Jump to content

Favourite comedic quotes....


saint lard
 Share

Recommended Posts

Alan Partridge......

 

I know lying is wrong, but if the elephant man came in now in a blouse with some make up on, and said "how do I look?" Would you say, bearing in mind he's depressed and has respiratory problems, would you say "go and take that blusher off you mis-shapened elephant tranny"? No. You'd say "You look nice... John"

 

 

Steve Martin.....

 

“I believe you should place a woman on a pedestal - high enough so you can look up her dress”

 

 

Robin williams.....

 

"Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.”

 

Robin williams.....

 

“Ah...so many pedestrians, so little time...”

Edited by saint lard
Link to comment
Share on other sites

from caddyshack, danny the caddy talking to Ty the club rich guy on a putting green;

 

"I got to get this scholarship, or I'll be working in the lumberyard all my life."

 

Ty; " whats wrong with lumber? I own two lumberyards"

 

Danny; "I notice you dont spend much time there."

 

Ty; "well, I'm not sure where they are..."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...