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Posted

Your wife/girlfriend/mistress will frequently say one thing but mean the complete opposite. If she says everything is "fine" or "nothing is wrong" she actually means she is not "fine" and "something is wrong"....

Posted (edited)

Wearing odd socks brings humour, diversity and life into situations you were not expecting.

 

I never wanted to say it right after the OP, but wearing the same socks every single day? You've never lived until you've crapped your pants.

Edited by Ohio Saint
Posted (edited)
Not learnt exactly - but getting confidence earlier in life would have made a huge difference

 

I agree, kinda. I've found though that too many people get successful by unmerited confidence over substance. I truly respect a person that is confident because they can actually back it up.

 

Unless, of course you were just talking about confidence with girls, that would be an altogether different book.

Edited by Ohio Saint
Posted

Oddly,

 

My brother had, I thought, all the breaks I felt I never had as a second child. He went to Uni and became a dentist. money was shorter after that so I left school and got an apprenticeship. He was a dentist who started work at the same practice that he is now a partner of and still works there. I was a carpenter who went from job to job and also moved around to different countries to live.

A couple of years ago, I mentioned to my daughter that I had always been a bit jealous of my brother's life, long holidays in Spain, security and respect.....She almost fell out ofe her chair! She was in touch with one of his daughters and told me that he had always been jealous of ME for travelling around, doing whatever I wanted and always landing on better ground!

 

So obviously, the grass is always greener, and maybe that should be taken into account before we get into that time machine and try to upgrade our lives. In retrospect, I don't think I want to be a dentist after all.

Posted

Been thinking about this topic more. :)

 

You know what? If I knew then what I know now, I would not change the time my heart was broken by the girl I still wonder about even now. It wasn't an error, it was a lesson. I don't regret being married to a witch for 23 years, it consolidated the bond between my daughter and myself, who was much more aware of the situation than I was......Anything I remember about my past ends with a positive that you just can't see at the time.

 

I think if you were able to go back in time and correct all the 'mistakes' you would make your life the blandest of potato salads

Posted

Personally I wish I'd heard her husband coming up the garden path slightly earlier.

Maybe overtaking that lorry in Curdridge wasn't as wise as I thought at the time.

That white trousers and shoes combo was a mistake.

Other than that, I've been fairly happy just learning as I go.

But anyone who says they have no regrets is kidding themselves - and no one else.

Posted
Personally I wish I'd heard her husband coming up the garden path slightly earlier.

Maybe overtaking that lorry in Curdridge wasn't as wise as I thought at the time.

That white trousers and shoes combo was a mistake.

Other than that, I've been fairly happy just learning as I go.

But anyone who says they have no regrets is kidding themselves - and no one else.

 

Disagree. My mistakes have led me to where I am today, and if I’m happy with that, why would I have any regrets?

Posted
In later life it’s often said “You never regret what you’ve done, only what you haven’t done”

 

That’s just something people say when they are too old to remember how bad and embarrassing some of the stuff they did was.

Posted
That’s just something people say when they are too old to remember how bad and embarrassing some of the stuff they did was.

:)

 

Embarrassing?

 

The one advantage of getting old is that you can say and do whatever you like.

Posted
Giving an honest answer to the question “does my bum look big in this” is not a good idea.

 

"I dont think the clothes have anything to do with it, luv.

Posted
If there's nothing on your journey that could be improved by a minor tweak, you are very fortunate.

 

That’s not the same as a regret though. You wouldn’t regret getting 98% in a test because you could have got 100%, unless the person is a perfectionist, in which case they’re doomed to a miserable existence anyway

Posted

But I knew that someday I was going to die, and just before I died, two things would happen: Number 1, I would regret my entire life. Number 2, I would want to live my life over again.

 

Hubert Selby Jr.

Posted
But I knew that someday I was going to die, and just before I died, two things would happen: Number 1, I would regret my entire life. Number 2, I would want to live my life over again.

 

Hubert Selby Jr.

Posted
But I knew that someday I was going to die, and just before I died, two things would happen: Number 1, I would regret my entire life. Number 2, I would want to live my life over again.

 

Hubert Selby Jr.

We all

Are of

Walking abortions

Shalom

Shalom

We all love our children.

Posted
Personally I wish I'd heard her husband coming up the garden path slightly earlier.

 

They say you can't pee with an erection.

 

Maybe so. But you can definitely shit with one when her husband gets home early.

Posted
They say you can't pee with an erection.

 

Maybe so. But you can definitely shit with one when her husband gets home early.

 

You can pee with an erection.

 

It comes out really powerfully and straight. If you're going in the toilet standing up you need to squat so that you can angle it straight into the back of the pan.

Posted (edited)
You can pee with an erection.

 

It comes out really powerfully and straight. If you're going in the toilet standing up you need to squat so that you can angle it straight into the back of the pan.

 

Alas many of us are forkers.

Edited by shurlock

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