SNSUN Posted 26 November, 2010 Posted 26 November, 2010 Is this your excuse for all the white patches on your jeans?
Lighthouse Posted 26 November, 2010 Posted 26 November, 2010 Find someone you don't like and whitewash their car.
thesaint sfc Posted 26 November, 2010 Author Posted 26 November, 2010 Is this your excuse for all the white patches on your jeans? No, but it is the reason your car is now white.
EastleighSoulBoy Posted 26 November, 2010 Posted 26 November, 2010 Big mistake. Gonna spoil another Banksy then?
lettuce Posted 26 November, 2010 Posted 26 November, 2010 I got stung by a bee the other day... 5 quid for a jar of honey!
Lighthouse Posted 26 November, 2010 Posted 26 November, 2010 Bought some rohypnol the other day and on the back it said "best before date".
saintscottofthenortham Posted 26 November, 2010 Posted 26 November, 2010 Bought a load of Tampons the other day, No strings attached. So I have tied tinsel to them instead... There for the Christmas period only.
Saint-scooby Posted 27 November, 2010 Posted 27 November, 2010 How do you get a fat woman into bed Piece of cake..
warsash saint Posted 27 November, 2010 Posted 27 November, 2010 When I was younger my Grandma used to rub lard into my Grandpa's back when he was ill. He went down hill fast after that
SO16_Saint Posted 27 November, 2010 Posted 27 November, 2010 Just bought the Mrs an artificial leg for Christmas. It's not her main present, just a stocking filler!
Durleyfos Posted 28 November, 2010 Posted 28 November, 2010 I bought a dog of a blacksmith yesterday. Took it home and let it out into the garden. It made a bolt for the gate.
Big John Posted 28 November, 2010 Posted 28 November, 2010 caught my neighbours dog humping a cabbage on our vegetable patch this morning. my neighbour reckons his eyesight is going, he mistook it for a collie
Liquidshokk Posted 28 November, 2010 Posted 28 November, 2010 The last two just made me cry with laughter... But I think that may be the bottle of wine....
Big John Posted 28 November, 2010 Posted 28 November, 2010 I bought a dog of a blacksmith yesterday. Took it home and let it out into the garden. It made a bolt for the gate. wtf is a 'dog of a blacksmith' please? is it an ugly blacksmith or maybe it is a blacksmith who reneged on a deal or suchlike? no offence intended.
scotty Posted 28 November, 2010 Posted 28 November, 2010 wtf is a 'dog of a blacksmith' please? is it an ugly blacksmith or maybe it is a blacksmith who reneged on a deal or suchlike? no offence intended. nice post
saintscottofthenortham Posted 28 November, 2010 Posted 28 November, 2010 wtf is a 'dog of a blacksmith' please? is it an ugly blacksmith or maybe it is a blacksmith who reneged on a deal or suchlike? no offence intended.
Lighthouse Posted 28 November, 2010 Posted 28 November, 2010 caught my neighbours dog humping a cabbage on our vegetable patch this morning. my neighbour reckons his eyesight is going, he mistook it for a collie Without the apostrophe in "neighbour's" that took on a completely different meaning for a minute there.
Big John Posted 28 November, 2010 Posted 28 November, 2010 i do have more than one neighbour. does that make it make sense?
Lighthouse Posted 28 November, 2010 Posted 28 November, 2010 I thought you had caught more than one neighbour - dog humping (I assumed you met doggy style) - a cabbage. Painted a slightly odd image in my head.
Big John Posted 28 November, 2010 Posted 28 November, 2010 I thought you had caught more than one neighbour - dog humping (I assumed you met doggy style) - a cabbage. Painted a slightly odd image in my head. a challenging position in which to meet someone, one might have prior knowledge of the other person, especially as we are neighbours. more fun with a stranger granted but i think we should leaf it at that.
Lighthouse Posted 28 November, 2010 Posted 28 November, 2010 a challenging position in which to meet someone, one might have prior knowledge of the other person, especially as we are neighbours. more fun with a stranger granted but i think we should leaf it at that. Your neighbours are both deciduous trees?
Big John Posted 29 November, 2010 Posted 29 November, 2010 /\ yes, i think it is that that makes them so poplar around here.
SNSUN Posted 30 November, 2010 Posted 30 November, 2010 I bought some aftershave that smells like breadcrumbs. Birds love it. Can someone please send my aunt a Christmas card? Send it to: Lily Loves, 2b, Well Rd, Tillet, Herts.
hamster Posted 1 December, 2010 Posted 1 December, 2010 I treated myself to a bottle of that new scent for men 'come to me'. Got a slap at work today when i asked my boss 'does this smell like cum to you'?
dronskisaint Posted 13 December, 2010 Posted 13 December, 2010 Paul McCartney got Heather Mills a plane for Xmas.....................
hamster Posted 13 December, 2010 Posted 13 December, 2010 /\ sorry don't get it? What do you call a pig with wings?
ericofarabia Posted 14 December, 2010 Posted 14 December, 2010 /\ sorry don't get it? ? Think of wood work rather than aeroplanes!! Her version of waxing, keeps splinters at bay!!!! Shortly after his messy divorce settlement with Heather Mills, Macca was being interviewed about the possibility of ever getting married again. The Interviewer asked he was ever likely to go down on one knee again .... to which he replied ..... not bloody likely, but have please show some respect and call her Heather!!!
dronskisaint Posted 15 December, 2010 Posted 15 December, 2010 When asked about his divorce from Heather Mills it was suggested that she was unstable. Macca agreed but ventured that a beermat usually sorted the problem...
thesaint sfc Posted 15 December, 2010 Author Posted 15 December, 2010 That's disgraceful. You should be ashamed of yourself.
SNSUN Posted 15 December, 2010 Posted 15 December, 2010 The Interviewer asked he was ever likely to go down on one knee again .... to which he replied ..... not bloody likely, but have please show some respect and call her Heather!!! Lol'd at that one.
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