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Clever & silly quotes in Football


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"Argentina won't be at Euro 2000 because they're from South America."

 

"They're the second best team in the world and there's no higher praise than that."

 

"One of his strengths is not heading."

 

"He's using his strength. And that is his strength, his strength."

 

"My father was a miner and he worked down a mine."

 

"Hungary is very similar to Bulgaria. I know they're different countries..."

 

"England have the best fans in the world and Scotland's fans are second to none."

 

"Against France we'll have to be at our best both technically, tactically and spirit-wise."

 

"You can't do better than go away from home and get a draw."

 

"We deserved to win this game after hammering them 0-0 in the first half."

 

"I don't think there's anyone bigger or smaller than Maradona."

 

"The 33 or 34 year olds will be 36 or 37 by the time the next World Cup comes around, if they're not careful."

 

"Maine Road was a great football stadium but as time moved on it stayed where it is..."

 

"Chile have three options - they could win or they could lose."

 

"Gary always weighed up his options, especially when he had no choice."

 

"The tide is very much in our court now."

 

"The Germans only have one player under 22, and he's 23."

 

"You don't get two chances at this level, or at any other level for that matter."

 

"He can't speak Turkey, but you can tell he's delighted."

 

"Batistuta is very good at pulling off defenders."

 

"There'll be no siestas in Madrid tonight."

 

"It's understandable that people are keeping one eye on the pot and another up the chimney."

 

"England can end the millennium as it started - as the greatest football nation in the world."

 

"I know what is around the corner - I just don't know where the corner is. But the onus is on us to perform and we must control the bandwagon."

 

"They compare Steve McManaman to Steve Heighway and he's nothing like him, but I can see why - it's because he's a bit different..."

 

"The good news for Nigeria is that they're two-nil down very early in the game..."

 

"Despite his white boots, he has real pace..."

 

"That would have been a goal if it wasn't saved."

 

"Goalkeepers aren't born today until they're in their late 2Os or 3Os."

 

"The substitute is about to come on - he's a player who was left out of the starting line-up today."

 

"The ref was vertically 15 yards away."

 

"Football's always easier when you've got the ball."

 

"It's like a toaster, the ref's shirt pocket. Every time there's a tackle, up pops a yellow card."

 

"I'd love to be a mole on the wall in the Liverpool dressing room at half-time."

 

"The game has gone rather scrappy as both sides realise they could win this match or lose it."

 

"I'm not disappointed - just disappointed."

 

"There's a slight doubt about only one player, and that's Tony Adams, who definitely won't be playing tomorrow."

 

"I came to Nantes two years ago and it's much the same today, except that it's totally different."

 

"We managed to wrong a few rights."

 

"A tremendous strike which hit the defender full on the arm - and it nearly came off."

 

"That decision, for me, was almost certainly definitely wrong."

 

"Danny Tiatto is not going to make a mistake on purpose."

 

"He'll also be very dangerous from set-pieces. That means he'll be a threat from free-kicks and corners in the final third of the field."

 

"Shaun Wright-Phillips has got a heart as big as his size, which isn't big, but his heart's bigger than that."

 

 

- Kevin Keegan.

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"Argentina won't be at Euro 2000 because they're from South America."

 

"They're the second best team in the world and there's no higher praise than that."

 

"One of his strengths is not heading."

 

"He's using his strength. And that is his strength, his strength."

 

"My father was a miner and he worked down a mine."

 

"Hungary is very similar to Bulgaria. I know they're different countries..."

 

"England have the best fans in the world and Scotland's fans are second to none."

 

"Against France we'll have to be at our best both technically, tactically and spirit-wise."

 

"You can't do better than go away from home and get a draw."

 

"We deserved to win this game after hammering them 0-0 in the first half."

 

"I don't think there's anyone bigger or smaller than Maradona."

 

"The 33 or 34 year olds will be 36 or 37 by the time the next World Cup comes around, if they're not careful."

 

"Maine Road was a great football stadium but as time moved on it stayed where it is..."

 

"Chile have three options - they could win or they could lose."

 

"Gary always weighed up his options, especially when he had no choice."

 

"The tide is very much in our court now."

 

"The Germans only have one player under 22, and he's 23."

 

"You don't get two chances at this level, or at any other level for that matter."

 

"He can't speak Turkey, but you can tell he's delighted."

 

"Batistuta is very good at pulling off defenders."

 

"There'll be no siestas in Madrid tonight."

 

"It's understandable that people are keeping one eye on the pot and another up the chimney."

 

"England can end the millennium as it started - as the greatest football nation in the world."

 

"I know what is around the corner - I just don't know where the corner is. But the onus is on us to perform and we must control the bandwagon."

 

"They compare Steve McManaman to Steve Heighway and he's nothing like him, but I can see why - it's because he's a bit different..."

 

"The good news for Nigeria is that they're two-nil down very early in the game..."

 

"Despite his white boots, he has real pace..."

 

"That would have been a goal if it wasn't saved."

 

"Goalkeepers aren't born today until they're in their late 2Os or 3Os."

 

"The substitute is about to come on - he's a player who was left out of the starting line-up today."

 

"The ref was vertically 15 yards away."

 

"Football's always easier when you've got the ball."

 

"It's like a toaster, the ref's shirt pocket. Every time there's a tackle, up pops a yellow card."

 

"I'd love to be a mole on the wall in the Liverpool dressing room at half-time."

 

"The game has gone rather scrappy as both sides realise they could win this match or lose it."

 

"I'm not disappointed - just disappointed."

 

"There's a slight doubt about only one player, and that's Tony Adams, who definitely won't be playing tomorrow."

 

"I came to Nantes two years ago and it's much the same today, except that it's totally different."

 

"We managed to wrong a few rights."

 

"A tremendous strike which hit the defender full on the arm - and it nearly came off."

 

"That decision, for me, was almost certainly definitely wrong."

 

"Danny Tiatto is not going to make a mistake on purpose."

 

"He'll also be very dangerous from set-pieces. That means he'll be a threat from free-kicks and corners in the final third of the field."

 

"Shaun Wright-Phillips has got a heart as big as his size, which isn't big, but his heart's bigger than that."

 

 

- Kevin Keegan.

 

Great, more homphobia.

 

Just what this forum needs. :?

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Thats pretty disgusting, and IMO you should be ashamed.

 

This thread needs to be locked before someone has the idea of starting one which is based around footballers names which sound a bit like they are related to homosexuality (apart from Michael Gash - not really sure what I was thinking of? A man gash I suppose) and bears the title of a man who has made an entire career out of making puns and comedy from puns related to homosexuality and who is a homosexual. If that were to happen it would be a sure sign that this forum is a haven for the gay haters.

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This thread needs to be locked before someone has the idea of starting one which is based around footballers names which sound a bit like they are related to homosexuality (apart from Michael Gash - not really sure what I was thinking of? A man gash I suppose) and bears the title of a man who has made an entire career out of making puns and comedy from puns related to homosexuality and who is a homosexual. If that were to happen it would be a sure sign that this forum is a haven for the gay haters.

 

Stop trying to get my threads locked, I like this one. Lock the other 2 tonight fair enough, but leave this one.

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This thread needs to be locked before someone has the idea of starting one which is based around footballers names which sound a bit like they are related to homosexuality (apart from Michael Gash - not really sure what I was thinking of? A man gash I suppose) and bears the title of a man who has made an entire career out of making puns and comedy from puns related to homosexuality and who is a homosexual. If that were to happen it would be a sure sign that this forum is a haven for the gay haters.

 

If anything i would suggest you were actually celebrating homosexuality ? For its variety and exuberance ??

 

The fact that it was locked would IMO suggest that it was wrongfully thought off as an attack ? Or even misplaced banter ? Why you would immediately jump to this conclusion is beyond me.

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If anything i would suggest you were actually celebrating homosexuality ? For its variety and exuberance ??

 

The fact that it was locked would IMO suggest that it was wrongfully thought off as an attack ? Or even misplaced banter ? Why you would immediately jump to this conclusion is beyond me.

 

If you had the personality and wit of a woodlouse?

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Perhaps not alone, more like in the minority of one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This was a very poor attempt at humour by trying to make up a quote similar to all those above, sorry :blush:

 

Don't be hard on yourself mate, you're young, you won't geit right for a number of years yet but we all had to start somewhere.

 

A better one (for a beginner at least) would have been "Welcome to LoneleyVille - Population - You.

 

Or you could have done this for added impact and to distract from your actually quite ****e sense of humour:

 

 

images%3Fq%3Dpopulation%2Byou%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-GB:official%26biw%3D1280%26bih%3D658%26tbs%3Disch:1&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=276&vpy=35&dur=1168&hovh=267&hovw=189&tx=115&ty=168&oei=5ahlTYG_KZKwhAeM7-35BQ&page=1&ndsp=28&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:0images%3Fq%3Dpopulation%2Byou%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-GB:official%26biw%3D1280%26bih%3D658%26tbs%3Disch:1&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=276&vpy=35&dur=1168&hovh=267&hovw=189&tx=115&ty=168&oei=5ahlTYG_KZKwhAeM7-35BQ&page=1&ndsp=28&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:0images%3Fq%3Dpopulation%2Byou%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-GB:official%26biw%3D1280%26bih%3D658%26tbs%3Disch:10%2C761&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=136&vpy=355&dur=2081&hovh=212&hovw=219&tx=141&ty=172&oei=5ahlTYG_KZKwhAeM7-35BQ&page=3&ndsp=18&ved=1t:429,r:0,s:44&biw=1280&bih=658http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://memearchive.net/memerial.net/page/1880.jpg&imgrefurl=http://memerial.net/&usg=__qI0wOozd0y1V3AS-rgZ-iWDvPaA=&h=266&w=274&sz=21&hl=en&start=44&zoom=1&tbnid=eaqzWDBtocdaWM:&tbnh=154&tbnw=154&ei=R6llTZG2L4m04AbzlYXhCA&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dpopulation%2Byou%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-GB:official%26biw%3D1280%26bih%3D658%26tbs%3Disch:10%2C761&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=136&vpy=355&dur=2081&hovh=212&hovw=219&tx=141&ty=172&oei=5ahlTYG_KZKwhAeM7-35BQ&page=3&ndsp=18&ved=1t:429,r:0,s:44&biw=1280&bih=658

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"When David O'Leary received his pay-off from Leeds United the cheque didn't bounce, the club did"

 

Tommy Docherty.

 

Surely the most wittiest response to a game of football has to be 'Super-Cally-go-ballistic, Celtic are atrocious', after Inverness Caledonian Thistle beat Glasgow Celtic in, I think, the Scottish Cup. about six,or seven years ago.

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"We all know we will p*ss it up the wall against Exeter and Dagenham" Alpine Saints after beating Huddersfield 4-1

"this Ashes series will end up like the last one 5-0 to Australia" Alpine Saint after the first day of the first Ashes test (okay not football but still quality)

"In league one Rickie Lambert would score 30 goals, Torres will score about 10" Le God Third Coming

"we can sign any player we want and are the most attractive team for any player outside those playing in the champions league" Le God Third Coming

"Rickie Lambert should be in the England world cup squad" Tactics

"Saints would beat England" numerous posters, before the world cup

Edited by Turkish
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This thread needs to be locked before someone has the idea of starting one which is based around footballers names which sound a bit like they are related to homosexuality (apart from Michael Gash - not really sure what I was thinking of? A man gash I suppose) and bears the title of a man who has made an entire career out of making puns and comedy from puns related to homosexuality and who is a homosexual. If that were to happen it would be a sure sign that this forum is a haven for the gay haters.

 

Darren Bent

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WOW...what an impact this guy is having on our club already...

I was not too unhappy that pearson went but was dreading this set up when it first arrived as it stank of Lowe wanting to do this to make a point as he wanted this set up two years ago...and harped on about using the kids etc..

 

but boy, Jan the man sure knows what he is doing BIG TIME....puts any pearson/burley team into pale insignificance...

 

also, with some fans bemusement, he even states he wants another striker and after today, fans are agreeing with him...

 

I went to the west ham game and left the ground shell shocked on how well we played and the style.I just hope those 'stay awayers' come back and see what brilliant football he has produced with a bunch of reserves and kids..

 

hats off to you sir, well done and thanks for all this good stuff we are seeing..

 

I think I speak on most saints fans behalf when I say we are litterally gob smacked on how well you have transformed our club...:D

 

Delldays

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WOW...what an impact this guy is having on our club already...

I was not too unhappy that pearson went but was dreading this set up when it first arrived as it stank of Lowe wanting to do this to make a point as he wanted this set up two years ago...and harped on about using the kids etc..

 

but boy, Jan the man sure knows what he is doing BIG TIME....puts any pearson/burley team into pale insignificance...

 

also, with some fans bemusement, he even states he wants another striker and after today, fans are agreeing with him...

 

I went to the west ham game and left the ground shell shocked on how well we played and the style.I just hope those 'stay awayers' come back and see what brilliant football he has produced with a bunch of reserves and kids..

 

hats off to you sir, well done and thanks for all this good stuff we are seeing..

 

I think I speak on most saints fans behalf when I say we are litterally gob smacked on how well you have transformed our club...:D

 

Delldays

 

That is surely the greatest single post of all time, still makes me laugh now. :lol::lol:

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"FWIW I heard that Wilde resigned because there was too much media and fan pressure focusing on the investment issue and that this was putting the whole Board under pressure. He resigned to take the heat off the club and its executives and allow them to get on with the job while he carried on working on the investment issue in the background and out of the spotlight. The statement that he resigned because of a failure to raise finance was only issued to try and reduce fans unrealistic expectations. IMO, it was through Wilde's efforts, that PA was clearly aware that his approach would be welcomed rather than shunned and this is a big factor when looking at a potential acquisition. We now know that PA had contact with the club several months ago, before MW's resignation. IMO it is down to Wilde that we now have this opportunity to stabilise and secure the long term future of the club. If this takeover goes through I think we all owe him bigtime."

 

SaintMarc, Saintsweb Forum, c.2008

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Good morning everyone

 

Today is going to be a decisive day in the future of the Club in my opinion.

 

Much work is going on as we speak to resolve the legal issues which caused the delay with our takeover. At the same time, work is also being done to put in place a contingency arrangement so that, with the permission of the new owner, funds can be released to pay staffs wages. Whilst the legal issue is more critical, on a more personal note the wages are at the forefront of my mind.

 

I am aware of some very unhelpful rumours and questions about Mr Fialka and his colleagues - he choose to speak out yesterday to add not just substance, but weight to our position, with particular focus on the League issue. That continues to be worked on this morning. Quite where and why these rumours have originated is anyones guess, and I would have to seriously question anyones motives for trying to discredit the guy who approached us to try and save the Club. Needless to say, there is no foundation in any such rumours, as will be demonstrated when this deal is completed. But to speculate that our new owner in waiting lives with his parents is nothing short of ridiculous (not that living with your parents is of course ridiculous). Anyway, from the start of this, I pledged to you all one thing. Unity. And that is what is needed to overcome the obstacles in our way. I will not lower our standards and have a war of words with anyone, least of all a newspaper. That is what freedom of speech is all about - but I have reminded that newspaper this morning that they should do research of their own rather than rely upon others feeding them information before the print inaccurate stories. Clearly we are aware of other groups apparent interest so we are concentrating on the important job of resolving the issues in hand.

 

All the best for now, and keep the faith, its time to complete the deal.

 

Regards

Tony

26-6-2009

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Surely the most wittiest response to a game of football has to be 'Super-Cally-go-ballistic, Celtic are atrocious', after Inverness Caledonian Thistle beat Glasgow Celtic in, I think, the Scottish Cup. about six,or seven years ago.

 

7 Years ago..... more like 13/14 years ago!

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Good morning everyone

 

Today is going to be a decisive day in the future of the Club in my opinion.

 

Much work is going on as we speak to resolve the legal issues which caused the delay with our takeover. At the same time, work is also being done to put in place a contingency arrangement so that, with the permission of the new owner, funds can be released to pay staffs wages. Whilst the legal issue is more critical, on a more personal note the wages are at the forefront of my mind.

 

I am aware of some very unhelpful rumours and questions about Mr Fialka and his colleagues - he choose to speak out yesterday to add not just substance, but weight to our position, with particular focus on the League issue. That continues to be worked on this morning. Quite where and why these rumours have originated is anyones guess, and I would have to seriously question anyones motives for trying to discredit the guy who approached us to try and save the Club. Needless to say, there is no foundation in any such rumours, as will be demonstrated when this deal is completed. But to speculate that our new owner in waiting lives with his parents is nothing short of ridiculous (not that living with your parents is of course ridiculous). Anyway, from the start of this, I pledged to you all one thing. Unity. And that is what is needed to overcome the obstacles in our way. I will not lower our standards and have a war of words with anyone, least of all a newspaper. That is what freedom of speech is all about - but I have reminded that newspaper this morning that they should do research of their own rather than rely upon others feeding them information before the print inaccurate stories. Clearly we are aware of other groups apparent interest so we are concentrating on the important job of resolving the issues in hand.

 

All the best for now, and keep the faith, its time to complete the deal.

 

Regards

Tony

26-6-2009

 

What a ****.

 

(Not you, Trousers).

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