The small things in life that annoy you

[Fan The Flames]

I've moaned about this before, but it gets my goat. Waiting at a box junction for the lane ahead to clear. It starts to clear and the cunt waiting in the lane next to you crosses over and nicks your space. Then if they are a double cunt they hold you up later on, as they try to get back into their original lane.

[whelk]

Black fucking Friday

[badgerx16]

1 hour ago, whelk said:

Black fucking Friday

It wouldn't be so bad if it was just Friday.

[whelk]

Bielsa interviews

[Lighthouse]

Fog lights. If they were any brighter driving home tonight I’d need sun cream.

[badgerx16]

1 hour ago, Lighthouse said:

Fog lights. If they were any brighter driving home tonight I’d need sun cream.

People who don't know when to use them, and when not to.

[Toadhall Saint]

15 hours ago, badgerx16 said:

People who don't know when to use them, and when not to.

Yep and full beam in fog 

[cloggy saint]

People (men) that wear shorts when it's fucking freezing. I can only assume it's a 'look how hard I am, I don't feel the cold' statement.

[badgerx16]

1 hour ago, cloggy saint said:

People (men) that wear shorts when it's fucking freezing. I can only assume it's a 'look how hard I am, I don't feel the cold' statement.

My 28 year old son has to practically be bullied into wearing long trousers when he is not at work.

Edited 21 December, 2021 by badgerx16

[cloggy saint]

One of my neighbours, who is king of the chavs wears shorts all year round. If it's especially cold he'll wear long-johns, with shorts over the top  

[whelk]

1 hour ago, cloggy saint said:

One of my neighbours, who is king of the chavs wears shorts all year round. If it's especially cold he'll wear long-johns, with shorts over the top  

Does he keep engines on his front lawn?

[cloggy saint]

1 hour ago, whelk said:

Does he keep engines on his front lawn?

Not yet, but both him and his dad have pikey cars with chav-canon exhausts that you can hear coming from about 5 miles away.

Edited 21 December, 2021 by cloggy saint
can't spell

[The Cat]

7 hours ago, cloggy saint said:

People (men) that wear shorts when it's fucking freezing. I can only assume it's a 'look how hard I am, I don't feel the cold' statement.

There's a guy near us who I call Mr Shorts because he always has them on. Drops his kids at school and walks the dog across the country park in shorts even at sub zero temperatures.

He always walks the dog with Mrs Yellow Coat who is the parent to other kids at the school. Obviously I've decided they are having an affair solely based on the fact they walk dogs together.

There's another dad who used to turn up in the depths of winter in suitable body clothing while wearing flip flops. What a prick.

[badgerx16]

1 hour ago, The Cat said:

There's a guy near us who I call Mr Shorts because he always has them on. Drops his kids at school and walks the dog across the country park in shorts even at sub zero temperatures.

He always walks the dog with Mrs Yellow Coat who is the parent to other kids at the school. Obviously I've decided they are having an affair solely based on the fact they walk dogs together.

They're probably just dogging.

[stknowle]

1 hour ago, The Cat said:

There's a guy near us who I call Mr Shorts because he always has them on. Drops his kids at school and walks the dog across the country park in shorts even at sub zero temperatures.

He always walks the dog with Mrs Yellow Coat who is the parent to other kids at the school. Obviously I've decided they are having an affair solely based on the fact they walk dogs together.

There's another dad who used to turn up in the depths of winter in suitable body clothing while wearing flip flops. What a prick.

You ever seen someone in a shop (generally local) in their DRESSING GOWN? I have and it stunned me.

[The Cat]

1 minute ago, stknowle said:

You ever seen someone in a shop (generally local) in their DRESSING GOWN? I have and it stunned me.

Yeah. I worked in a co-op for a while during what you could categorise as "peak onesie era" and would it wasn't uncommon to see people wearing them, dressing gowns, slippers etc on weekend mornings.

[badgerx16]

The current TV advert for The Vegetarian Butcher:

#1 if you don't slice meat you ain't a butcher

#2 you can't have Teriyaki Chicken if it doesn't contain chicken

#3 ditto 'meaty' pies

[skintsaint]

People who think its a challenge and keep updating social media to do a 'Dry January'. Its not that hard to give up for a month ffs.

I mean, we are 19 days in and I still haven't had a bath or shower.

[Turkish]

3 minutes ago, skintsaint said:

People who think its a challenge and keep updating social media to do a 'Dry January'. Its not that hard to give up for a month ffs.

I mean, we are 19 days in and I still haven't had a bath or shower.

If people think it’s an achievement not to drink for a month then they have a drinking issue. 
 

I get sick of the constant sponsorship requests on social media. Although I saw one this week which was new depths of nauseating. A women in her early thirties, perfectly healthy asking people to sponsor her February fitness month challenge. “20 minutes of fitness a day every day for the whole of February this included walking, swimming, yoga or cycling” Jesus wept, wanting people to give money to go for a 20 minute walk every day. 

[badgerx16]

Advert breaks during weekday daytime TV: it's all life insurance, funeral plans, burglar alarms, and equity release.

[Lighthouse]

1 hour ago, badgerx16 said:

Advert breaks during weekday daytime TV: it's all life insurance, funeral plans, burglar alarms, and equity release.

Don’t forget the floppy willies.

[Turkish]

11 minutes ago, Lighthouse said:

Don’t forget the floppy willies.

i seem to be getting an ever increasing amount of email adverts to my hotmail around viagra, erectile disfunction and one from a email address "huge manhood" which tells me long kept German secrets of penis elongation. Make of that what you will.

[whelk]

4 hours ago, Turkish said:

If people think it’s an achievement not to drink for a month then they have a drinking issue. 
 

I get sick of the constant sponsorship requests on social media. Although I saw one this week which was new depths of nauseating. A women in her early thirties, perfectly healthy asking people to sponsor her February fitness month challenge. “20 minutes of fitness a day every day for the whole of February this included walking, swimming, yoga or cycling” Jesus wept, wanting people to give money to go for a 20 minute walk every day. 

Yeah sponsorship for a 5k run. I get not everyone may think simple but just donate direct not thinking wow you have done a Park Run!

[Turkish]

1 hour ago, whelk said:

Yeah sponsorship for a 5k run. I get not everyone may think simple but just donate direct not thinking wow you have done a Park Run!

Then there is the other end of the scale. I'm climbing Kilimanjaro to raise money for charity. No you're not, you're doing it because you want to climb Kilimanjaro because it's a pretty cool thing to do for a holiday.

[Turkish]

Just did a 31 minute walk, sponsor me?

[Whitey Grandad]

1 hour ago, Turkish said:

Just did a 31 minute walk, sponsor me?

I just did 32 minutes. Surely I'm more worthy?

[Turkish]

20 minutes ago, Whitey Grandad said:

I just did 32 minutes. Surely I'm more worthy?

Set up a go fund me page and away you go.

[badgerx16]

5 hours ago, Lighthouse said:

Don’t forget the floppy willies.

I was only referencing adverts targetted at me.

[Lighthouse]

That could be an interesting thread actually; what would you donate £100 to charity for someone to do? Obviously for a decent chunk of dough like that, it’d have to be something impressive and unusual.

[whelk]

I have gone a whole day without calling anyone a c**t on Saintsweb. £5 anyone?

[Weston Super Saint]

2 minutes ago, whelk said:

I have gone a whole day without calling anyone a c**t on Saintsweb. £5 anyone?

Yes please, are you paying cash or bank transfer?

[whelk]

9 minutes ago, Weston Super Saint said:

Yes please, are you paying cash or bank transfer?

Send me your card number and the cvv code and I will send it over.

[cloggy saint]

Footballers who get called 'Big'. Big Dunc, Big Virgil, Big Fraser. It's so f**king lame and unimaginative.

[badgerx16]

"Organic" fruit and vegetables.

Certain produce may have been cultivated in an "environmentally friendly" way, but biochemically ALL fruit and veg are organic by definition.

[Manuel]

#bekind.  Rubbish!  Being kind never got anyone anywhere.  Tell the truth and say it how it is. 

[Sheaf Saint]

On 21/01/2022 at 19:19, badgerx16 said:

"Organic" fruit and vegetables.

Certain produce may have been cultivated in an "environmentally friendly" way, but biochemically ALL fruit and veg are organic by definition.

And on that note... 

Nothing organic about salt. 

[Fan The Flames]

When contributors on a BBC programme mention a brand name then follow it up with "other x's are available". This stopped being mildly amusing back in the 1990's.

[cloggy saint]

The over use of 'to be fair'. It gets trotted out all the f**king time and mostly the user is neither being fair nor unfair, just making a statement.

[trousers]

1 minute ago, cloggy saint said:

The over use of 'to be fair'. It gets trotted out all the f**king time and mostly the user is neither being fair nor unfair, just making a statement.

That's a good point to be fair.

(Other witty retorts are available)

Edited 31 January, 2022 by trousers

[Weston Super Saint]

People who are incapable of speeding up when the join the motorway.

[badgerx16]

1 hour ago, Weston Super Saint said:

People who are incapable of speeding up when the join the motorway.

You do understand that 70mph is not a mandatory minimum speed ?

[Whitey Grandad]

30 minutes ago, badgerx16 said:

You do understand that 70mph is not a mandatory minimum speed ?

That’s not relevant. The Highway Code is quite clear about joining the motorway. You should match your speed to the traffic that you’re joining before moving across to join them.

Whether that traffic is doing 50mph or 70mph the method is the same. I regularly see joiners who seem to think that they have right of way and don’t adjust their own speed in order to blend in smoothly.

[badgerx16]

21 minutes ago, Whitey Grandad said:

That’s not relevant. The Highway Code is quite clear about joining the motorway. You should match your speed to the traffic that you’re joining before moving across to join them.

Whether that traffic is doing 50mph or 70mph the method is the same. I regularly see joiners who seem to think that they have right of way and don’t adjust their own speed in order to blend in smoothly.

I am well aware of the Highway Code and the etiquette of motorway driving, thankyou. It was a jibe at WSS !

[Whitey Grandad]

32 minutes ago, badgerx16 said:

I am well aware of the Highway Code and the etiquette of motorway driving, thankyou. It was a jibe at WSS !

Point taken. 
 

My post was not particularly aimed at you but at the wider audience* out there. Not that the sorts of people who don’t look across at motorways would ever read this thread.

* ‘audience’ is not the right word for an Internet forum. I suppose ‘readership’ would be better.

[Weston Super Saint]

4 hours ago, badgerx16 said:

You do understand that 70mph is not a mandatory minimum speed ?

Yes.

As Whitey has already pointed out but perhaps to re-inforce : https://www.drivingtestsuccess.com/blog/how-join-motorway

Quote

Things to remember when joining the motorway:

• Give priority to traffic on the motorway.
• Assess and adjust your speed to match traffic already on the motorway.

 

Edited 13 February, 2022 by Weston Super Saint

[badgerx16]

6 minutes ago, Weston Super Saint said:

Yes.

Jolly good, many don't.

[Lighthouse]

Waking up bursting for a p*ss but you can’t go because you’ve got a massive horn.

[Fan The Flames]

The people who wait for the train ticket gate to completly close before putting their ticket in. 

[Holmes_and_Watson]

7 minutes ago, Fan The Flames said:

The people who wait for the train ticket gate to completly close before putting their ticket in. 

Oh noes! I might do that...

because...um... by waiting for the mechanism to complete its full cycle, I'm preventing it jerking open and increasing wear and tear. So, over years I'm saving us all maintenance money casuing price rises? No? Rats...I'm just being annoying then... 🙂

[kyle04]

People trying to get through the Itchen bridge toll by waving their credit card at the monitor, for 10 minutes, before pressing for assistance, then fumbling for change, for another 10 minutes, by which time I've nearly run out of petrol.