Wife taking your surname when married

[Saintandy666]

Oh darn it. I'm getting married next year so I better tell my wife that we are participating in the continuation of the oppression of women. And here I was under the mistaken impression that we loved each other and wanted to express that publicly and make a commitment to each other. Thank goodness that more enlightened individuals such as yourself are moving away from such outdated practices as marriage.

 

I said earlier it doesn't matter either way to me which way people go (which is why I said it is symbolic of) - but just saying that the roots of the tradition are from the idea of a husband 'owning' their wives.

[hypochondriac]

Darn it? Lol

I refer everyone to the 1st sentence of the 2nd post:

http://www.saintsweb.co.uk/showthread.php?53719-What-are-you-like-in-real-life#.VQn_G-geK2c

 

Sarcasm is a concept lost on you Jonnyboy. Your replies remind me of when I try to talk to my cat and he looks at me as if he almost understands what I'm saying.

[hypochondriac]

I said earlier it doesn't matter either way to me which way people go (which is why I said it is symbolic of) - but just saying that the roots of the tradition are from the idea of a husband 'owning' their wives.

 

It clearly isn't the reason people do it now though so I don't see why it's relevant to a discussion about marriage and surnames in the 21st century.

[Saintandy666]

It clearly isn't the reason people do it now though so I don't see why it's relevant to a discussion about marriage and surnames in the 21st century.

 

Not consciously no, but I think there's wider symbolism in language and traditions like this, and I think stuff like this does matter if full and total equality is to be reached - i.e the way in which language can be male-biased, but I'm sure I'll get laughed down at this point. Congratulations for your marriage next year by the way!

[whelk]

The Cat, you are pretty damn cool, it's got to be said.

 

FFS what is becoming of this place?

[whelk]

It's a symbolic part of a larger historical oppression of women though that we are now slowly moving on from. Culture changes and is variable, as I'm sure you know. I'm sure partnerships will survive people not opting into this tradition.

 

Blimey mate. Ever thought of getting out and enjoying rather than analysing?

[whelk]

Hi Whelk,

 

As I said, I didn't mean it to come out as strong as it looked. I was intended to be jokey.

 

Thanks.

 

You are too nice for this place. Stop being do forgiving;-)

[pap]

What's prompted the question, Hypo? Future-wife refusing to take on the moniker?

 

"I love you, darling hypo, but I do not wish to be Mrs Shufflebottom"

[SNSUN]

I don't have much legacy in this life, my name is one. My wife wanted to go double barrelled, I put my foot down. It's a normal surname anyway, nothing rude.

[Hamilton Saint]

Sarcasm is a concept lost on you Jonnyboy. Your replies remind me of when I try to talk to my cat and he looks at me as if he almost understands what I'm saying.

 

I've had a cat before; now I have a dog.

 

And this is my favourite Gary Larson cartoon.

[Golden Balls]

I'm not hugely proud of my surname as I wasn't close to my dad's side of the family and it's not a great sounding name either. However I wouldn't get married if the gf didn't take my name. Purely because I see it as being a family and a coming together. Plus the children having the same name as both parents.

That said, her surname is brilliant and would go with my first name much better than my current surname. I just couldn't handle the shame and ridicule if I took her name.

[Bearsy]

Balls?

[simo]

I nearly got married twice , each time my name was all I had left afterwards