Paul Merson and his SSN crudness...

[SNSUN]

Right, first thing's first, I'm not looking for negativity, nor do I expect this to stay on the main board for too long before it gets shipped off to General Sports. AND I'm just in from a night out. But... Paul Merson has to be the most CR-P pundit ever. Not just on British sports television, but ever. Now, perhaps he suffers from having the articulate Matthew Le Tissier sat next to him, but it wasn't even just a case of not knowing a player's name today. I know his incompetency has been reported in the past, but he was on form yesterday.

 

Firstly was Lamberts' opener. He was watching OUR game live - but he didn't know who Schneiderlin was, so he just said "...and it was set up by a great run by...umm...umm...let's say Liana." So not only did he get the player wrong, or he cared not to try and say his name, but the player he chose to mention? Yep, got his name wrong too. And? Sorry for this point, frivolity on my part, but he reported the goal as if it was the first of a thrashing.

 

Millwall's first? An own goal. By Hooverd, apparently. He has the benefit of replays.

 

Millwall's second? The first of the two goals I believe he got right yesterday. A cracking shot.

 

Southampton's second? He got this right too, mainly because MLT was cheering his arse off next to him, although had Sharp struck it first time, we wouldn't be having this conversation. (Yes, I believe had Sharp had his full killer instinct he'd have sunk it first time)

 

Our third? 'Shouldn't have been given because a Southampton player handled it'. Now granted, at full speed, it was tough to say, but that's how the ref saw it, and the ref saw it at full speed. Merse has the benefit of replays in the studio. And, while watching the replays, he maintained a Southampton player handled it. (Apparently in summarising the game he said both were penalties, and he regains credit for that.)

 

Now I'm not on a witch hunt, nor do I expect SSN to allow MLT to cover a Saints game due to bias, but it seems to me Merson is a terrible, terrible pundit. What do you reckon?

 

(Incidentally, for those of you that were actually watching SSN, did you see Kamara try and say the Watford players' name? ' Kačaniklić' became Kacananaclic, and the SSN lot were in hysterics. Why do they employ these people?)

[Pilchards]

They employ them because it's an entertainment business as well.

 

Rather them two than Phil Thomson.

[KK the 2nd]

Kamara's ok but I agree with you re Merson ... total plank

[Ewell]

They employ them because it's an entertainment business as well.

 

Rather them two than Phil Thomson.

 

Exactly. How else would they also get ontent for there XMAS day special without employing the likes of Kamara, Merson, and Charlie the plank.

 

If you want serious reports o nthe game then list to BBC Radio 5 live.

[chocco boxo]

Often think the proper (educated / trained ) commentators must tear their hair out at those lot getting that gig! But in a sorry way they do make it watchable and entertainment. Merson is ok in my book, its Champagne Charlie that gets my goat!

[Thedelldays]

i like soccer saturday....nothing too serious, obviously biased and can be funny

[sammysaint]

If i am bored at home not playing or watching, nothing is better then watching soccer saturday and having a laugh at merson karma etc, but jeff normally points out he is wrong and they all take the ****, if neither Jeff or MLT corrected him then there to blame as well if your gonna blame Mersons pundit skills, since MLT and i belive Jeffs sons are Saints fans.

[skintsaint]

Didn't mind Kamara when I watched Soccer Sat a few years back. Always good banter between him and Jeff Stelling.

 

http://youtu.be/K5T-ItZc8TA

[thegaffer]

You'll like this then http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7V4nP3jvn0Q

i like soccer saturday....nothing too serious, obviously biased and can be funny

[bender]

No one would ever claim the Merson was inteligent and ever prided himself on being as accurate as he possibly could.

 

But the man is hilarious. We werent complaining when he said we were as good as Barcelona when we beat Oldham 6 nil last season, or when he said we should be in the Champions league when we won at Ipswich I think earlier this season, although clearly we all know were not that good.

 

I loved his honesty when Pompey were going through the myer the first time round (2010). "no one buys Portsmouth shirts in Liverpool so why the ek are they paying players 60 grand a week." "Its like a poker match but instead of throwing in your car keys you throw in Portsmouth FC" was another.

 

Its an entertainment business. Commentators like Motty and Parry seem to be clued up with all the facts but just bore me, unlike Tyler who gets hillariously excited at times.

[Glasgow_Saint]

Had sky installed yesterday and watched SSN from 2-5 great show imo

 

Helps when we get two late pens

[Saint Stimp]

During the highlights after the main show he said he didn't have replays during the match so he wanted to see the pen incident again, and once he saw it he admitted he'd made a mistake, that it was a clear pen and he needed his eyes testing.

 

What you also have to remember is that Soccer Saturday is not just a football show, it's an entertainment show as well. Merson is not a pundit, he's just there for a bit of comic relief. And yes, whilst it can be frustrating when he's reporting on your team, watching him struggle through simple reports and getting rinsed by Stelling and Le Tiss for mispronouncing the easiest of names can be pretty funny.

 

So to answer your question 'why do they employ these people?' - because without them you might as well just watch Final Score on BBC 1. But I'd rather have a couple of laughs.

[Verbal Kint]

I like him. It's perfectly clear he isn't intelligent but i always find him very honest and he isn't afraid to say some thing slightly controversial even if it might cause a reaction.

 

The show is all about seeing the scores come in and enjoying the obvious camaraderie the pundits have with each other. Getting upset because one of them can't pronounce a player's surname properly is just a bit lame...

[Matty's Caddy]

Anyone who saw the roadshow at the mayflower will admit it was merse who made the evening, very funny and very honest. They've added kammy as well now who is also great entertainment.

These people make the show

[thegaffer]

The live show is hilarious. Saw it at the Mayflower a couple of months ago.Going to BIC Bournemouth to see it again tomorrow night.Looking forward to it.Merse is probally the star of the live shows.Very funny and quick witted. Chris Kamara is doing his first one tomorrow and he wasnt at the Mayflower show so again loking forward to seeing how he stands up to the stick he going to get from Merse,Tiss,Thomo,Charlie and Jeff Steling.

Had sky installed yesterday and watched SSN from 2-5 great show imo

 

Helps when we get two late pens

[Golden Balls]

So to answer your question 'why do they employ these people?' - because without them you might as well just watch Final Score on BBC 1. But I'd rather have a couple of laughs.

 

This.

 

It's entertaining. So what if he doesn't know how to say Schneiderlins name correctly. I laughed.

[Under Weststand]

Just don't take it to seriously. I find it enjoyable the banter is hilarious at times. Stelling even said they had deliberately sent Kamara to Watford because of their players so they could all have a laugh at him trying to pronounce them. As for Merson & the second pen he said at the time he had no replay, when summing up at the end of the show & watched it again he joked that he needed glasses as it was a stonewall pen. Not saying he is my cup of tea, as he does annoy me at times but he's there for comedy value.

[beatlesaint]

I like Merson BUT not when he is doing our games ! If the OP thinks that was bad he should have heard him when they showed the goals....we have a new player called Shinerlin too !

 

With benefit of replays he should be able to tell who is who, the og was pretty easy to spot if only cos Fonte has 1 number on his back while Jos has 2 !!

[dronskisaint]

In fairness he was probably pi**ed

[VectisSaint]

Our third? 'Shouldn't have been given because a Southampton player handled it'. Now granted, at full speed, it was tough to say, but that's how the ref saw it, and the ref saw it at full speed. Merse has the benefit of replays in the studio. And, while watching the replays, he maintained a Southampton player handled it. (Apparently in summarising the game he said both were penalties, and he regains credit for that.)

He clearly stated that after the match when he saw the 3rd goal (2nd pen) again that this was the first time he had seen it replayed and accepted that he got it completely wrong and should have gone to Specsavers. I don't really like Merson, but it seems like they don't always have the benefit of replays as you would think. What I don't understand is the logic of having Merson covering Saints while Tiss sits alongside watching Dirty Leeds v Wet Sham, seems a bit cruel to me.

[ecuk268]

Anyone who saw the roadshow at the mayflower will admit it was merse who made the evening, very funny and very honest. They've added kammy as well now who is also great entertainment.

These people make the show

 

Agreed, he was very good that night. A natural story teller who could make a living as an after-dinner speaker.

[beatlesaint]

He clearly stated that after the match when he saw the 3rd goal (2nd pen) again that this was the first time he had seen it replayed and accepted that he got it completely wrong and should have gone to Specsavers. I don't really like Merson, but it seems like they don't always have the benefit of replays as you would think. What I don't understand is the logic of having Merson covering Saints while Tiss sits alongside watching Dirty Leeds v Wet Sham, seems a bit cruel to me.

 

They tend to, when possible, keep ex players away from their "favoured" clubs. Thommo never does Liverpool in the same way Matt never does us....the only time I can remember is that last day win or bust v. Sheff Utd a few years ago, but I'm sure that was only for the cruelty factor.

[thegaffer]

I think you'll find he makes an awful lot of money as an after diner speaker.

Agreed, he was very good that night. A natural story teller who could make a living as an after-dinner speaker.

[rshephard3]

If the alternative is listening to a f**king bitter Garth Crooks and bland Martin Keown on the BBC talking about football like it's as serious as a world war then give me Soccer Sat any day. Merson is the worst of the bunch on there though. Surprised to see a few ppl moaning about Charlie Nicholas, don't have any major problem with him myself.

[shurlock]

More lucid when he was caning lines of charlie after his cornflakes - still time to time he comes up with the odd (unintentional) gem: "they're like a bag of revels...they've got a bit of everything" being my fav. Or comparing us to Barcelona after our mauling of Oldham.

Edited 18 March, 2012 by shurlock

[Pilchards]

Am I the only one that does not like Thomson?

[Dig Dig]

Am I the only one that does not like Thomson?

 

No you're not!

[krissyboy31]

TBH the cockups add to the show, especially when the rest of the panel continually rib whoever has made them. We generally get good press from Soccer Saturday and SSN has a whole because of the amount of staff (panelists and presenters) who have Saints' sympathies.

[kpturner]

Am I the only one that does not like Thomson?

I spent the afternoon at Soccer Saturday last season as a guest of MLT and I have to say that it changed my opinion of Phil Thompson. He is genuinely one of the nicest blokes you could wish to meet- and I was convinced he was an absolute **** before that day. To be fair, the whole team were really friendly and made you feel welcome. Great grub as well

[Special K]

Merse is great value and his inarticulate presentation is part of his charm. In fact the whole programme is enjoyable to watch precisely because it seems like a bunch of mates having the crack about the football. I love taking my nipper to games now, but the best times i have had at the football have all been with my mates and to me this is just another version of that. Compare it to the stuffy, boring, over-analytical BBC Final Score which doesn't have any real personality. I know which i prefer.

[beatlesaint]

Merse is great value and his inarticulate presentation is part of his charm. In fact the whole programme is enjoyable to watch precisely because it seems like a bunch of mates having the crack about the football. I love taking my nipper to games now, but the best times i have had at the football have all been with my mates and to me this is just another version of that. Compare it to the stuffy, boring, over-analytical BBC Final Score which doesn't have any real personality. I know which i prefer.

 

I agree, its been so long since I watched BBC that I was amazed to read that Garth bloody Crooks still has a job.

[Dibden Purlieu Saint]

I can't believe the OP is complaining. It is a very funny, very honest show, and Merse is just one of the cogs in that.

[SuperMikey]

In fairness he was probably pi**ed

 

Or coked off his t!ts.

[SNSUN]

In fairness he was probably pi**ed

 

Me or Merse!?! I was plastered when I wrote the OP, although I'm amazed at how good my typing was, having read it back it was a little OTT, although I do think Merse's balls ups are funny, I do prefer the coherant and intelligent MLT. Obviously! Was Merse plastered? Isn't he always? :-D

[Saint_Jonny]

Soccder Saturday is great. Bit boring from 12-3pm, but once the games start it is great. The whole show will be relevant if we get promoted

[eurosaint]

Relieved to see a strong defence of this programme by most posters as it is my favourite Saturday alternative to being at a Saints match !

Characters like Merson and kamara are clearly part of the formula and it works !

Sometimes (mainly midweek !) you get the likes of Tony Cottee, Scott Minto, John Salako, Gordon McQueen and it's just not the same !

TBF, Jeff Stelling is the key player as he is both professional and highly amusing, allowing the panel to be themselves and not take it all too seriously !

[Durleyfos]

Seeing as Merse is dyslexic, I can understand him having trouble with some of the surnames of the foreign players.

 

I like him, very entertaining.

[The Corellian]

Seeing as Merse is dyslexic, I can understand him having trouble with some of the surnames of the foreign players.

 

I like him, very entertaining.

Why is dyslexic so hard to spell?

[corsacar saint]

Merson is a plank and he played for Portsmouth.On the other hand it would be duller without him. [ Not that I watch it very much at all ].

[krissyboy31]

Why is dyslexic so hard to spell?

That's the test, if you can spell it you can't be it.

[Cosmic]

During the highlights after the main show he said he didn't have replays during the match so he wanted to see the pen incident again, and once he saw it he admitted he'd made a mistake, that it was a clear pen and he needed his eyes testing.

 

What you also have to remember is that Soccer Saturday is not just a football show, it's an entertainment show as well. Merson is not a pundit, he's just there for a bit of comic relief. And yes, whilst it can be frustrating when he's reporting on your team, watching him struggle through simple reports and getting rinsed by Stelling and Le Tiss for mispronouncing the easiest of names can be pretty funny.

 

So to answer your question 'why do they employ these people?' - because without them you might as well just watch Final Score on BBC 1. But I'd rather have a couple of laughs.

 

This sums it up perfectly.

[John Boy Saint]

Huckleby is the one that still sticks in my head from Merson from years ago............ All match he tried to say Huckerby and for nearly 2 hours he crashed and burned every time.

[whelk]

They do seem charitable with who they employ - George Best was hopeless and who in right mind would give Dean Windass a job analysing?

Mind Merson is a half buffoon half shrewd pundit.

Remember him pouring scorn on a brilliant Messi run and goal saying yeah but look at defending, you don't get that in PL - the opposition was Real Madrid, admittedly they don't have same class as Wigan, Bolton, Wolves, Blackburn......

And as Andy Gray famously said could he do it on a wet Wednesday night at Stoke? Answer: clearly being the best player in the world, then yes he would be able to dink past Shawcross and Huth I'd comfortably predict.