Your Zombie Apocalypse Survival Plan

[SuperMikey]

We've all thought about it, so what's yours?

 

I live and work in Portswood. My family (and my housemate's family) live in North Hampshire. First objective is to reach them.

 

- Go to my workplace (local shop) and load up on supplies. Find a warehouse/easily defensible building to hole up in for a day or two.

- Find weapons (already have the intel on where to get them). Leave the city and head towards our families.

- Upon finding our families, rally two or 3 vehicles and head north to Scotland.

- I have family in a remote part of Scotland. The property we would be heading to is very easily defensible, not too far from food supplies (farms, small settlements with shops etc) and has access to weaponry.

- Hole up there for as long as possible then head to a remote Scottish island (have pinpointed the exact one, but for security reasons it will remain unnamed!).

- Survive.

 

I'm mildly obsessed with this idea, so have planned it a bit too thoroughly.

[Bearsy]

Oh I've got mine all figured out too!

- Become zombie

- Go to portswood

- Hide in warehouse/easily defensible building

- Wait for SuperMikey

- Eat SuperMikey

- Wait for someone to invent zombie cure

- Get cured of zombie

- Go home

- Do large SuperMikey shaped poo

[Griffo]

Go to the Winchester and wait for it to all blow over.

[SuperMikey]

Oh I've got mine all figured out too!

- Become zombie

- Go to portswood

- Hide in warehouse/easily defensible building

- Wait for SuperMikey

- Eat SuperMikey

- Wait for someone to invent zombie cure

- Get cured of zombie

- Go home

- Do large SuperMikey shaped poo

 

 

Catch me if you can.

 

(it's really not that difficult).

[pap]

If the Walking Dead has told us anything, it's that cities are a no-no.

 

In a pinch, I'd consider holing up here:-

 

http://www.williamsontunnels.co.uk/

 

First choice, up the M6, hide out in the Lake District. Find a defensible position and hole up.

 

I'm also rather keen on the idea of hammock camping. I believe some sort of elevated tent city would prove to be formidable base of operations for a zombie plague.

[Whitey Grandad]

The best place to hide a book is in a library. Put on your zombie makeup and go to Swindon. Nobody (dead or alive) will ever find you.

[dubai_phil]

The best place to hide a book is in a library. Put on your zombie makeup and go to Swindon. Nobody (dead or alive) will ever find you.

 

Why waste time with Make Up?

 

You don't need any

[hypochondriac]

Get T-dog bitten on the shoulder so he is more up for sacrificing himself. Get him to run at the zombies, acting as a distraction whilst you leg it behind him as the tear into the skin on his neck.

[stug76]

Oh I've got mine all figured out too!

- Become zombie

- Go to portswood

- Hide in warehouse/easily defensible building

- Wait for SuperMikey

- Eat SuperMikey

- Wait for someone to invent zombie cure

- Get cured of zombie

- Go home

- Do large SuperMikey shaped poo

 

 

I'm off to find Dawn from the office with Griffo

[hypochondriac]

Alternatively, get Laurie to have her baby in a basement. Realise that she is losing too much blood and decide to cut the baby out of her. Use a hunting knife and under no circumstances kill her before you have cut her open with no anaesthetic (because that makes sense.) once the baby is removed, get her son to shoot her in the head. Leave the body as a snack for the zombies.

[Miltonroader07]

I would go in a Zombie Group, just working out whether to go in a 4-4-2 or a 3-5-2

[pap]

I would go in a Zombie Group, just working out whether to go in a 4-4-2 or a 3-5-2

 

Zombies can get by without most major organs. The brain is not one of them.

[the stain]

I'd hide out on the main board for a while.

[dubai_phil]

I'd hide out on the main board for a while.

 

[Jonnyboy]

Alternatively, get Laurie to have her baby in a basement. Realise that she is losing too much blood and decide to cut the baby out of her. Use a hunting knife and under no circumstances kill her before you have cut her open with no anaesthetic (because that makes sense.) once the baby is removed, get her son to shoot her in the head. Leave the body as a snack for the zombies.

 

Why are you doing spoilers you utter cock?

[Colinjb]

1. Get 'nom'ed.

2. 'Nom' everyone else.

3. Do not get cured and therefore no guilt, just pure Zombie mong state forever. (Like the mindset of a tech fanboy, but more blood and 'nom'ing.)

[latter day saint]

We've all thought about it, so what's yours?

 

I live and work in Portswood. My family (and my housemate's family) live in North Hampshire. First objective is to reach them.

 

- Go to my workplace (local shop) and load up on supplies. Find a warehouse/easily defensible building to hole up in for a day or two.

- Find weapons (already have the intel on where to get them). Leave the city and head towards our families.

- Upon finding our families, rally two or 3 vehicles and head north to Scotland.

- I have family in a remote part of Scotland. The property we would be heading to is very easily defensible, not too far from food supplies (farms, small settlements with shops etc) and has access to weaponry.

- Hole up there for as long as possible then head to a remote Scottish island (have pinpointed the exact one, but for security reasons it will remain unnamed!).

- Survive.

 

I'm mildly obsessed with this idea, so have planned it a bit too thoroughly.

what i don't understand is why haven't you got supplies & weapons already,rather than waiting for it to kick off. its not like nobody else will have the idea to get supplies from the local shop & grab any weapons availible. we've all seen the films ffs

[Tokyo-Saint]

Ah but we don't all work there do we? Everyone knows that unless you work there, it is absolutely completely impossible to gain entry. Those places are full proof, especially in Portswood.

 

However, I am a bit confused with warehouse being easily defend-able buildings? Is Ikea part of a new Viking invasion? Are they going to build warehouses up and down the country and then land in longboats again? Someone better tell Delldays!

[Smirking_Saint]

Steal a boat, sail out to isle of wight, if it has been infected then live by the shore and just sail out at night, eat lots of fish.

 

Simples

 

On second thoughts I went there the other day, its already infected

[SuperMikey]

....don't question me.

[Tokyo-Saint]

....don't question me.

 

You need to work on your interview technique.

[SuperMikey]

You need to work on your interview technique.

 

 

My interview technique is pretty good actually, never not been hired after having a job interview.

 

So nyeh.

[SuperMikey]

what i don't understand is why haven't you got supplies & weapons already,rather than waiting for it to kick off. its not like nobody else will have the idea to get supplies from the local shop & grab any weapons availible. we've all seen the films ffs

 

 

1) Already have weapons for a temporary period, the procurement of more heavy-duty stuff would be to provide better defence for the future (depending on how long that lasts anyway).

2) True, but that's not the only option. There are other places to go to. My workplace would just be the first port of call for supplies.

[percy windham]

Why are you going to Scotland? The roads would be jammed and you'd run out of petrol. It's miles away you div. you haven't thought this through properly at all.

[Smirking_Saint]

My interview technique is pretty good actually, never not been hired after having a job interview.

 

So nyeh.

 

Supermikey - can I have a job please

 

Interviewer - have you ever delivered the echo before ?

 

Supermikey - no but I do already carry a manbag.

 

Interviwer - your hired, but youll not be on as much as saintandy666

[buctootim]

Why are you going to Scotland? The roads would be jammed and you'd run out of petrol. It's miles away you div. you haven't thought this through properly at all.

 

Plus its frigging bleak when you get there. Alright for two weeks in July with electricity, blankets and a supermarket. Long term survival stone age style on a Scottish Island erm no thanks. Supermikey hasnt really thought through why most of them are so empty already

[Convict Colony]

You amateurs are behind the 8 ball, I have been following the steps in readiness for years now and have been training to run forever after reading the below advice.

 

"What is the primary skill needed to survive a zombie invasion? An individual may practice superior marksmanship, wear the most fantastic home-built armor, and possess the best maps and equipment. However, if one can't run at least six miles without stopping, one is in a brief, flesh-rending world of hurt."

 

http://ww2.zombieinitiative.org/stayingalive

 

Forrest Gump would survive so Tokyo's and Bearsy have a chance

[Whitey Grandad]

Why waste time with Make Up?

 

You don't need any

 

No, well I don't of course but I was giving general advice for anyone on here who looks vaguely like a normal human being. Wasting my time, really.

[pap]

One thing I don't get is how easily humanity gets wiped out. Zombies have problems with even the simplest of tasks. Right now in Walking Dead, a horde of undead are being kept from their human prey by a prison fence. They have problems with doors, etc. I'm not sure that you have to live in a prison to be safe from the undead. Just secure one of those grand old empty buildings with loads of office space, close off all chokepoints to the upper floors, and zipline to the nearest Spar if you need groceries, etc.

[SNSUN]

I have the survival skills of a lemming. If we really were going to suffer a Zombie attack, I'd drive to the nearest Sixth Form college and knob the living **** out of as many young ladies as I could. Then wait to suffer the consequences, death by zombie sixth formers. (I I could squeeze a Maccy D's breakfast in, I would.)

[Huffton]

None of you lot have got a clue. Nip down Southampton docks, nick the Queen Mary, or whatever is in that day, sail off somewhere warm. Zombies can't swim. Simples.

[RonManager]

None of you lot have got a clue. Nip down Southampton docks, nick the Queen Mary, or whatever is in that day, sail off somewhere warm. Zombies can't swim. Simples.

Oh yes we can.

 

Oh what a giveaway

 

Arse.