When I get old - I am not going to ...

[landford.saint]

I am one of the lucky "so and so's" to have been able to take early retirement. I have a part time job, partly to keep my brains alive, and partly because its more than a decade before I can subsidize my works pension with a state one. I work part time in a Tesco's and it gives me opportunity to watch people. These observation have made me vow never to do the following:-

 

1. Wear beige. It seems that men when they reach a certain age can only dress in matching beige clothes. Trousers, jumpers, socks, shoes, shirts .. all beige.

2. Go shopping on a Friday morning. Despite having all week off they all descend on Tesco's on a Friday Morning.

3. Complain that the supermarket is always crowded. If they didn't always shop on Friday mornings they would find other quieter days of the week.

4. Stand examining a product for what seems an eon with trolley parked strategically across the ailse blocking all persons from moving freely.

5. Moan when someone has the audacity to move your 'offending' blocking trolley.

6. Moan.

7. Drive at 25 mph in a 40 mph limit, then brake when I see the 30 limit ahead slowing to 20mph.

8. Whilst driving at 25 mph brake violently every time I see a car coming in the opposite direction 2 miles away.

9. ....

 

Anything I forgot.

[Guest Dark Sotonic Mills]

Yes you are. And you will enjoy it, just to be bloody awkward.

[Saint in Paradise]

Being old has some advantages, one is that you can look at young ladies without appearing

to be a perve. They treat you like you are their own grandfather - however they can't read

your mind ;) Well so an old friend told me.

[dubai_phil]

Being old has some advantages, one is that you can look at young ladies without appearing

to be a perve. They treat you like you are their own grandfather - however they can't read

your mind ;) Well so an old friend told me.

 

There are so many more things that could be added to that, perhaps if you swapped Grandfather with Uncle you'd be closer to the truth.

 

Perhaps the best one I can think of is "As you get older you realise why so many girls when you were a lot younger didn't seem interested in you or your mates back in those days".......

[pap]

10. Stop saying please and thank-you.

[Ohio Saint]

When I'm an old git at the checkout, I will demand that I got to the front of the queue because i am in danger of wetting myself. If I don't get what I want I will then wet myself and loudly blame everyone else.

[for_heaven's_Saint]

Constantly remind people of my age! So many old people feel the need to tell you that their '87 next year' or 'nearly 90 years of age'. And they always round it up!

[1976_Child]

vote Tory.

[egg]

Never hold a door open for anyone, but tut and moan if it's not opened for you.

 

Oh, and never wait in line at the deli counter.