a game with no replacements. Weakens us significantly. 

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Just now, hypochondriac said:

Odd that we would let jwp and Lavia leave and then have to play a game with no replacements. Weakens us significantly. 

I'm assuming Downes is viewed as the replacement for JWP although agree no official confirmation yet. Lavia hasn't featured this season but I'm sure he'll be replaced once we have the money from his transfer.

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5 hours ago, santolijador said:

Fully expect Lavia to go to Chelsea now. Joe Shields, a 48m bid rejected and now missing out on Caicedo with a 100m bid. They have the money and Poch probably wants a CDM to sit alongside Enzo 
 

I wonder though, could RM channel some of that disappointed energy, and get him to put in one more mssterclass this weekend for Norwich? As a kind of 'prove them wrong' jobby. 
 

Probably not, but would be nice. I guess we will see Chelsea move quickly having missed out on Moises

The Joe Shields link isn’t that stupid. When he left us for Chelsea they turned a blind eye to Wilcox doing some under the counter scouting for us while Wilcox was still under contract with City/

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The way I see it is..

We won't sign a striker until one of Adams/Onuachu have left. We won't sign a CM until Lavia has left. We won't sign a CB until ABK goes. We won't sign a RB unless KWP goes. Let's just hope we don't sell all these players on or around deadline day eh...

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6 minutes ago, hypochondriac said:

Odd that we would let jwp and Lavia leave and then have to play a game with no replacements. Weakens us significantly. 

Dunno we still have Tella, Che, Aribo, Stephens, Charlie, Bazunu, Armstrong etc I still reckon they all , with a drop in leagues and continue to to follow Martins lead all have a big part to play. Don’t judge them on last season.

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3 hours ago, Badger said:

Even more so when they come crawling back to enquire about Lavia and we tell them it’s now £60m plus % sell on. 

“There has been rampant inflation in the cost of midfield players over the last few days. Surprised you haven’t heard about it ..  “

This please!

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4 minutes ago, manji said:

Dunno we still have Tella, Che, Aribo, Stephens, Charlie, Bazunu, Armstrong etc I still reckon they all , with a drop in leagues and continue to to follow Martins lead all have a big part to play. Don’t judge them on last season.

None of those players play in the same positions as Lavia and JWP. 

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I reckon we'll end up with Downes and Grimes to replace to JWP and Lavia. Annoying that we have to go through this limbo stage whilst we deal with the "big" clubs offering below our asking prices, which goes back to RM's recent comments that the window should end before the season starts.

 

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5 hours ago, Saint Fan CaM said:

Come on, after the shambles of last season and the continuing inability of our defence to cope with set plays high into the box, its clear there’s plenty of evidence. And in terms of Burnley, I was reflecting on their entire season, not just one game.

Two of our back four are different to last season. Different coach and worse opponents too. You don't know how we will go this season, just as Burnley Fans didn't know at the start of last season how they'd go without three or four of their starting prem defenders.

Saying we aren't as good as a side that won the league when you don't know how good we actually are is just speculation. We might be better...yeah, ok, I'm kidding myself now.

 

 

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