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The TMS Blagwatch Thread


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They say crime doesn't pay. It does, of course. They just say that to try to deter people from doing it. As someone that lives in the stereotypically crime-ridden dystopia of Liverpool (it's lovely mostly, but for the purposes of the thread, stay with me) I am often amused and enlivened by dastardly tales of the criminal's low wit trumping the best laid plans of our corporate masters (and bow, we do, to them).

 

An example can be found in today's Liverpool Echo.

 

Apparently, the Ellesmere Port choring crew have found an interesting way to avoid the security tag detectors when nicking DVDs. The British postage system and ASDA's continual efforts to bring people into their store. "Hey! You can post your letters in-store!"

 

What can possibly go wrong? :)

 

http://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/news/liverpool-news/asda-criminals-steal-dvds-posting-8526826

 

The TMS Blagwatch Thread.

 

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Many years ago I had a mate who worked in a large department store, he knew a couple of members of staff, one who worked in electrical goods and another who worked in dispatch. Between them they would get you anything you wanted (new TV, Hoover, Microwave etc.) delivered to your house. The bloke in electricals would just take the item requested to his mate in dispatch and get it packed and labelled with your address and then it would be sent out and documented with other legitimate deliveries.

 

Whenever there were stock takes the management could not understand how such large items were getting shoplifted past the store's security guards.

 

Whenever

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I used to know someone who worked in a popular clothing store. Whilst working in the stock room they would put several items on under what they were wearing (they made a note of what you were wearing before going in and out of the stock room). I was met them in the pub after work and they had 3 pairs of jeans on :lol:

 

Said friend was eventually caught and sacked. They got a bit cocky at getting away with this for a while, so started placing large amounts of items in bin bags with rubbish and then coming back at night to get the bags out of the bins. They didn't realise the bins were in sight of the CCTV :facepalm:

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A WOMAN come round to MY PLACE OF WORK before CHRISTMAS saying sob story bout her husband had RUN OFF & she CAN'T AFFORD FOOD for her CHILDREN so she had just been to TESCO and walked out with a brand new DYSON VACUUM CLEANER which she SHOPLIFTED and did we want to BUY IT off her for £60?

 

ACCOUNTS LADY in my OFFICE bought it off her and even gave her an EXTRA £20 because of SOB STORY but then later when she got home and opened the box all that was in it was SOME BRICKS, bubble-wrap and a BROKEN KETTLE :lol::lol::lol::lol:

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A WOMAN come round to MY PLACE OF WORK before CHRISTMAS saying sob story bout her husband had RUN OFF & she CAN'T AFFORD FOOD for her CHILDREN so she had just been to TESCO and walked out with a brand new DYSON VACUUM CLEANER which she SHOPLIFTED and did we want to BUY IT off her for £60?

 

ACCOUNTS LADY in my OFFICE bought it off her and even gave her an EXTRA £20 because of SOB STORY but then later when she got home and opened the box all that was in it was SOME BRICKS, bubble-wrap and a BROKEN KETTLE :lol::lol::lol::lol:

 

Y'see, that was always the benefit of the bin bag sales they used to have in illegal pub lock-ins back in the '90s.

 

Those bricks would have burst the bottom of the bin bag before you can say "vacuum-cleaner-less bin-bag".

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I told ACCOUNTS LADY she should send it back to DYSON because of 2YR WARRANTY :thumbup: I should have liked to see their face :lol:

They probably have a return code ready to go, Bear. This is not the first time I have heard bricks used as a substitute for supposedly bargain buys. It's probably why we have a housing crisis, and just another reason to adopt Gary Neville's stance of living like a Teletubbie if we want any way out of it.

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