View From The Top Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 I would also suggest that you should be prepared to feel tired for around the next decade. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bridge too far Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Blimey, good luck!! Seems there are a lot of us that are pretty close to have children on here!! And additional grandchildren! Good luck to all you soon-to-be dads and best wishes to the mothers too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ecuk268 Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Enjoy it while you can. They grow up incredibly fast. From when my nipper was about 6 till about 12, every weekend, rain or shine, saw us kicking a ball around on the Common or the park. When he eventually preferred doing it with his mates instead of me, I really missed it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minty Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Found this quite interesting actually, my wife and I will be starting a family next year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ecuk268 Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 The thing that really surprised me was how completely it changes your life. No matter how many friends or relatives you may have with kids you can still have no idea what it's like until it happens to you. I found the first 6 months a bit boring but, after that, it's fascinating watching them grow up. They're like little sponges soaking up knowledge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazlo78 Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Loads of good advice on here - the primary being the very sensible "don't listen to our advice, your baby is unique and you'll figure out what works for you". A little curiosity never harms, though, so respect for asking around! I did notice this one though: You don't set the routine, the baby does. Just when you think you've got the routine sorted, they switch it. And I can't underline enough how true that is IMHO. Try as you might, any structure or routine before they are 6 months is likely to be very temporary. For instance, the babies do "appetite leaps" (monthly-ish) where their appetite improves a lot. To do that they'll seek breast feeding constantly to stimulate further milk production and this can result in some quite long days (and nights!) for the mother. However, nothing is wrong per se, and it will settle a day or two later, when milk production has been upped and the baby is yet again able to satisfy it's appetite As for sleeping in the same room or separate rooms it's very much up to yourselves. Some reports suggest that it's best that the baby is in the same room as the parents to avoid SIDS - something about sensing the parent's breathing. However, it is imperative that the baby get's is own blanket as it will simply get too hot if sleeping under the same blanket/duvet as the parents. Our kids all slept between our pillows when just coming home from the hospital, and then soon afterwards in a little bed next to ours. After a year or two they sleep in their own rooms with no problems. As for bottles it's another huge argument. Formula has it's consequences and some try to steer clear of it. Pure breastfeeding however leaves the father a little out of the loop and puts a huge strain on the mother. A solution could be a breast pump for the mother, which gives the father an opportunity to bottle feed with the mother's milk instead of formula. It's also really, really neat if the missus is wearing a little thin and needs an evening with her girlfriends - no problem, as long as there is milk for the baby in the fridge. We've been quite happy about this solution - it simply offers flexibility and more opportunity for the father to participate. Oh, and if you really want to be great partner, then see if you can make that extra effort. Dirty nappies could be shared 50/50, but having surplus energy to take an extra nappy when it's not your turn can be a real booster for the missus. Giving a bottle at night might give her those extra hours of sleep that will give her a good day (the stressful days harm milk production, so it is in the interest of the whole family to keep the mother as rested and relaxed as possible). Even though you feel worn down and really don't fancy burping the baby or changing that nappy, try to muster the energy. At some point (1 day, 1 week, 1 year, 10 years?) it'll wear out, but we might as well start out with the best of intentions I'll give it one year, and you'll be re-reading this thread chuckling at all the advice that turned out to have no relevance for your particular baby - mine included obviously Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notnowcato Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 My 2nd is due in October, another son Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazlo78 Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 My 2nd is due in October, another son 3rd boy arrived just last month, so it's all very recent to me too. Amazing how much I had forgotten considering the older brothers are 5 and 3. I couldn't even remember how to hold a baby when the third arrived, but like the first two times it comes quite naturally... For the more adventurous parents, try looking at baby slings and baby hammocks. All of our children have slept exceptionally well in a hammock like this: It has the benefit of a more rounded shape that gives comfort for the baby while at the same time the baby is not in danger of developing a "favourite side" for sleeping which can result in a misshapen head (only if it is always the same side and for long periods of time - no worries! ). And when travelling in England we always get loads of comments for the baby slings, but given the appalling level of facilities for handicapped or prams/trolleys etc. in e.g. London, it really makes sense to carry the baby yourself. The strain is divided across back and shoulders while leaving the arms free. I've rarely tried myself as my wife insist on buying slings in brightly coloured cloth with flower patterns - it's a direct assault on my masculinity Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Durleyfos Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 My youngest (now 2 and a half) has always slept on his front! Wouldn't ever settle on his back so tried him on his front. Stuck his index finger in his mouth and went off like a light. Still sleeps like that to this day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
View From The Top Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 I genuinely pity folk who chose not to have kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergei Gotsmanov Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Give up booze now in case you have to drive to the hospital in the middle of the night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thedelldays Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 don't drop it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dibden Purlieu Saint Posted 30 August, 2012 Author Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Give up booze now in case you have to drive to the hospital in the middle of the night. I have, haven't drunk for a few weeks now... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
View From The Top Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 I have, haven't drunk for a few weeks now... Oh, giving birth is grim & you will feel totally helpless. Just accept that fact & it will be less stressful for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergei Gotsmanov Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 I have, haven't drunk for a few weeks now... I took Champagne in with me to the hospital. Thought we would both want a drink. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
latter day saint Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 don't drop it i nearly did in the operating room after the missus had her c section! luckily the trainee midwife next to me caught him with all the stress/emotion & after 3 days with little sleep or food i was totally drained & nearly passed out. half hour later i felt like i could run a marathon as i held him properly,watching all the fireworks going off round the Princess Anne ( born 5th Nov) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddog Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 My wife has just had a baby girl, cracking post, some really good advice. All i can say is being 3 weeks in, its tiring very tiring and my wife is breast feeding so can totally see what the others are say, your wife or partner will be tired and you do feel a little helpless at times as you cant help feed. All i can say is chip in a take the load with nappies, changing and winding to help out All in all though its the most amazing feeling in the world being a dad, nothing can prepare you for it, but its amazing and well worth it :-) Can anyone recommend a decent sling? I like the idea of this if we are nipping into a shop etc??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notnowcato Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 3rd boy arrived just last month, so it's all very recent to me too. Amazing how much I had forgotten considering the older brothers are 5 and 3. I couldn't even remember how to hold a baby when the third arrived, but like the first two times it comes quite naturally... Congratulations. I've not forgotten the broken sleep! Bring it on though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Bad Bob Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 I found the first 6 months a bit boring but, after that, it's fascinating watching them grow up. They're like little sponges soaking up knowledge. Yeah, that is so true, the first 6 months are the most boring, and then they start sitting up and moving around and destroying things with their "inquisitiveness" and you wish they hadn't. The ornaments in our house have been slowly getting higher and higher over the last couple of years, the twins act like a tag team, one distracts you with their cuteness and the other destroys things.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dimond Geezer Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 I mentioned this thread to Mrs Geezer, her top tip was don't bother with shop bought baby food. We used to cook-up extra with the sunday roast, liquidise it & freeze in ice-cube trays, defrosting as required. Everything went in, a bit of meat & all the veg. It was gobbled-up in an instant, on the rare occasions we did use the shop bought stuff, they hated it. They still love brocolli, sprouts etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
View From The Top Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 I mentioned this thread to Mrs Geezer, her top tip was don't bother with shop bought baby food. We used to cook-up extra with the sunday roast, liquidise it & freeze in ice-cube trays, defrosting as required. Everything went in, a bit of meat & all the veg. It was gobbled-up in an instant, on the rare occasions we did use the shop bought stuff, they hated it. They still love brocolli, sprouts etc. Totally. Only time we used shop bought was if we were travelling. Save a fortune as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buctootim Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Can anyone recommend a decent sling? I like the idea of this if we are nipping into a shop etc??? Baby Bjorn is great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
um pahars Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Blimey, good luck!! Seems there are a lot of us that are pretty close to have children on here!! Those dark January evenings have a lot to answer for!!! From memory I think I was celebrating stuffing Forest at their place!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
norwaysaint Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Loads of good advice on here - the primary being the very sensible "don't listen to our advice, your baby is unique and you'll figure out what works for you". A little curiosity never harms, though, so respect for asking around! I did notice this one though: And I can't underline enough how true that is IMHO. Try as you might, any structure or routine before they are 6 months is likely to be very temporary. For instance, the babies do "appetite leaps" (monthly-ish) where their appetite improves a lot. To do that they'll seek breast feeding constantly to stimulate further milk production and this can result in some quite long days (and nights!) for the mother. However, nothing is wrong per se, and it will settle a day or two later, when milk production has been upped and the baby is yet again able to satisfy it's appetite As for sleeping in the same room or separate rooms it's very much up to yourselves. Some reports suggest that it's best that the baby is in the same room as the parents to avoid SIDS - something about sensing the parent's breathing. However, it is imperative that the baby get's is own blanket as it will simply get too hot if sleeping under the same blanket/duvet as the parents. Our kids all slept between our pillows when just coming home from the hospital, and then soon afterwards in a little bed next to ours. After a year or two they sleep in their own rooms with no problems. As for bottles it's another huge argument. Formula has it's consequences and some try to steer clear of it. Pure breastfeeding however leaves the father a little out of the loop and puts a huge strain on the mother. A solution could be a breast pump for the mother, which gives the father an opportunity to bottle feed with the mother's milk instead of formula. It's also really, really neat if the missus is wearing a little thin and needs an evening with her girlfriends - no problem, as long as there is milk for the baby in the fridge. We've been quite happy about this solution - it simply offers flexibility and more opportunity for the father to participate. Oh, and if you really want to be great partner, then see if you can make that extra effort. Dirty nappies could be shared 50/50, but having surplus energy to take an extra nappy when it's not your turn can be a real booster for the missus. Giving a bottle at night might give her those extra hours of sleep that will give her a good day (the stressful days harm milk production, so it is in the interest of the whole family to keep the mother as rested and relaxed as possible). Even though you feel worn down and really don't fancy burping the baby or changing that nappy, try to muster the energy. At some point (1 day, 1 week, 1 year, 10 years?) it'll wear out, but we might as well start out with the best of intentions I'll give it one year, and you'll be re-reading this thread chuckling at all the advice that turned out to have no relevance for your particular baby - mine included obviously This was a great post. I nearly passed out at the birth of our second daughter. I was mopping Mrs Norwaysaint's brow, while one of the midwives was holding a damp cloth over my forehead. Childbirth is the most emotionally draining thing I've ever been through, I was shattered afterwards, God only knows what it's like for women. As far as slings and things go, there are a lot of types out there and it's a case of finding what suits you. Ours spent a lot of time in a Babybjørn, it's really bonding to wear your baby, it's one of the best ways for a dad to make a connection. Most can only be used after the baby has developed a bit, but I used one of these from a very early age, only around the house, but it was excellent. Takes a bit of practice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robsk II Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 I'll second all of what NS and Lazlo said, having been through all this in the last year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dibden Purlieu Saint Posted 30 August, 2012 Author Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Baby Bjorn is great. I have a spare brand new baby bjorn in lime green if someone wants to buy it of me. Mothercare sent me 2 by accident. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctoroncall Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Found this quite interesting actually, my wife and I will be starting a family next year. Time to start saving then and now you're put pressure on yourself for an August/September arrival ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tamesaint Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 Some great advice here. I mentioned this thread to my miisus who is a midwife & used to run parentcraft classes. She approves of the advice that you have been given on here. (She is in the camp of keep them in the same room as you - if you want to but to move them out if you do not)/ The more unusual tips she came up with are Dont buy clothes for 0 - 3 months. They grow out of them too quick. Dont buy all the gadgets. You don't need them. eg Put the baby in the bath with you. You dont heed a baby bath and its much more fun for you. Buy a baby bouncer and dont be afraid to put the baby in the bouncer in front of the washing machine. Babies are fascinated by washing machinesand thisis a way to give you some peace and quiet if they start to get fractious. The best bit of advice we were given was "Babies come to live with you - you don't go to live with them". Of course you spoil them. You love tthem to bits. Of course you do everything you possibly can for them. But you create a rod for your own back if you give into their every whim as they get older. Don't change your life for ever. The couple who gave us this advice ended up with 3 very well adjusted normal daughters. Our son seems ok (well most of the time!!). My mate who ignored this advice now has a spoilt brat of a 9 year old daughter. He doesn't come to football any more. He doesn't go horse racing any more. He enjoyed being a father in the eary days....but he is not so happy now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Majestic Channon Posted 30 August, 2012 Share Posted 30 August, 2012 As said above, enjoy your kids while you can they grow up fast, though mine are 2 and 7. Good luck, All the best years are ahead Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddog Posted 31 August, 2012 Share Posted 31 August, 2012 I have a spare brand new baby bjorn in lime green if someone wants to buy it of me. Mothercare sent me 2 by accident. How much? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whitey Grandad Posted 31 August, 2012 Share Posted 31 August, 2012 Congratulations. From now on your life will not be your own, but that's ok. You'll be the daddy, head of the family, paterfamilias. You will suddenly be responsible for clothing and feeding all of you and not just yourself. It will be the most rewarding experience of your life. Remember to enjoy every moment of their growing up. Very soon they will have grown out of sandcastles on the beach and you'll be lying awake wondering what time they'll come home. Then one day they'll be looking after you. Don't be too busy working, make time for your family, nothing else is more important. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anothersaintinsouthsea Posted 31 August, 2012 Share Posted 31 August, 2012 Dont buy all the gadgets. You don't need them. eg Put the baby in the bath with you. You dont heed a baby bath and its much more fun for you. Agree with this, we bought loads of stuff with our first but ended up hardly using some things e.g. expensive baby monitor - live in a fairly average sized 3 bed house, if the baby cries you can hear them quite easily thanks very much without the need for stereo enhancement. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
norwaysaint Posted 31 August, 2012 Share Posted 31 August, 2012 I'd add to the list of things you don't really need to buy with a changing table. Lots of people buy a big piece of furniture just for changing nappies. we found it better just to have a cheap Ikea inflatable changing mat on the floor. Then you don't have the fear of the baby falling or rolling off of it if you turn your back to pick something up. Portable and easy to clean too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saint-scooby Posted 31 August, 2012 Share Posted 31 August, 2012 Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny These are great and if you get a good one your kids wont fu-ck up later in life xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Bad Bob Posted 1 September, 2012 Share Posted 1 September, 2012 Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny Nanny These are great and if you get a good one your kids wont fu-ck up later in life xx Nice if you have a spare ~£30K+ a year Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dibden Purlieu Saint Posted 2 September, 2012 Author Share Posted 2 September, 2012 How much? 35? In lime green. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mmm Donuts Posted 3 September, 2012 Share Posted 3 September, 2012 Just try and enjoy it as much as you can, it can be difficult and tiring but they soon grow up and get an attitude. I bought my eldest a beer at St. Mary's for the first time last season! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now