Spudders Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 Just wondering what thoughts were on this topic? After a period of self imposed singleness, I’m thinking about dating again (and by dating I mean just sitting at home, looking on dating websites, building up the courage to finally message some girls, then being crushed when none of them even reply to me, but anyway I digress!!!!). So having had a bit of a look at some of my ‘search results’ (and based on the key fact that I am a fussy fooker) most of the time when someone catches my eye, I look at her profile and she will have kids. I’ve always discredited girls with kids previously, however am considering the fact that I may need to start being a little less fussy! Thoughts please……….. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Duckhunter Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 How old are you? Seriously, if you are past 35 most of the birds will have kids. To automatically discount them, is cutting your options down quite considerably. I was going to offer you a night Mrs Duck, but she's had 4............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spudders Posted 28 March, 2011 Author Share Posted 28 March, 2011 4!!!! Crikey, cheers for the offer though. I'm 36. Yeah that's the problem, there's a reason why most of the childless ones are still single!!!! The hotter ones are the ones with kids (no real surprise that others have been happy to fling it up um in the past!!) I have always considerably cut down my options due to being so fussy, that's my main problem. My mates all tell me I'm too fussy and I know they are right, but I have just never wanted to compromise. I suppose the one advantage is that (in my opinion) kids are absolutely useless for the first couple of years anyway (all they do is sleep, pooh and throw up!) so at least I miss all that rubbish if I meet someone with kids over a couple of years Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 Just wondering what thoughts were on this topic? After a period of self imposed singleness, I’m thinking about dating again (and by dating I mean just sitting at home, looking on dating websites, building up the courage to finally message some girls, then being crushed when none of them even reply to me, but anyway I digress!!!!). So having had a bit of a look at some of my ‘search results’ (and based on the key fact that I am a fussy fooker) most of the time when someone catches my eye, I look at her profile and she will have kids. I’ve always discredited girls with kids previously, however am considering the fact that I may need to start being a little less fussy! Thoughts please……….. Women with kids are actually quite good value in a relationship and well worth considering. The kids mean they aren't as selfish as single women without kids who expect the moon on a stick from a boyfriend, they tend to be more thoughtful as they are used to thinking about people other than themselves. The kids keep them busy and restict their going out opportunities meaning you can go out when you want without the worry she'll turn up at the pub and catch you doing something you shouldn't be. Having kids also means she'll also be used to cooking, cleaning and picking clothes up off the floor without moaning about it, always a useful skill for a woman in a relationship to have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colinjb Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I'm 26. Mrs Colinjb has a child from a previous relationship. Had I decided not to continue a relationship with her just because she had a child it would have been one of the most shortsighted and rediculous things I could have possibly ever done. The little girl in question is a total joy, can be unpredictable at times... but that's children! If the girl is the right one for you then any children they have shouldn't be an issue. As a further thought, if you do ever want children of your own, what better way could there be to find out out how you/they would cope as a parent? She has already been there and you would see how you will get on with the little one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spudders Posted 28 March, 2011 Author Share Posted 28 March, 2011 Women with kids are actually quite good value in a relationship and well worth considering. The kids mean they aren't as selfish as single women without kids who expect the moon on a stick from a boyfriend, they tend to be more thoughtful as they are used to thinking about people other than themselves. The kids keep them busy and restict their going out opportunities meaning you can go out when you want without the worry she'll turn up at the pub and catch you doing something you shouldn't be. Having kids also means she'll also be used to cooking, cleaning and picking clothes up off the floor without moaning about it, always a useful skill for a woman in a relationship to have. See this is exactly why the Lounge is so useful and some people post in here more than the main forum. I can't do anything with the knowledge of how many points we need to score on average for the rest of the season, but this sort of information you've written is pure gold and could change my life. I would simply never have thought about some of these points. Good work! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spudders Posted 28 March, 2011 Author Share Posted 28 March, 2011 If the girl is the right one for you then any children they have shouldn't be an issue. True, I just can't help thinking it'd always be at the back of my mind that they were not mine, no matter how close I got to them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 True, I just can't help thinking it'd always be at the back of my mind that they were not mine, no matter how close I got to them. Ideal scenario though, if they are little diamonds, you can take the credit, if they are little c*nts then you can use the excuse that they aren't yours and their real dad is a cock. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saintscottofthenortham Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 A few mates of mine have gone through exactly this. Some have lasted a month before bailing out, some a couple of years and two of them are still going strong and have their own kids with their missus. I have always wondered how they could do it, thinking to myself "I could never do that." but seeing mates do it and the fantastic times they not only have with their partners but also enjoying their kids aswell has opened my eyes. I'm afraid your days of being fussy are long gone pal, time to bite the bullet and take the plunge for a Milf. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spudders Posted 28 March, 2011 Author Share Posted 28 March, 2011 time to bite the bullet and take the plunge for a Milf. oh lordy that expression doesn't help! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonnyboy Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 Women with kids are actually quite good value in a relationship and well worth considering. The kids mean they aren't as selfish as single women without kids who expect the moon on a stick from a boyfriend, they tend to be more thoughtful as they are used to thinking about people other than themselves. The kids keep them busy and restict their going out opportunities meaning you can go out when you want without the worry she'll turn up at the pub and catch you doing something you shouldn't be. Having kids also means she'll also be used to cooking, cleaning and picking clothes up off the floor without moaning about it, always a useful skill for a woman in a relationship to have. Very astute observations! However, Id also add that they will want a decent quality of fella (ie cash rich) to "provide" for said offspring?... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 (edited) See this is exactly why the Lounge is so useful and some people post in here more than the main forum. I can't do anything with the knowledge of how many points we need to score on average for the rest of the season, but this sort of information you've written is pure gold and could change my life. I would simply never have thought about some of these points. Good work! I suppose the potential real difficulty could be the Ex and father of the children. If you are a great catch and a step up from him he will be bitterly jealous of you and do everything he can to put the skids on the relationship just because of his envy of you. Although in this isnstance, given women dont reply to your emails on dating websites, it seems that you are not a significant improvement on him, because you are with his ex then he'll probably reason he is on your level catch wise and become deeply insecure thinking that someone like yourself is sleeping with his ex and spending time with his kids. He will resent you for the large dose of realsim you have given him and woken him up to the fact that he is not as funny, attractive and charming as he thought he was. Because he hates you the kids will, he will posions their minds against you and because the kids hate you that could present issues with the girl and create significant problems with the realtionship, 'tis a minefield out there my ol' chum. Edited 28 March, 2011 by Turkish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minsk Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 Colinjb, Scott and Turkish all raise some very good points. Serioiusly, don't discount anyone just because she has a kid/kids. However, if you are really that fussy you should come over here. Had I come here when single I'm sure I would have sh*gged myself to death. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cryoman1965 Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 If you look around the age 36 plus she may have an pretty fit 17-18 year old daughter...............errr to help with the washing up:-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dellgirl Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I know it is old fashioned but you could try having a relationship without sex for awhile until you really get to know her and her kid(s) and just date ,she won't think you are gay,just that you respect her and not using her for trampolene practice,if that IS what she wants then over to you but don't get her pregnant before you really know it's right for both of you and another mouth to feed for years and years. Good luck I hope you find someone lovely who will make you happy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spudders Posted 28 March, 2011 Author Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I know it is old fashioned but you could try having a relationship without sex for awhile until you really get to know her and her kid(s) and just date ,she won't think you are gay,just that you respect her and not using her for trampolene practice,if that IS what she wants then over to you but don't get her pregnant before you really know it's right for both of you and another mouth to feed for years and years. Good luck I hope you find someone lovely who will make you happy. To be fair hardly anyone on this thread has talked about sex, that's certainly not the angle I was coming from. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 Very astute observations! However, Id also add that they will want a decent quality of fella (ie cash rich) to "provide" for said offspring?... I think you can probably guage this by how many kids she has. 1 = Obsessed with kid, devotes her whole life to what the pampered little brat wants and only wants a rich and attractive man and will be made clear from day one that you are second choice to her child and if they dont like you then it's game over 2= Really busy with both kids and job, will fit you in when they can, struggling a bit financially if they are working so will appreciate the extra pair of hands and help with the bills 3 + Anything will do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 (edited) What happened to Georgie? She was quite attractive and single with no kids and not over fussy (FFS, Romsey Stu took her out on a date so must have very low standards) She could be perfect for you. Edited 28 March, 2011 by Turkish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
View From The Top Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I know it is old fashioned but you could try having a relationship without sex for awhile until you really get to know her and her kid(s) and just date ,she won't think you are gay,just that you respect her and not using her for trampolene practice,if that IS what she wants then over to you but don't get her pregnant before you really know it's right for both of you and another mouth to feed for years and years. Good luck I hope you find someone lovely who will make you happy. Meanwhile, away from lollipop land........... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
revolution saint Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 Easy to generalise on a thread like this and not all single mothers are the same just as not all single women without kids are the same. It's never really bothered me and in fact the kid aspect opens the opportunities like going to theme parks and doing genuine kid stuff that can be pretty good fun (and no, not in a pervy way). Of course it's also more restrictive as well. The other thing to bear in mind is that single parents don't have a lot of free time and, if they're a good parent, are dedicated to their child or children. Even if you get on you might find you don't have much in common either. Ultimately though everyone is different but you if exclude purely on the basis of having kids then you may be missing out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 (edited) Easy to generalise on a thread like this and not all single mothers are the same just as not all single women without kids are the same. It's never really bothered me and in fact the kid aspect opens the opportunities like going to theme parks and doing genuine kid stuff that can be pretty good fun (and no, not in a pervy way). Of course it's also more restrictive as well. The other thing to bear in mind is that single parents don't have a lot of free time and, if they're a good parent, are dedicated to their child or children. Even if you get on you might find you don't have much in common either. Ultimately though everyone is different but you if exclude purely on the basis of having kids then you may be missing out. Personally should i be back on the market, i would only consider women with kids for that reason. It would mean more free time for you. Rather than the new bird being needy. insecure and a pain the arse that most single women generally are, wanting to spend all her time with you she'd have something else to occupy her time with leaving you free to have the best of a both worlds. Space to do the things you enjoy and spend time with your mates but also get to spend time with them as and when you want to. I would probably only a want a woman with one child though as anymore than that and it's hard work trying to be nice to them both and expensive going places and if there is more than one kid with more than one dad that is definitiely out as the girl is obviously stupid. Edited 28 March, 2011 by Turkish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Verbal Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 Personally should i be back on the market, i would only consider children with kids for that reason. Really? You'd be quite a catch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 Really? You'd be quite a catch. thanks, i know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
revolution saint Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 Personally should i be back on the market, i would only consider children with kids for that reason. It would mean more free time for you. Rather than the new bird being needy. insecure and a pain the arse that most single women generally are, wanting to spend all her time with you she'd have something else to occupy her time with leaving you free to have the best of a both worlds. Space to do the things you enjoy and spend time with your mates but also get to spend time with them as and when you want to. I would probably only a want a woman with one child though as anymore than that and it's hard work trying to be nice to them both and expensive going places and if there is more than one kid with more than one dad that is definitiely out as the girl is obviously stupid. I think that younger end of the market could get you in trouble.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colinjb Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 in fact the kid aspect opens the opportunities like going to theme parks and doing genuine kid stuff that can be pretty good fun (and no, not in a pervy way). Absolutely true! Spending time in the park with the little one... going on swings etc and not feeling self conscious about it because it's all about entertaining the nipper is great! Makes you feel younger again to be fair. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
View From The Top Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 Absolutely true! Spending time in the park with the little one... going on swings etc and not feeling self conscious about it because it's all about entertaining the nipper is great! Makes you feel younger again to be fair. As 26 is soooooo old! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aintforever Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 My mate has been smashing his way through the single mothers on match.com for a while now, he recommends it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 there is always http://www.plentyoffish.com/ if you just want to get your willy wet of course, most of them will be single mothers, even if they haven't admitted it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I think that younger end of the market could get you in trouble.... hmm, might need to raise my age threashold a little bit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colinjb Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 (edited) As 26 is soooooo old! Compared to a two and a half year old toddler, hell yeah. If anything, being about 26 is worse for that, still just about young enough to care what people think if they see you doing something daft. Edited 28 March, 2011 by Colinjb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kadeem Hardison Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I have been bringing up somebody else's child for a few years now. She isn't my girlfriend's daughter, she's just some girl I found at a holiday resort in Portugal a few years back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonnyboy Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I have been bringing up somebody else's child for a few years now. She isn't my girlfriend's daughter, she's just some girl I found at a holiday resort in Portugal a few years back. Shut up Deppo, youre banned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colinjb Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I have been bringing up somebody else's child for a few years now. She isn't my girlfriend's daughter, she's just some girl I found at a holiday resort in Portugal a few years back. I lol'd. Oh satan I await your welcoming arms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hatch Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I would have no problem bringing up someone elses kids, but I would hate it , absolutely hate it, if someone else was bringing up mine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kadeem Hardison Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I brought up someone else's kids. That's what happens if you eat them too quickly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spudders Posted 28 March, 2011 Author Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I have been bringing up somebody else's child for a few years now. She isn't my girlfriend's daughter, she's just some girl I found at a holiday resort in Portugal a few years back. This was really funny! I brought up someone else's kids. That's what happens if you eat them too quickly. This was a poor effort! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kadeem Hardison Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 I was playing to the different audiences. The second one was for dune, as he likes Michael McIntyre. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted 28 March, 2011 Share Posted 28 March, 2011 My mate has been smashing his way through the single mothers on match.com for a while now, he recommends it. and they say romance is dead. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Durleyfos Posted 29 March, 2011 Share Posted 29 March, 2011 I have been bringing up somebody else's child for a few years now. She isn't my girlfriend's daughter, she's just some girl I found at a holiday resort in Portugal a few years back. I know I shouldn't, but Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
View From The Top Posted 29 March, 2011 Share Posted 29 March, 2011 I would have no problem bringing up someone elses kids, but I would hate it , absolutely hate it, if someone else was bringing up mine. I know just what you mean. Just after Xmas I was meeting someone at a pub car park by M6/J13 to drop off some items I'd picked up in Italy for him. As I was waiting a fella pulled in with two young girls, 8-10ish at a guess, who were being met by their mum and her fella. These girls were breaking their hearts and hanging on to their dad and wouldn't let him go. He looked as if something inside of him was dying as they drove away, tears streaming down their faces, shouting for their dad. Made me cry if I'm honest and as soon as I got back home I just cuddled my 3 as close as I could and told them how I'd never, ever, leave them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Duckhunter Posted 29 March, 2011 Share Posted 29 March, 2011 When I was single I would say that the pro's far outweigh the cons. 1. They tend to be more desperate (although I'd steer clear of dating websites). 2. There aren't so many runners and riders in the field, as a few blokes aren't interested in single mums. 3. They need to rush home to the baby sitter, so wont want to hang around for a cuddle or stay all night after you've had your way. 4. They dont go out as much, so stay pretty faithful. 5. They are easier to dump without looking like a bastard. You can come out with "it's not fair on the kids" type of thing. The ones I would target are ones that have been single for a while, some newly seperated or divorced go a bit wild. If you get one whose starting to get to the "I'll never get another man" stage, then her sights will be a bit lower. Good luck, let us know how it goes............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deppo Posted 29 March, 2011 Share Posted 29 March, 2011 Shut up Deppo, youre banned. I wondered why I couldn't access this forum. I thought the internet was broken. Thanks for letting me know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Verbal Posted 29 March, 2011 Share Posted 29 March, 2011 I wondered why I couldn't access this forum. I thought the internet was broken. Thanks for letting me know. Welcome back despot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spudders Posted 29 March, 2011 Author Share Posted 29 March, 2011 I wondered why I couldn't access this forum. I thought the internet was broken. Thanks for letting me know. Ah good to see you back Deppo, it was obviously only a temporary ban. In your absence I started to have to look elsewhere for a favourite funny poster as I needed to fill the Deppo void. Thankfully Turkish made me lol a few times yesterday and whilst it’s good to see you back, it’s nice to know I now have a back up ready for when you are next banned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deppo Posted 29 March, 2011 Share Posted 29 March, 2011 I feel like how I imagine Guy Garvey feels when he looks out into his audience and sees someone with an Orson t-shirt on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergei Gotsmanov Posted 29 March, 2011 Share Posted 29 March, 2011 I feel like how I imagine Guy Garvey feels when he looks out into his audience and sees someone with an Orson t-shirt on. hope that learned you. Welcome back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now