The Day You Took The Mrs....

[jawillwill]

I took my girlfirend to the football once because I have a girlfriend who is a girl and came to the football with me once despite the fact that she was a girl. We had sex at the back of block 2 when it was closed. The stewards let us up there because my girlfriend was so hot. And a girl.

[LA77]

I took my girlfirend to the football once because I have a girlfriend who is a girl and came to the football with me once despite the fact that she was a girl. We had sex at the back of block 2 when it was closed. The stewards let us up there because my girlfriend was so hot. And a girl.

 

Did the reindeer hat mong look at your weener and shout "pork pork pork"?

[pap]

First time I took my missus to a game was at Anfield, during the 1997-98 season. She's a scouser and a Red, and stood in the Saints end with me.

 

Any thought she had of cheering Liverpool from the Saints end quickly disappeared when a Sotonian in a Liverpool shirt cheered Liverpool's opening goal. All the people around started screaming "you scouse c*nt" and the stewards promptly removed him from the stand.

 

We won 3-2. I did my jacket up on the walk back home, tho

[Turkish]

turkish, you dont have a very high opinion of the female of our species, do you.

 

 

(funny as f*ck tho )

 

I think men have to take a lot of the responsibility though. Women generally aren't interested in football and if they they are either closet lesbians or they feel they should be to try to fit and give them something to talk about that isn't periods or babies or so they can meet and get attention from men. If the men treated single woman at football with the contempt they deserve, ie ignoring them instead of sniffing round them like flies round sh*t like you see time and time again, it'd soon stamp out the single woman attending issue

 

As for the pussy blokes that allow their women to come with them and in even more disturbing cases, actively encourage it, they really do need to take a long hard look in the mirror. Obviously women want to go with their man to football as a lot are so insecure they cannot let their chap out of their sight for fear he'll enjoy himself doing something without them and realise how truely pathetic and needy they are. Equally the men who encourge their women to come are surely only doing this out of fear that once they have left the house, their precious spouse will be getting nailed within 10 minutes by the first bloke she meets at the shops. Of course if the weak imbicle put her in her place at the early days of thier realtionship, which, seeing as how pathetic they both are, is only destined to fail anyway, he'd neither have the problem of having to tolerate her at football, or worrying that she is being slammed by anyone with a c*ck, as she would know she is lucky to have man like him.

Edited 9 September, 2010 by Turkish

[Ash]

turkish, you dont have a very high opinion of the female of our species, do you.

Sod the PC brigade, just call him a bender.

[SimonRichards]

I took my Mrs on our first date to the Dell. We were playing Aston Villa and we won 2 nil. This was November 2000.

 

This was her first match and she has since been to loads inc some away ones

[Turkish]

I took my Mrs on our first date to the Dell. We were playing Aston Villa and we won 2 nil. This was November 2000.

 

This was her first match and she has since been to loads inc some away ones

 

the fact that your missus had never been to a game before going out with you speaks volumes and confirms the theory.

[Marsdinho]

I think men have to take a lot of the responsibility though. Women generally aren't interested in football and if they they are either closet lesbians or they feel they should be to try to fit and give them something to talk about that isn't periods or babies or so they can meet and get attention from men. If the men treated single woman at football with the contempt they deserve, ie ignoring them instead of sniffing round them like flies round sh*t like you see time and time again, it'd soon stamp out the single woman attending issue

 

As for the pussy blokes that allow their women to come with them and in even more disturbing cases, actively encourage it, they really do need to take a long hard look in the mirror. Obviously women want to go with their man to football as a lot are so insecure they cannot let their chap out of their sight for fear he'll enjoy himself doing something without them and realise how truely pathetic and needy they are. Equally the men who encourge their women to come are surely only doing this out of fear that once they have left the house, their precious spouse will be getting nailed within 10 minutes by the first bloke she meets at the shops. Of course if the weak imbicle put her in her place at the early days of thier realtionship, which, seeing as how pathetic they both are, is only destined to fail anyway, he'd neither have the problem of having to tolerate her at football, or worrying that she is being slammed by anyone with a c*ck, as she would know she is lucky to have man like him.

 

Amen brother.

[kpturner]

I've been to matches at St Mary's with 3 exes and my wife.

All at the same time? Were they all female?

[angelman]

My Mrs is banned!

 

Taken her to 3 games (some years ago)

 

Chelsea 3 Saints 0

QPR 3 Saints 0

Wimbledon 3 Saints 1

[kpturner]

I wanted to see Saints play Coventry away in the FA Cup in the early 1990's and nobody else wanted to go - so my missus volunteered to accompany me (no kids in those days). She stuffed a coat up her jumper to look pregnant to get us through the throngs quickly - it actually worked. During the match she was astonished that all these grown men (and women) where chanting like schoolboys. She was particularly gob-smacked by, and I quote, "brainless chants like 'Shearer, Shearer'" being crowed by adults while waving one of their arms backwards and forwards in time with the chant - pointing at the subject of their adulation. Shearer, by the way, scored a penalty in the second half to get us a replay. I tried to point out that this was normal behaviour for adults at a football match. She took the view that people who did such things must have had some sort of lobotomy and couldn't believe that it was normal. She genuinely thought that all the noise you hear while watching football on telly was just added by the broadcaster for effect, a bit like canned laughter in a **** sit-com.

 

I must admit, I have been extremely self-conscious about singing and chanting at a football match ever since. She has never bother to accompany me again - she prefers more intelligent company on a Saturday afternoon....like the kids.

Edited 10 September, 2010 by kpturner

[Saint Mikey]

I had to let a bird go, as she threatened to get a Season Ticket next to me this season! Have now got a bird who has very little interest in footy. Although, should there be an interest showed, I'm liking the suggestion above about choosing a toss game.

[Turkish]

I had to let a bird go, as she threatened to get a Season Ticket next to me this season! Have now got a bird who has very little interest in footy. Although, should there be an interest showed, I'm liking the suggestion above about choosing a toss game.

 

No, just tell her straight, she is not welcome. My incumbent knows the score, she doesn't even dare asking anymore.

[suewhistle]

Anyway, any good anecdotes out there, and of course for our lady viewers you can tell us about how you dragged your hubby down...

 

Not necessarily....

[Andyb1]

spoken by a true single man that struggles with the ladies?

[suewhistle]

I think men have to take a lot of the responsibility though. Women generally aren't interested in football and if they they are either closet lesbians

 

********, I'm not in the closet at all, you slimy little turd. Anyway, I don't mind men and enjoy the company of many, but not the sort of wildly insecure and offensive sort that you represent. There are quite a few posters here whose company I reckon would be interesting and I think would enjoy a drink with me, but they tend to have a little more confidence in themselves than you do, and a lot more intelligence.

 

Jesus - "a lot are so insecure" - the only person round here who fits that description is yourself.

[Turkish]

********, I'm not in the closet at all, you slimy little turd. Anyway, I don't mind men and enjoy the company of many, but not the sort of wildly insecure and offensive sort that you represent. There are quite a few posters here whose company I reckon would be interesting and I think would enjoy a drink with me, but they tend to have a little more confidence in themselves than you do, and a lot more intelligence.

 

Jesus - "a lot are so insecure" - the only person round here who fits that description is yourself.

 

 

Stop advertising yourself on here. Are you really that unattractive that even the desperate male types that sniff round every woman at football wont even touch you?

Edited 10 September, 2010 by Turkish

[AussieDog]

I think men have to take a lot of the responsibility though. Women generally aren't interested in football and if they they are either closet lesbians or they feel they should be to try to fit and give them something to talk about that isn't periods or babies or so they can meet and get attention from men. If the men treated single woman at football with the contempt they deserve, ie ignoring them instead of sniffing round them like flies round sh*t like you see time and time again, it'd soon stamp out the single woman attending issue

 

As for the pussy blokes that allow their women to come with them and in even more disturbing cases, actively encourage it, they really do need to take a long hard look in the mirror. Obviously women want to go with their man to football as a lot are so insecure they cannot let their chap out of their sight for fear he'll enjoy himself doing something without them and realise how truely pathetic and needy they are. Equally the men who encourge their women to come are surely only doing this out of fear that once they have left the house, their precious spouse will be getting nailed within 10 minutes by the first bloke she meets at the shops. Of course if the weak imbicle put her in her place at the early days of thier realtionship, which, seeing as how pathetic they both are, is only destined to fail anyway, he'd neither have the problem of having to tolerate her at football, or worrying that she is being slammed by anyone with a c*ck, as she would know she is lucky to have man like him.

 

 

I think it's only fair that I let her come with me, as she just finds me irresistible and wants us to share everything enjoyable. Including her girlfriends (another reason why I don't want to leave Australia - the women are so liberated over here!).

 

Why should I deny her those pleasures??

[Deano6]

I've never done her up the arse, but I let her put a finger up my bum once.

[Pilsmer]

I've taken my missus to a couple of games over the past couple of seasons.

 

The first one was Charlton away in 08-09 season. She had a good grasp of the songs but refused to join in the chants about Martin Cranie being a Skate c**t because apparently "It's just mean picking on one person like that". She stayed resolute even in the face of my argument "But he is a Skate c**t."

 

The second match was that awful performance up at Tranmere last season. After the game, when we were walking back to the car she innocently turns to me and said "Your team isn't very good, is it?" I've always admired her powers of observation.

 

Whenever 'Arry's on the telly I only have to look at her for her to chant the mantra "He's a twitchy, baggy faced c**t". Girls like that don't come along too often so I went and married her.

[suewhistle]

Told you Turkish was thick...

[bender]

I had a second date last year with an ex at SMS, went for lunch prior, think we drew the game, anyway she was quite dangerous, but loads of fun. Still miss her now...

 

Did AP take her off your hands?

[radders82]

Then there's the ones that just go for a the hot dogs ummm!!

[cellone]

The wife has no intrest in football or fishing and I've none in sewing. Match made in heaven.

[charliegeorgesflymo]

up the a*£e - she still hasn't forgiven me

[Tractor_Saint]

Women at football generally fall into two categories.

 

Surely this isn't a serious post right? How the hell have you got yourself a woman? Either your 'incumbent' is a bloke or you went and bought one from abroad. You're the kind of bloke that gives all us decent folk a bad name. I'd even have said that you must have been p1ssed when you wrote this but unless you were on shift work or an alcoholic (? potential) I'm having to assume you're just sad at 9 of a morning.

 

PS Do you like hitting women as well? Wouldn't be surprised.

[JB]

You've got it in one Tractor_Saint. Turkish is an alcohol guzzling, shift working, Thai bride beating, Phil Collins listener who doesn't even know the name of Saints' kit man.

[LGTL]

I took her to two games last season, Millwall and Leeds. Doubt she'll go again.

[Turkish]

Surely this isn't a serious post right? How the hell have you got yourself a woman? Either your 'incumbent' is a bloke or you went and bought one from abroad. You're the kind of bloke that gives all us decent folk a bad name. I'd even have said that you must have been p1ssed when you wrote this but unless you were on shift work or an alcoholic (? potential) I'm having to assume you're just sad at 9 of a morning.

 

PS Do you like hitting women as well? Wouldn't be surprised.

 

Come on Tractor Saint, if your views on football management are carried over into your personal life, you think you should be slotting one in Kelly Brook, and she'd be grateful.

[Turkish]

Told you Turkish was thick...

 

you seem a bit stoppy today sweetheart. Dont tell me, you either haven't had it for a while (unsurprisingly, seeing as how you are touting yourself on here for a date and think people would find you interesting), or it's time of the month. Dont worry, nothing a dildo cant sort out, seems thats what you seem to have to settle for.

Edited 10 September, 2010 by Turkish

[Turkish]

You've got it in one Tractor_Saint. Turkish is an alcohol guzzling, shift working, Thai bride beating, Phil Collins listener who doesn't even know the name of Saints' kit man.

 

Time of the month?

[Turkish]

Surely this isn't a serious post right? How the hell have you got yourself a woman? Either your 'incumbent' is a bloke or you went and bought one from abroad. You're the kind of bloke that gives all us decent folk a bad name. I'd even have said that you must have been p1ssed when you wrote this but unless you were on shift work or an alcoholic (? potential) I'm having to assume you're just sad at 9 of a morning.

 

PS Do you like hitting women as well? Wouldn't be surprised.

 

 

Lol at this comment, give you decent blokes a bad name?! :lol:

 

Come on soppy bollo*ks, you do that easily yourself with your noncey ways. If a girl wants a yes man, then look no further. You might the odd sympathy sh*g because women feel sorry for you but long term wise do me favour, any women that has to put up with your deluded bleating for anymore than 20 seconds would be getting nailed by the first bloke she meets with a c*ck longer than 2 inches. You know it's true, in fact, i bet you're currently single and have already had a bird cheat on you.

Edited 10 September, 2010 by Turkish

[Tractor_Saint]

Lol at this comment, give you decent blokes a bad name?! :lol:

 

Come on soppy bollo*ks, you do that easily yourself with your noncey ways. If a girl wants a yes man, then look no further. You might the odd sympathy sh*g because women feel sorry for you but long term wise do me favour, any women that has to put up with your deluded bleating for anymore than 20 seconds would be getting nailed by the first bloke she meets with a c*ck longer than 2 inches. You know it's true, in fact, i bet you're currently single and have already had a bird cheat on you.

 

You make me laugh. Thanks

[ericofarabia]

Mrs EoA has only been to one match - Brighton Away 1980 ish.

 

We needed a lift and she didn't realise that 'do you want to go to Brighton next week' , meant driving me and 3 mates to see a football game!! We had only been 'courting' since about a week after the end of the previous season and footie hadn't come up in any conversations!!

 

Fair do's, she agreed and took us, with a pub stop on the way there and back. She was more interested in the very animated banter going on between the two sets of fans, and thought the 'SeaWeed' retort to them singing 'SeaGulls' (after we'd explained why they were singing Seagulls in the first place!!) was very witty!! She wasn't so keen when we nearly got caught up in a bit of a skirmish after the game though.

 

So, I haven't actually ever taken my wife to a game .... she took me... LOL

[Turkish]

Mrs EoA has only been to one match - Brighton Away 1980 ish.

 

We needed a lift and she didn't realise that 'do you want to go to Brighton next week' , meant driving me and 3 mates to see a football game!! We had only been 'courting' since about a week after the end of the previous season and footie hadn't come up in any conversations!!

 

Fair do's, she agreed and took us, with a pub stop on the way there and back. She was more interested in the very animated banter going on between the two sets of fans, and thought the 'SeaWeed' retort to them singing 'SeaGulls' (after we'd explained why they were singing Seagulls in the first place!!) was very witty!! She wasn't so keen when we nearly got caught up in a bit of a skirmish after the game though.

 

So, I haven't actually ever taken my wife to a game .... she took me... LOL

 

I hope you let her give you a blow job when you got home too.

[landford.saint]

You've got it in one Tractor_Saint. Turkish is an alcohol guzzling, shift working, Thai bride beating, Phil Collins listener who doesn't even know the name of Saints' kit man.

 

listens to Phil Collins....... Now that IS low.

[Turkish]

listens to Phil Collins....... Now that IS low.

 

i take it you dont like Phil Collins? I've been a big Genesis fan ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke. Before that, I really didn't understand any of their work. Too artsy, too intellectual. It was on Duke where Phil Collins' presence became more apparent. I think Invisible Touch was the group's undisputed masterpiece. It's an epic meditation on intangibility. At the same time, it deepens and enriches the meaning of the preceding three albums. Listen to the brilliant ensemble playing of Banks, Collins and Rutherford. You can practically hear every nuance of every instrument. In terms of lyrical craftsmanship, the sheer songwriting, this album hits a new peak of professionalism. Take the lyrics to Land of Confusion. In this song, Phil Collins addresses the problems of abusive political authority. In Too Deep is the most moving pop song of the 1980s, about monogamy and commitment. The song is extremely uplifting. Their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as anything I've heard in rock. Phil Collins' solo career seems to be more commercial and therefore more satisfying, in a narrower way. Especially songs like In the Air Tonight and Against All Odds. But I also think Phil Collins works best within the confines of the group, than as a solo artist, and I stress the word artist. Listen to Sussudio, a great, great song, a personal favorite.

[The9]

First time I took my missus to a game was at Anfield, during the 1997-98 season. She's a scouser and a Red, and stood in the Saints end with me.

 

Any thought she had of cheering Liverpool from the Saints end quickly disappeared when a Sotonian in a Liverpool shirt cheered Liverpool's opening goal. All the people around started screaming "you scouse c*nt" and the stewards promptly removed him from the stand.

 

We won 3-2. I did my jacket up on the walk back home, tho

 

Actually I had pretty much the same experience on 01.01.01 (Soltvedt scored) but without the swearing.

[LA77]

I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip.

[View From The Top]

i take it you dont like Phil Collins? I've been a big Genesis fan ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke. Before that, I really didn't understand any of their work. Too artsy, too intellectual. It was on Duke where Phil Collins' presence became more apparent. I think Invisible Touch was the group's undisputed masterpiece. It's an epic meditation on intangibility. At the same time, it deepens and enriches the meaning of the preceding three albums. Listen to the brilliant ensemble playing of Banks, Collins and Rutherford. You can practically hear every nuance of every instrument. In terms of lyrical craftsmanship, the sheer songwriting, this album hits a new peak of professionalism. Take the lyrics to Land of Confusion. In this song, Phil Collins addresses the problems of abusive political authority. In Too Deep is the most moving pop song of the 1980s, about monogamy and commitment. The song is extremely uplifting. Their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as anything I've heard in rock. Phil Collins' solo career seems to be more commercial and therefore more satisfying, in a narrower way. Especially songs like In the Air Tonight and Against All Odds. But I also think Phil Collins works best within the confines of the group, than as a solo artist, and I stress the word artist. Listen to Sussudio, a great, great song, a personal favorite.

 

How long have you been waiting to use that?

[Turkish]

There are no more barriers to cross. All I have in common with the uncontrollable and the insane, the vicious and the evil, all the mayhem I have caused and my utter indifference toward it I have now surpassed. My pain is constant and sharp and I do not hope for a better world for anyone, in fact I want my pain to be inflicted on others. I want no one to escape, but even after admitting this there is no catharsis, my punishment continues to elude me and I gain no deeper knowledge of myself; no new knowledge can be extracted from my telling. This confession has meant nothing

[The9]

Whatever happened to Patrick Bateman anyway ?

[Turkish]

Whatever happened to Patrick Bateman anyway ?

 

He got a new bird and stopped going to football. At least he had the decency to do that rather than let her trapse along behind him to matches, he may be a pussy but at least he is one with ethics.

Edited 13 September, 2010 by Turkish

[scotty]

....and turkish wins thread on points, split decision....

[St Matty]

Never heard a saints fan described as a glory hunter before?

[Turkish]

Never heard a saints fan described as a glory hunter before?

 

35,000 that were at Wembley for the JPT final could well be.

[Jonnyboy]

told ya this should be in the muppet show

[surrey1saint]

I don't mind if my Mrs comes to SMS,but if she does I don't see her during the game as she likes to near the front in the Kingsland.

 

My ST seat is in the Northam.So best of both worlds!

[Turkish]

I don't mind if my Mrs comes to SMS,but if she does I don't see her during the game as she likes to near the front in the Kingsland.

 

My ST seat is in the Northam.So best of both worlds!

 

Not really, because no doubt she still expects to go for a drink with you before and/or after so you still have to tolerate that. Then she'll attempt to discuss football intellegently, something a woman is not capable of doing. Regardless of how much you and she think she knows about football, her verdict of which team deserved to win will still be influenced by which had the nicest kit. The only time my incumbent and I discuss football is when she thanks me for letting her watch something else when a game i'm not arsed about watching is on and then she has to earn the right for some female TV time. I'm happy to keep it at that.

Edited 13 September, 2010 by Turkish

[Foxy]

Flew over for a week and took my ex-wife to my first game at St. Marys and her first Saints game. She spent so long deciding what food she wanted at half-time that I watched the start of the second half on a TV on the concourse - and that's how I experienced Fabrice Fernandez goal. Hence an ex-wife.

 

I think taking a lady who was also a Yank might have been sailing a bit close to the windf if you were expecting any sort of football appreciation.

 

Mind you Mrs F was little better. On her first match behavioural highlights included turning round to me when the singing ramped up and asking why men didn't sing like that in church and, on about 75 minutes, saying 'oooh, have they changed ends?'.