Liquidshokk Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 Perfectly Normal or Plain immature? Discuss. (I for one would be lost without them, and bloated.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liquidshokk Posted 11 March, 2010 Author Share Posted 11 March, 2010 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BadgerBadger Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 Normal, immature and extremely funny IMO Nothing like a sphincter splitting guff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SNSUN Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 Hilarious, but then I am "the most immature 29 year old that (my girlfriend's best friend) has ever met in her life". Not so funny when suffering from a bout of the squits, as I am at present. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liquidshokk Posted 11 March, 2010 Author Share Posted 11 March, 2010 Theres not many things that make me laugh uncontrolably but bottom burps make me feel like a child again and I have to bite my lip when around "grown up" people if someone farts. That said as a serial farter I am completely disgusted if someone farts too close to me lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liquidshokk Posted 11 March, 2010 Author Share Posted 11 March, 2010 Hilarious, but then I am "the most immature 29 year old that (my girlfriend's best friend) has ever met in her life". Not so funny when suffering from a bout of the squits, as I am at present. I feel your pain. Sting ring? :confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hamster Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 *in confidence* this morning mrs h farted at a moment pre coitus interuptous, which she knows full well will be repaid with interest when she least expects it. i telled her that a simple 'not right now' would have sufficed, but she said that that would not have had the same comedic impact! this aftrenoon I was driving with a friend and slipped out a little fart which i expected to go un-noticed, I have not had smelly farts for weeks, but as is the nature of farts, it stank the car out. I couldn;t laugh, but as he said nowt i decided to keep the windows shut to see if he'd crackk, he didn't. Both true stories. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liquidshokk Posted 11 March, 2010 Author Share Posted 11 March, 2010 *in confidence* this morning mrs h farted at a moment pre coitus interuptous, which she knows full well will be repaid with interest when she least expects it. i telled her that a simple 'not right now' would have sufficed, but she said that that would not have had the same comedic impact! this aftrenoon I was driving with a friend and slipped out a little fart which i expected to go un-noticed, I have not had smelly farts for weeks, but as is the nature of farts, it stank the car out. I couldn;t laugh, but as he said nowt i decided to keep the windows shut to see if he'd crackk, he didn't. Both true stories. As a general rule my farts dont stink. But the odd rancid one does catch you by surprise doesnt it lol. Good work keeping the windows shut Bet your friend was actually dieing inside. Or maybe he quite liked it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hamster Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 As a general rule my farts dont stink. But the odd rancid one does catch you by surprise doesnt it lol. Good work keeping the windows shut Bet your friend was actually dieing inside. Or maybe he quite liked it. Just worked out that the pungency must have come from the HSB last night, just the one pint but some beers do that to me. mate never even blinked, top man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suewhistle Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 Ah yes, real ale appeals to my immature side too! Sometimes you can be really good and make it to the cubicle in time, relax and then absolutely trumpet. I've been known to giggle uncontrollably at such events, which of course results in more fanfares. It does depend on diet, but the volume and duration can be amazing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
latter day saint Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 as a side note to this, is it ok to waft the trump upwards so as to test its quality & then waft it towards who ever is unfortunately close by? or is that just gross? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hamster Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 Trumping into ones hand and throwing it in ones partners face can raise a giggle on occasion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SNSUN Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 I feel your pain. Sting ring? :confused: Oh yes. :-( Don't eat Pork Pies past their sell by date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
timebomb Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 My missus released an air biscuit on a flight back from a works do in Tenerife recently. It woke up a sleeping colleague 2 seats away and 3 people had to stand up and move away. She got away with it by blaming someone else in another row - clever girl! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liquidshokk Posted 11 March, 2010 Author Share Posted 11 March, 2010 as a side note to this, is it ok to waft the trump upwards so as to test its quality & then waft it towards who ever is unfortunately close by? or is that just gross? Oh you have to waft. For your own pleasure mind. I don't send it in anyone elsea direction as I know fully well the rage that would come over me if someone did it to me :-) I hate the though of chewing on someones 'air biscuit' lol That's another thing, the names alone that people give this wonderful bodily function crack me up everytime... :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smirking_Saint Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 Once you make someone genuinely throw up from the smell of your guff it makes you feel like a real man. I made my missus throw up through the car window on the way home from a friends once after a pretty intense drink up the night before. Also taking a dump in someone elses hotel room toilet and stinking it out is one of my current favourites when away on a course/uni with the lads IMO sunday morning football farts/sh*ts are the worst. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liquidshokk Posted 11 March, 2010 Author Share Posted 11 March, 2010 What's your favourite alternative name for a trump? Air biscuit is defo right up there for me lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hamster Posted 11 March, 2010 Share Posted 11 March, 2010 What's your favourite alternative name for a trump? Air biscuit is defo right up there for me lol Love puffs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liquidshokk Posted 11 March, 2010 Author Share Posted 11 March, 2010 Once you make someone genuinely throw up from the smell of your guff it makes you feel like a real man. I made my missus throw up through the car window on the way home from a friends once after a pretty intense drink up the night before. Also taking a dump in someone elses hotel room toilet and stinking it out is one of my current favourites when away on a course/uni with the lads IMO sunday morning football farts/sh*ts are the worst. Be funny if they forgot to wind down the window. The smell of hangover sick and Stinking gut rot would be quite something... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liquidshokk Posted 11 March, 2010 Author Share Posted 11 March, 2010 Love puffs Big lol doubt your mother will appreciate one Sunday though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Boy Saint Posted 12 March, 2010 Share Posted 12 March, 2010 Botty Cough Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bristolsaint29 Posted 12 March, 2010 Share Posted 12 March, 2010 Windy pops Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arizona Posted 12 March, 2010 Share Posted 12 March, 2010 My missus released an air biscuit on a flight back from a works do in Tenerife recently. It woke up a sleeping colleague 2 seats away and 3 people had to stand up and move away. She got away with it by blaming someone else in another row - clever girl! Planes make you fart. No seriously, the drop in air pressure causes gasses in your intestine to expand, usually to the effect that they force their way out. It's know as gastrointestinal barotrauma. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liquidshokk Posted 12 March, 2010 Author Share Posted 12 March, 2010 Planes make you fart. No seriously, the drop in air pressure causes gasses in your intestine to expand, usually to the effect that they force their way out. It's know as gastrointestinal barotrauma. I expect it would be for the person sat next to you I dont eat planes anyway so I'm ok. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1976_Child Posted 13 March, 2010 Share Posted 13 March, 2010 what about fanny farts? when one 'withdraws' and you hear that really gross in-rush of air into the stinking abyss. ****ing puts me of heterosexual front end sex... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gigersaint Posted 13 March, 2010 Share Posted 13 March, 2010 What's your favourite alternative name for a trump? Air biscuit is defo right up there for me lol "Did you tread on a duck?" always makes me chuckle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LVSaint Posted 13 March, 2010 Share Posted 13 March, 2010 More tea vicar? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liquidshokk Posted 14 March, 2010 Author Share Posted 14 March, 2010 what about fanny farts? when one 'withdraws' and you hear that really gross in-rush of air into the stinking abyss. ****ing puts me of heterosexual front end sex... Lol. Gross......takes me back :-( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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