Turkish Posted 1 July, 2010 Share Posted 1 July, 2010 After a bit of advise on this one. Got a load of chinese students at the end of our road and never looked at any of them twice, until the other day i saw one in some tight fitting shorts and t-shirt which exposed her pert bum cheeks and toned stomach. I went over for a quick chat and she started flirting with me in her yappy little voice i knew it was obvious she wanted some of what i have got (i dont mean the bottle of lucazade i was drinking) Anyway, since then i cant stop thinking about her, saw her the other day and she gave me a wink and a smile and said 'herro Mister, how are you?' dead flirty like. The only problem with this is she is only 4ft 5 and has got one eye. Is it wierd to have a fantasy about a chinese one eyed midget or is it normal? ANyone else got any wierd fantasies? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hamster Posted 1 July, 2010 Share Posted 1 July, 2010 Did she have an adam's apple? If so, give it a crack, no-one knows how to please a man like a man does. If you are worried about fidelity then I'd steer clear though Turk, you'd have to keep a constant eye on her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smirking_Saint Posted 1 July, 2010 Share Posted 1 July, 2010 I once fantasised i was you Turkish, i woke up and beat the f*ck out of myself until i was back to normal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 1 July, 2010 Author Share Posted 1 July, 2010 I once fantasised i was you Turkish, i woke up and beat the f*ck out of myself until i was back to normal. was it a bit like that scene in fight club? I've done that before. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smirking_Saint Posted 1 July, 2010 Share Posted 1 July, 2010 Pretty much. I also had a dream i was eaten by a penguin, and chased by a giant orange (not at the same time) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 1 July, 2010 Author Share Posted 1 July, 2010 that must have been when you were trying to find your power animal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smirking_Saint Posted 1 July, 2010 Share Posted 1 July, 2010 Yes, when i was being chased by an orange i conjured my power animal, a penguin, to protect me from it's zesty sting. Welcome to my world Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 1 July, 2010 Author Share Posted 1 July, 2010 Yes, when i was being chased by an orange i conjured my power animal, a penguin, to protect me from it's zesty sting. Welcome to my world I had the wierdest dream a little while back. I have a customer in Plymouth which i is on an industrial estate at the end of a council estate. I dreamt that i killed a the purchasing manager from this customer and hid her body under the stairs in on of the council houses outside their offices. I turned up to work the next day in the dream and my boss sacked me because they couldn't have one of their staff going around killing customers so i took another customer to my HR dismissal hearing to fight my corner that she was a customer too and i hadn't killed her yet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smirking_Saint Posted 1 July, 2010 Share Posted 1 July, 2010 I had the wierdest dream a little while back. I have a customer in Plymouth which i is on an industrial estate at the end of a council estate. I dreamt that i killed a the purchasing manager from this customer and hid her body under the stairs in on of the council houses outside their offices. I turned up to work the next day in the dream and my boss sacked me because they couldn't have one of their staff going around killing customers so i took another customer to my HR dismissal hearing to fight my corner that she was a customer too and i hadn't killed her yet. Was their any fruit or a member of the ornathological fraternity involved ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 1 July, 2010 Author Share Posted 1 July, 2010 Was their any fruit or a penguin involved ? no just lots of murders. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smirking_Saint Posted 1 July, 2010 Share Posted 1 July, 2010 no just lots of murders. Meh, thats ok, happens all the time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 1 July, 2010 Author Share Posted 1 July, 2010 Meh, thats ok, happens all the time what about this fantasy then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smirking_Saint Posted 1 July, 2010 Share Posted 1 July, 2010 what about this fantasy then? poking fires and mantlepieces i'd say. Plus she'd probably go like a train, she prob don't get it much, it's probably here train of thought too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 1 July, 2010 Author Share Posted 1 July, 2010 (edited) poking fires and mantlepieces i'd say. Plus she'd probably go like a train, she prob don't get it much, it's probably here train of thought too yeah yeah i get that, but does it make me wierd fantasing over a one eyed chinese midget? What wierd fantasies do you lot have? Edited 1 July, 2010 by Turkish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ponty Posted 1 July, 2010 Share Posted 1 July, 2010 It makes you weird. I'm not sure about wierd. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 1 July, 2010 Author Share Posted 1 July, 2010 It makes you weird. I'm not sure about wierd. come on then ponty, what about you? Ever knocked one out over a bird s***ing on you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saint_stevo Posted 1 July, 2010 Share Posted 1 July, 2010 Crab Lungs has a thing for the jap lasses. Not sure about 1 eyed midgets though. i fantasise about feeding a birds hand into a moving fan during the act Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wes Tender Posted 2 July, 2010 Share Posted 2 July, 2010 The trouble with having a chinese girl, is that half an hour later, you fancy another one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 2 July, 2010 Author Share Posted 2 July, 2010 The trouble with having a chinese girl, is that half an hour later, you fancy another one. Supose another bonus is you'd save on takeaways, although have to make sure any cats or dogs are kept out of harms way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Badger Posted 2 July, 2010 Share Posted 2 July, 2010 The only problem with this is she is only 4ft 5 and has got one eye. Is it wierd to have a fantasy about a chinese one eyed midget or is it normal? ANyone else got any wierd fantasies? Is she ginger as well ? Is your real dilemna that you want her to die her hair ginger but are afraid to ask her ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 2 July, 2010 Author Share Posted 2 July, 2010 Is she ginger as well ? Is your real dilemna that you want her to die her hair ginger but are afraid to ask her ? She is not ginger, who ever heard of a ginger kitchen sink?? Although chinky with ginger/blonde streaks would get the pulse racing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hutch Posted 3 July, 2010 Share Posted 3 July, 2010 On a Health & Safety note, you should ask her to stop winking at you. There's a lot of lamp posts out there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turkish Posted 4 July, 2010 Author Share Posted 4 July, 2010 Crab Lungs has a thing for the jap lasses. Not sure about 1 eyed midgets though. i fantasise about feeding a birds hand into a moving fan during the act I like this fantasy. I've often thought about doing that to someones face. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saintkiptanui Posted 4 July, 2010 Share Posted 4 July, 2010 I fantasise about being back at school and being on stage and singing an Elton John song to my class mates, the one that goes living like lovers rolling like thunder under the covers and everyone thinking I was great, this stems from my thespian days when I played bill sykes at primary school. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hamster Posted 4 July, 2010 Share Posted 4 July, 2010 I fantasise about being back at school and being on stage and singing an Elton John song to my class mates, the one that goes living like lovers rolling like thunder under the covers and everyone thinking I was great, this stems from my thespian days when I played bill sykes at primary school. Did you win? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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