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Posted

Sitting in my living room with a cold, with a bog roll next to me on the sofa, then going for a dump and forgetting said bog roll, thus ending up unarmed in a state of reduced hygiene.

Posted
Whatever end you open a packet of tablets, you'll ALWAYS get the end with the piece of paper (that no-one reads) wrapped over the pills.

 

Schrödinger's paper insert. It exists at both ends of the packet simultaneously until you select which end will be opened.

Posted
People sitting at the entrance of a petrol station waiting to see what lane comes free first, blocking anyone else from entering and eventually blocking the road.

 

People pulling up to petrol pumps just to go in to the store to buy stuff.

 

Going to add people who get back into their cars and then fiddle about for ages before pulling off; write milage in a little ****in book, set the sat nav, adjust the mirror, pull on the seat belt and then pull away.

Posted
"The HMS.....". It's either "HMS Shipname" or "The Shipname", and the BBC, as the biggest culprit, should know better.

 

HMS Shipname? Bloody hell, the navy are really lacking imagination these days, even Wifename or Mydogname could think of something better!

Posted

Small writing on food packaging. All I want is to know how long it takes in the oven which shouldn’t have the same focus and prominence of the emulsifier details.

Posted
HMS Shipname? Bloody hell, the navy are really lacking imagination these days, even Wifename or Mydogname could think of something better!

Remember, we are the nation that gave the World "Boaty McBoatface".

( Also, on Monday I saw a road cleaning truck named Meryl Sweep ).

Posted
Remember, we are the nation that gave the World "Boaty McBoatface".

That name was superb and should have stuck.

 

I should add to this thread "People who put decisions in the hands of the public then get upset when they don't like the public's decision (this comment is NOT Brexit related)."

Posted (edited)

HMS Boaty McBoatface.

Settled. The perfect name for a ship.

 

The popular vote always wins except in general elections.

Edited by Ohio Saint
Posted
People who create silly names for themselves. Bear Grylls for example (real name Edward).

 

Not quite as toe curlingly pretentious as the names he gave his kids - Marmaduke Mickey Percy Grylls and Huckleberry Edward Jocelyne Grylls

 

What a ****ing tosser. Sadistic one at that.

Posted

Lorries overtaking other lorries on the motorway, creating a massive queue of traffic in their wake as one speed limited tosser fights to get in front of another speed limited tosser who could slow down a couple of mph to help everyone out but would rather be a ****.

Posted

paper straws. What is the point?

 

I was at the zoo yesterday and in the cafe, bought a cold drink. Plastic cup, plastic lid, paper straw :lol:

 

at least some feel better about themselves, I guess

Posted
paper straws. What is the point?

 

I was at the zoo yesterday and in the cafe, bought a cold drink. Plastic cup, plastic lid, paper straw :lol:

 

at least some feel better about themselves, I guess

Apparently, McDonalds' paper straws cannot be recycled !

Posted

People getting on trains on the first carriage then walking the whole length to find a seat , even though the train is not due to leave for another 10/15 minutes.

 

Just walk along the platform ffs.

Posted
paper straws. What is the point?

 

I was at the zoo yesterday and in the cafe, bought a cold drink. Plastic cup, plastic lid, paper straw :lol:

 

at least some feel better about themselves, I guess

 

So you don't think filling the oceans with plastic crap is an issue?

Posted
So you don't think filling the oceans with plastic crap is an issue?

 

Yes it is

 

but banning plastic straws (which apparently can be recycled) for paper straws (that apparently can't) to be used with a plastic cup (with a plastic lid) is f-ing stupid

 

Same with paper bags in supermarkets. The carbon footprint is make those is more damaging to the environment than plastic bags.

As long as people feel better about themselves making almost no positive impact to the environment, great!

Posted
Yes it is

 

but banning plastic straws (which apparently can be recycled) for paper straws (that apparently can't) to be used with a plastic cup (with a plastic lid) is f-ing stupid

 

Same with paper bags in supermarkets. The carbon footprint is make those is more damaging to the environment than plastic bags.

As long as people feel better about themselves making almost no positive impact to the environment, great!

 

Paper is biodegradable.

 

Plastic is not.

 

The cups can be recycled at specialist centres.

 

The lids are made from recycled plastic.

Posted
I like to throw plastic straws at dolphins.

 

Universities banning beef burgers. Come on everyone do your bit.

 

Throw in Prince Hewitt graciously claiming not to have any more than 2 kids. Every little helps!

Posted
Yes it is

 

but banning plastic straws (which apparently can be recycled) for paper straws (that apparently can't) to be used with a plastic cup (with a plastic lid) is f-ing stupid

 

Same with paper bags in supermarkets. The carbon footprint is make those is more damaging to the environment than plastic bags.

As long as people feel better about themselves making almost no positive impact to the environment, great!

 

The straws are biodegradable and therefore much less harmful

I've not been to a British supermarket with paper bags, pretty much everywhere is reusable bags now.

Harry and Meg have never claimed they would solve the worlds problems but they're doing their bit. If everyone only had 2 or fewer children, it would solve 90% of the environment's issues.

Posted
Throw in Prince Hewitt graciously claiming not to have any more than 2 kids. Every little helps!

 

To be fair the carbon footprint of the average Royal is probably not very little.

Posted
Why exactly does this annoy you??
Because the two children he does have will on average have a much much larger carbon footprint than most other people in the country. The only reason he announced that was to virtue signal and make himself feel good about what a special person he is. That attitude which is pervasive in modern society is what annoys me.
Posted

Call centres. Especially ones that spend the first couple of minutes telling you that you can find all your answers on their website. Don't they realise that if I could find what I wanted there I wouldn't be calling them?

Posted
People getting on trains on the first carriage then walking the whole length to find a seat , even though the train is not due to leave for another 10/15 minutes.

 

Just walk along the platform ffs.

 

^Very much this

 

And the cretins that do this tend to have 16 bags strapped around their neck, thus clattering into everyone as they walk down the carriage. Buffoons.

Posted
Call centres. Especially ones that spend the first couple of minutes telling you that you can find all your answers on their website. Don't they realise that if I could find what I wanted there I wouldn't be calling them?

 

And every single call centre on the planet plays the recorded "We're experiencing an unusally high volume of calls at the moment" message.... no you're f***ing not.... what you're experiencing is a NORMAL volume of calls... the same number of calls you've received on average for the last 79,478 days.... stop lying to people you utter *****

Posted
Because the two children he does have will on average have a much much larger carbon footprint than most other people in the country. The only reason he announced that was to virtue signal and make himself feel good about what a special person he is. That attitude which is pervasive in modern society is what annoys me.

 

I am pleased to know that you are privy to Prince Harry's inner thoughts and know why he does things.

 

Perhaps you could expand this skill to someone more important - like Ralph Hassenhutl.

Posted
I am pleased to know that you are privy to Prince Harry's inner thoughts and know why he does things.

 

Perhaps you could expand this skill to someone more important - like Ralph Hassenhutl.

How else would you explain the announcement? If he was sincere in his desire to help the planet then he would renounce his titles and live a much meagre lifestyle. He won't of course which is why it's quite acceptable to question his motives for the announcement
Posted

Suggestions that people are incapable of communicating with others while driving.

I'm horrified to discover that there are sections of the population that require 100% of their brain capacity to operate a car.

Most people have plenty spare and can talk, think, listen to music etc.

Get the thickos off the road.

Posted

I used to save the crossword for the drive home. Frowned upon now.

 

I don't know if you've spent any time in Turkey. People there know how to operate vehicles. I once saw a lad riding his motor scooter through the pedestrian area of a shopping mall, one handed, the other hand holding a beer bottle and all without the need of a helmet.

Posted
Lorries overtaking other lorries on the motorway, creating a massive queue of traffic in their wake as one speed limited tosser fights to get in front of another speed limited tosser who could slow down a couple of mph to help everyone out but would rather be a ****.

 

Having just driven up and down France this was a particular problem with their two lane roads. Although tbf their roads embarrass ours with how quickly you can get around.

Lorry drivers are generally cnts.

Posted
Suggestions that people are incapable of communicating with others while driving.

I'm horrified to discover that there are sections of the population that require 100% of their brain capacity to operate a car.

Most people have plenty spare and can talk, think, listen to music etc.

Get the thickos off the road.

 

They could start by prosecuting those who operate their phones. Every day on M3 I see double figure numbers.

Posted
Reckon that Scandinavian eco campaigning kid going to USA on a boat with no fridge might really wind up Batman.

 

I feel sorry for her. She is a pawn in a political game.

Posted

South Today and Meridian News have both surrendered.

National features cobbled together between thinly-disguised adverts for their own programmes, or dull stories about plucky pets.

RIP local news.

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