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Luke Shaw article

The Hole

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Coldridge

Coldridge

Posted
Posted
Unbelievably talented but thick as ****.

 

The end

 

To elaborate on that, he will be the LB equivalent of Rooney. He will be very good, but his lack of intelligence will prevent him from ever truly being world class. Many will be confused by this because as far as the eye can see, he's got everything in his locker to be up there with the best but somehow fails to deliver.

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Bearsy

Bearsy

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Posted

LUKE SHAW: Southampton, England and Man Utd

 

At Southampton, we always know we have a player on our hands when Chelsea try to buy his fetus. Such it was with Luke Shaw. He looked the part from the moment he stepped onto the St. Mary's turf, and we have the highest opinion of him. We think he has the quality to play Champions League football (but I guess we'll never know :lol:). Here we address the most common criticisms thrown his way:

 

fat_ass-1.jpg

 

Luke Shaw Is Defensive Liability

 

I hear this said every now and then, and for me it’s just a dumb cliché people always say about teenage defenders. I’ve seen bad defenders (we gave Danny Fox 23 Premier League starts!) and Luke Shaw is nothing of the sort. His positioning is perfectly fine, he doesn’t get beaten one-on-one, he doesn’t give the ball away in dangerous positions. If occasionally he gets caught up field when the opposition counter attack, that’s just the inevitable trade off of playing wing-back, and he always busts a gut to get back.

 

Notwithstanding, his defensive responsibilities are less critical in the United team when titans like Smalling and Jones are covering :)

 

Luke Shaw Is Well Fat

 

When Luke Shaw broke into the first team the Southampton fans immediately noted that he had the fat arse of a middle-aged black woman. It’s not clear if he gained an ample rump through genetic heritage or excessive fried chicken, but it has always been there, stretching out his shorts.

 

Accusations of poor fitness however came as a surprise to us, especially from a squad that has Wayne Rooney as it’s captain. Luke Shaw does not lack pace, or stamina or strength. Quite the opposite, to haul an arse like that up and down the left flank for 90 minutes as I have often seen him do, takes a near herculean effort of supreme fitness! I should love to see Luke Shaw vs Wayne Rooney running a beep test or whatever.

 

Luke Shaw Is Well Thick

 

That Luke Shaw has a reputation for stupidity amongst his peers, considering his peers are Premier League footballers, is alarming. In his time at Southampton we never found out the full extent of his retardation, but to walk into a Premier League changing room and be introduced as “the thick one” is a remarkable achievement.

 

I am not however completely convinced that Luke Shaw is any more stupid than the next left back. I rather suspect that he is just not widely educated. If you asked Luke Shaw the capital of Nicaragua no doubt he would blushingly decline, hell, if you asked him the Prime Minister of England I’d only give you 50/50 odds, but these are not the areas of his expertise. They are of no interest to him. If you asked Luke how to force Aaron Lennon onto his left foot, or how long it takes to eat a Nando’s Jumbo Platter he would no doubt give you a more positive answer.

 

Whatever the truth, it seems unlikely to impact on his football career. That Luke Shaw is not wandering around the pitch contemplating the impact of post-soviet oligarchic venality on Crimean political stability, ought not to prevent him passing the ball to Wayne Rooney.

 

Luke Shaw Is Flatter To Deceive

 

Ah, here you have me. While I find his defensive abilities fully formed, he has always been the attacking third’s nearly man. He’s got the skills, he’s got the pace, the ability to beat a man, a left foot capable of terrific delivery, but he’s never quite put it together.

 

This will come, I reckon. Leighton Baines didn’t score a Premier League goal until he was 22 and he’s now the World’s Greatest Attacking Evar Left Back, or something. For the time being, Luke Shaw’s attacking contribution must remain metaphorical. Like Rooney’s hair.

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Jesus Reigned

Jesus Reigned

Posted
Posted
LUKE SHAW: Southampton, England and Man Utd

 

At Southampton, we always know we have a player on our hands when Chelsea try to buy his fetus. Such it was with Luke Shaw. He looked the part from the moment he stepped onto the St. Mary's turf, and we have the highest opinion of him. We think he has the quality to play Champions League football (but I guess we'll never know :lol:). Here we address the most common criticisms thrown his way:

 

fat_ass-1.jpg

 

Luke Shaw Is Defensive Liability

 

I hear this said every now and then, and for me it’s just a dumb cliché people always say about teenage defenders. I’ve seen bad defenders (we gave Danny Fox 23 Premier League starts!) and Luke Shaw is nothing of the sort. His positioning is perfectly fine, he doesn’t get beaten one-on-one, he doesn’t give the ball away in dangerous positions. If occasionally he gets caught up field when the opposition counter attack, that’s just the inevitable trade off of playing wing-back, and he always busts a gut to get back.

 

Notwithstanding, his defensive responsibilities are less critical in the United team when titans like Smalling and Jones are covering :)

 

Luke Shaw Is Well Fat

 

When Luke Shaw broke into the first team the Southampton fans immediately noted that he had the fat arse of a middle-aged black woman. It’s not clear if he gained an ample rump through genetic heritage or excessive fried chicken, but it has always been there, stretching out his shorts.

 

Accusations of poor fitness however came as a surprise to us, especially from a squad that has Wayne Rooney as it’s captain. Luke Shaw does not lack pace, or stamina or strength. Quite the opposite, to haul an arse like that up and down the left flank for 90 minutes as I have often seen him do, takes a near herculean effort of supreme fitness! I should love to see Luke Shaw vs Wayne Rooney running a beep test or whatever.

 

Luke Shaw Is Well Thick

 

That Luke Shaw has a reputation for stupidity amongst his peers, considering his peers are Premier League footballers, is alarming. In his time at Southampton we never found out the full extent of his retardation, but to walk into a Premier League changing room and be introduced as “the thick one” is a remarkable achievement.

 

I am not however completely convinced that Luke Shaw is any more stupid than the next left back. I rather suspect that he is just not widely educated. If you asked Luke Shaw the capital of Nicaragua no doubt he would blushingly decline, hell, if you asked him the Prime Minister of England I’d only give you 50/50 odds, but these are not the areas of his expertise. They are of no interest to him. If you asked Luke how to force Aaron Lennon onto his left foot, or how long it takes to eat a Nando’s Jumbo Platter he would no doubt give you a more positive answer.

 

Whatever the truth, it seems unlikely to impact on his football career. That Luke Shaw is not wandering around the pitch contemplating the impact of post-soviet oligarchic venality on Crimean political stability, ought not to prevent him passing the ball to Wayne Rooney.

 

Luke Shaw Is Flatter To Deceive

 

Ah, here you have me. While I find his defensive abilities fully formed, he has always been the attacking third’s nearly man. He’s got the skills, he’s got the pace, the ability to beat a man, a left foot capable of terrific delivery, but he’s never quite put it together.

 

This will come, I reckon. Leighton Baines didn’t score a Premier League goal until he was 22 and he’s now the World’s Greatest Attacking Evar Left Back, or something. For the time being, Luke Shaw’s attacking contribution must remain metaphorical. Like Rooney’s hair.

 

Brilliant; very funny and yet informative and entirely accurate at the same time.

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simo

simo

Posted
Posted
He was by far the best left back in the country last season, but who knows if he will push on. I think the strict routine at Man U will see him straight! :)

 

I've said it time and time again for an "attacking" full back 0 goals and 0 assists is poor!

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Professor

Professor

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Posted
He was by far the best left back in the country last season, but who knows if he will push on. I think the strict routine at Man U will see him straight! :)

Not an opinion shared by the England manager, who chose him as second best English LB. Although its fashionable to decry the England manager, whoever he is, Roy Hodgson probably knows more about football than your average fan. Not only was Shaw second choice to Baines it was also doubtful if he was better than Ashley Cole who lost out on the England place for lack of games due there being an even better LB at Chelsea. That would seem to put at least 3 LBs in the frame to be as good as Shaw. Southampton have also borrowed quite a good one in Bertrand.

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Saintandy666

Saintandy666

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Posted
Lives on Nandos

 

I saw him in Nandos once. Bizarrely I managed to get into the queue inbetween each half of what was then the Saints youth team. JWP was on one side of me and LS on another plus I think CC?? The only one I really remember from it is LS though as he seemed very loud and arrogant but that's just youth sport - a lot of arrogance around. Maybe he has calmed a bit now.

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suewhistle

suewhistle

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Posted
Accusations of poor fitness however came as a surprise to us, especially from a squad that has Wayne Rooney as it’s captain.

 

One of many accurate observations, Bearsy. Perhaps after he got his dream move he let himself go? Maybe that's why Welbeck looked so fit: he wanted to get out of Man Utd?

 

Anyway, I think the OP should have a few gems by now..A bit of cut n paste and they've got themselves an article..

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Saint Garrett

Saint Garrett

Posted
Posted

He's rubbish, we'll take him back for 15m in January!

 

On a serious note, surprised how many pundits and fans say he's crap defensively, he's absolutely brilliant defensively IMO. Only one who comes close is Ashley Cole. Amount of times you see him somehow manage to get in front of his man when he has someone running at him is ridiculous.

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Batman

Batman

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Posted
Delldays quote was that Luke Shaw was the best left back in the Premiership last season. I am struggling to find much evidence of that (as good as Luke clearly was).

 

My quote was that his fellow pros, who should know a thing or two voted him the best

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simo

simo

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Posted
He's rubbish, we'll take him back for 15m in January!

 

On a serious note, surprised how many pundits and fans say he's crap defensively, he's absolutely brilliant defensively IMO. Only one who comes close is Ashley Cole. Amount of times you see him somehow manage to get in front of his man when he has someone running at him is ridiculous.

 

Only if he was running from our side of the halfway line if he was in the opposition half he never bothered

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sadoldgit

sadoldgit

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Posted

One more stat before I call it day. PPI points. Baines 542. Evra 487. Shaw 469.

Full backs are expected not just to defend nowdays but also to provide more attacking options and that is where Shaw falls down at the moment and why, in unbiased terms, her wasnt the best left back in the Premiership last season.

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Batman

Batman

Posted
Posted (edited)
One more stat before I call it day. PPI points. Baines 542. Evra 487. Shaw 469.

Full backs are expected not just to defend nowdays but also to provide more attacking options and that is where Shaw falls down at the moment and why, in unbiased terms, her wasnt the best left back in the Premiership last season.

 

Again, you want to say that to the actual pros who play the game. Not talk about it on message board

 

You are forever telling us managers know better when we question a team selection

 

Yet managers and pros are wrong now

 

My initial quote was further qualified by saying he was the best left back according to his fellow pros

 

According to stats, Carlton cole was a better striker last season than Shane long. Would you agree?

Edited by Batman
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