The small things in life that annoy you

[badgerx16]

14 minutes ago, Manuel said:

Daisy daisy daisy daisy daisy daisy daisy daisy daisy daisy

The first word our grand-daughter learned. Daisy is their dog.

[cloggy saint]

1 hour ago, Manuel said:

My daughter's boyfriend uses that phrase a lot...slightly annoying  He's otherwise a pretty decent bloke though to be fair. 

At least you used it in context. Most just stick it at the beginning or end of every sentence as some kind of vocal tic when it has absolutely nothing to do with being fair or otherwise.

[Fan The Flames]

8 hours ago, cloggy saint said:

Still the incessant use of 'to be fair'. It's the linguistic equivalent of grey jogging bottoms and cheap trainers.

And 'I'm not going to not lie', the linguistic equivalent of taking a date to Nandos.

[farawaysaint]

1 hour ago, cloggy saint said:

At least you used it in context. Most just stick it at the beginning or end of every sentence as some kind of vocal tic when it has absolutely nothing to do with being fair or otherwise.

I do this 🥲

[skintsaint]

Baby-led weaning.

[Weston Super Saint]

8 hours ago, farawaysaint said:

I do this 🥲

Me too, to be fair.

[Lighthouse]

People who say they were, "dead for eight minutes," if they have some sort of cardiac arrest. No, one of your organs stopped functioning temporarily, death isn’t a temporary affliction.

[badgerx16]

"Your parcel was delivered to the safe location at your address at 12:15".

No it fucking wasn't. At 12:15 I was working in the front garden replacing a fence post, 3 feet from our front gate, and your courier did not turn up.

[Weston Super Saint]

29 minutes ago, badgerx16 said:

"Your parcel was delivered to the safe location at your address at 12:15".

No it fucking wasn't. At 12:15 I was working in the front garden replacing a fence post, 3 feet from our front gate, and your courier did not turn up.

Maybe you needed your safe word?

[badgerx16]

16 minutes ago, Weston Super Saint said:

Maybe you needed your safe word?

We received an email from EVRI telling us it had been delivered to our "safe place". No photo, no card through the door. Contacted EVRI, got through to a bot - no use at all. Contacted the seller of the goods, they had received a photo confirming delivery, it showed a woman stood in a porch holding a box; did not show her head, or any feature identifying the house, only that she was wearing blue socks.

Tried the neighbours on our left, not them . The house on our right is empty. Got back to the vendors, who did a bit more digging and found out it was apparently at #19, 3 houses away; no, not there either.

Finally got a street view shot of where it was apparently "delivered" - 4 houses further up the road.

Edited 26 November, 2022 by badgerx16

[Whitey Grandad]

My wife was waiting for an order from Next. She had a text saying that it would be delivered between 12:30 and 13:30. Then at 13:45 she had another saying that it would be delivered between 14:30 and 16:30. She was sitting in the lounge and she heard something being put through the letterbox. She looked out of the window and saw the EVRI driver rushing back to his van so she ran out barefoot to catch him. Her car was in the garage so he thought there was nobody at home. Her car is always in the garage.

He left the delivery with our neighbours whose two cars were outside but when she knocked on their door they didn’t answer. She had to call again later.

[buctootim]

On 18/11/2022 at 17:49, whelk said:

Receiving an email from BA asking if I want to donate my Avios points to charity.

They aren’t a tangible thing you twats just you removing a customer loyalty bonus

I signed up to that when it was airmiles. Gradually got degraded to the point it was a complete con. Made me less loyal to them not more. 

[badgerx16]

Post script to the non-delivery posted above;

When we went to check at the house where the parcel had been 'delivered' they were out, so we decided to wait until today to pick it up. This morning, just after 09:00 we received another email from EVRI saying our parcel would be delivered this morning, before 10:00 ! Sure enough, at 10:05 it arrived. Luckily we hadn't yet gone to the other house for a parcel that wasn't there.

 

[egg]

5 minutes ago, badgerx16 said:

Post script to the non-delivery posted above;

When we went to check at the house where the parcel had been 'delivered' they were out, so we decided to wait until today to pick it up. This morning, just after 09:00 we received another email from EVRI saying our parcel would be delivered this morning, before 10:00 ! Sure enough, at 10:05 it arrived. Luckily we hadn't yet gone to the other house for a parcel that wasn't there.

 

But what was in the parcel? Love honey? Shoes? I vote hoover bags...

[badgerx16]

9 minutes ago, egg said:

But what was in the parcel? Love honey? Shoes? I vote hoover bags...

Red hot pokers.

 

( The plants, not the tools of medieval regicide ).

[Turkish]

these completely pointless studies that are carried out by universities.

For example it was revealed today that a study by Portsmouth University that if you ate a roast dinner every day for a year you would eat the equivilent of two plastic bags. 

https://www.express.co.uk/life-style/health/1702308/roast-dinner-microplastics

 

[trousers]

People that order goods from companies (e.g. Next) that use shite couriers (e.g. Evri)

Edited 28 November, 2022 by trousers

[badgerx16]

51 minutes ago, trousers said:

People that order goods from companies (e.g. Next) that use shite couriers (e.g. Evri)

Presumably you always contact online vendors before completing a purchase so as to verify that they exclusively use Royal Mail ?

[egg]

1 hour ago, trousers said:

People that order goods from companies (e.g. Next) that use shite couriers (e.g. Evri)

Our evri driver is amazing. Knows when we're home and delivers accordingly. She doesn't go on strike either.

[Turkish]

48 minutes ago, egg said:

Our evri driver is amazing. Knows when we're home and delivers accordingly. She doesn't go on strike either.

The guy that delivers our Gusto on a sunday morning is an absolute bellend, always wants to stop and chat about his holiday to Turkey or what woman he is flirting with on the delivery round. He's a bald, skinny tattooed man from wakefield who looks like he should be sitting in a wetherspoons all day rather than giving the women on his round moist knickers.

[whelk]

Fuckers that bang on about concussion in football like they are insightful crusaders 

[whelk]

2 hours ago, Turkish said:

The guy that delivers our Gusto on a sunday morning is an absolute bellend, always wants to stop and chat about his holiday to Turkey or what woman he is flirting with on the delivery round. He's a bald, skinny tattooed man from wakefield who looks like he should be sitting in a wetherspoons all day rather than giving the women on his round moist knickers.

You must be giving out signals 

[trousers]

Cocky contestants on MasterChef who way undercook their lamb/duck/chicken having defied the judges' earlier observation that they're leaving it too late to start cooking it. 

Every. F***ing. Time. 

Twats.

Edited 4 December, 2022 by trousers

[AlexLaw76]

2 minutes ago, trousers said:

Cocky contestants on MasterChef who way undercook their lamb/duck/chicken having defied the judges' earlier observation that they're leaving it too late to start cooking it. 

Every. F***ing. Time. 

Twats.

I watched a couple of episodes on iPlayer yesterday and this very thing struck me.  Certainly in the skills test, when they are asked "have you cooked pigeon before", respond with '"lots" to then screw it all up 🤣

[trousers]

'Celebrities' that go on Richard Osmond's House of Games, proclaim at the start that they are rubbish at quizzes, have never watched the programme before, and then sit there for the rest of the week like a plum before collecting their pay cheque having answered the sum total of two and a half questions correctly. (All whilst trying to be amusing about how shite they are ad-nauseum throughout all 5 episodes).

Twats. 

(Some presenter woman called Esme off something called 'Sewing Bee' is this week's total wazzock)

Edited 5 December, 2022 by trousers

[sadoldgit]

I received several emails from William Hill today thanking me for signing up to their online gambling site and offering some free bets. Only I didn’t sign up and I don’t gamble! They even quoted a user name which I am supposed to have chosen. Either it is a scam or some very dodgy marketing practice. F*ckers!

[AlexLaw76]

The endless roadworks on the M27. How can this till be a thing, about 3 years after it started?

huge chunks were closed last night, including an entire junction. This is then coupled with more roadworks on the Southampton end of the M3!

 

Edited 6 December, 2022 by AlexLaw76

[Lighthouse]

When supermarkets don't have decent bananas at the right level of ripeness. I don't know why but that annoys me more than anything else being out of stock.

[SotonianWill]

people referring to themselves and saints as scum is incredibly cringeworthy to me

[badgerx16]

The standard of journalism on the BBC news web is becoming more tabloid and sensational in the language used.

For instance, in today's coverage of people falling through the ice on a lake in Solihull the report says that temperatures will 'plummet' from 1C to -3C. That is a drop but hardly "plummeting".

 

[AlexLaw76]

Farmer Christmas - every bloody break it seems

[Weston Super Saint]

11 minutes ago, badgerx16 said:

The standard of journalism on the BBC news web is becoming more tabloid and sensational in the language used.

For instance, in today's coverage of people falling through the ice on a lake in Solihull the report says that temperatures will 'plummet' from 1C to -3C. That is a drop but hardly "plummeting".

 

Not sure there's any definition regarding the size of the 'plummet'....

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/plummet

Quote

Temperatures plummeted last night.

 

[badgerx16]

Just now, Weston Super Saint said:

Not sure there's any definition regarding the size of the 'plummet'....

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/plummet

 

Would they claim the temperature had plummetted if it dropped from 24C to 20C ?

[Weston Super Saint]

45 minutes ago, badgerx16 said:

Would they claim the temperature had plummetted if it dropped from 24C to 20C ?

I would claim it plummeted from 20 to 16 in my house, if that helps...

[Turkish]

Greg Wallace - such a cockwomble 

[Saint in Paradise]

Sick sorry and tired of all the crap ref Harry and Sparkle that appear in on-line editions of so called UK "newspapers"

I suspect the actual print versions are just as bad?

[whelk]

13 hours ago, Weston Super Saint said:

I would claim it plummeted from 20 to 16 in my house, if that helps...

That’s no plummet

[whelk]

9 hours ago, Turkish said:

Greg Wallace - such a cockwomble 

It’s ‘Gregg’. He loves to correct people and once did to a child with cancer who asked for a shout out or something and he replied with no acknowledgement just correcting her on using one ‘g’

[Sheaf Saint]

2 hours ago, whelk said:

It’s ‘Gregg’. He loves to correct people and once did to a child with cancer who asked for a shout out or something and he replied with no acknowledgement just correcting her on using one ‘g’

[Turkish]

7 hours ago, Sheaf Saint said:

 

9 hours ago, whelk said:

It’s ‘Gregg’. He loves to correct people and once did to a child with cancer who asked for a shout out or something and he replied with no acknowledgement just correcting her on using one ‘g’

I believe he once described himself as the cooking womens crumpet. Fuck off mate, you’re a fat, four eyed bald bloke in your 50s with crooked teeth, the only crumpet you are as a complete and utter one.

[AlexLaw76]

I know of someone who met both Greg and John Torrode.  John, who appears a bit more stand-offish on telly compared to his follically challenged mate, was apparently really great and spent loads of time having a laugh with those who met him, whilst greg was an utter cock

apparently

[whelk]

7 hours ago, Sheaf Saint said:

Mastertwat is great insult. Like something from The Thick of It

[Holmes_and_Watson]

On 12/12/2022 at 04:16, Saint in Paradise said:

Sick sorry and tired of all the crap ref Harry and Sparkle that appear in on-line editions of so called UK "newspapers"

I suspect the actual print versions are just as bad?

The quality of journalism has plummeted. 🙂

Edited 13 December, 2022 by Holmes_and_Watson

[Turkish]

Being sent a survey every time you do anything. For example I popped into the local Nat West to pay a small amount of cash into my account friday, got sent a survey this morning about how happy was i with the service,  What improvements could they make etc Get dozens of them, a charity fundraiser we did recently, what did you think of our challenge, you get a delivery, what did you think of our delivery driver, etc it's painful.

[whelk]

6 minutes ago, Turkish said:

Being sent a survey every time you do anything. For example I popped into the local Nat West to pay a small amount of cash into my account friday, got sent a survey this morning about how happy was i with the service,  What improvements could they make etc Get dozens of them, a charity fundraiser we did recently, what did you think of our challenge, you get a delivery, what did you think of our delivery driver, etc it's painful.

I think Saintweb should issue surveys to anyone who likes, laughs at etc. a post. 
 

tell us why you liked it? Would you talk about it outside of Saintsweb? Is the poster generally a bit of a cunt?

[Turkish]

11 minutes ago, whelk said:

I think Saintweb should issue surveys to anyone who likes, laughs at etc. a post. 
 

tell us why you liked it? Would you talk about it outside of Saintsweb? Is the poster generally a bit of a cunt?

what is it you were confused about?

[Manuel]

Petit pois.  Why don't we call them "small peas"? 

[StDunko]

1 hour ago, Manuel said:

Petit pois.  Why don't we call them "small peas"? 

I'm with you on this.  Let's bin off 'courgette' too, 'little marrows' from now on. 

[The Cat]

On 12/12/2022 at 19:18, AlexLaw76 said:

I know of someone who met both Greg and John Torrode.  John, who appears a bit more stand-offish on telly compared to his follically challenged mate, was apparently really great and spent loads of time having a laugh with those who met him, whilst greg was an utter cock

apparently

I know someone who has worked on MasterChef and they apparently fell out big time to the point where a lot of the conversations between them were filmed separately.

No idea if this is still the case, was a good while ago I heard that.

[The Cat]

On 13/12/2022 at 10:10, Turkish said:

Being sent a survey every time you do anything. For example I popped into the local Nat West to pay a small amount of cash into my account friday, got sent a survey this morning about how happy was i with the service,  What improvements could they make etc Get dozens of them, a charity fundraiser we did recently, what did you think of our challenge, you get a delivery, what did you think of our delivery driver, etc it's painful.

Annoys me when you get them at work.

I told you something was broken and you fixed it by doing your job. I don't want to fill out a survey to rate the service thank you.