Valentines Day FAIL moments

[dubai_phil]

Just been out for the "romantic dinner". Nice Italian restaurant where we had our first date (good brownie points for remembering)

 

So it all goes to plan, the ladies get a red rose, some drinkable vino and for a change nice simple nosh in pleasant surroundings.

 

At a table near us is a mid 30's couple. They order a salad, I notice they seem to have less than perfectly chillaxed body language, but heck it's a night to focus on the GF....

 

Then I notice the air has turned frostier, the guy is asking them to hurry up with the main course......

 

The body language by now is so obvious even a blind man could see it hunched shoulders, arms crossed, looking everywhere except at each other....

 

The lady starts staring at her mobile as if willing it to ring, the guy's beeps as a txt is received, he looks at it and calls straight away to a waitress while putting the phone down on the table.....

 

Without closing the txt....

 

At which point the lady manages to read it upside down....

 

Leaps into the air and basically reads the text to the entire restaurant, It said.....

 

How long you going to stay with that ***** wife of yours? I'm here waiting for you with the bath filled and the candles.....

 

There were a few gurgling sounds and some very nifty ducking moves as plates were hurled as she marched out in tears.

 

Oh how we lol'd.

 

Anyone else spot anything tonight while people watching? Or did you only have eyes for ....

 

The size of the bill?

[Saint in Paradise]

Wasn't a certain JT ???? :D:D:D

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If his legal people read that it was only a joke

[dubai_phil]

Wasn't a certain JT ???? :D:D:D

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If his legal people read that it was only a joke

 

 

Hehehe - I wondered that as well but seeing as there was no PR expert orgainsing photographers I guess I took that as a big clue....

[tiki]

Just been out for the "romantic dinner". Nice Italian restaurant where we had our first date (good brownie points for remembering)

 

So it all goes to plan, the ladies get a red rose, some drinkable vino and for a change nice simple nosh in pleasant surroundings.

 

.....

 

One eaxch? Tightwad

[Whitey Grandad]

One eaxch? Tightwad

There are two types of men: those who give a single red rose, and those who give a whole bunch of them. Ask the ladies which they prefer.

[Jillyanne]

There are two types of men: those who give a single red rose, and those who give a whole bunch of them. Ask the ladies which they prefer.

 

Neither - red roses are tacky and such a cop out.

[Whitey Grandad]

Neither - red roses are tacky and such a cop out.

That confirms what I've always said - men are the romantic ones, women are much more practical. :smt055

[Wiltshire Saint]

I was out with Mrs Wiltshire Saint and in the restaurant there was a couple who were clearly young and in love. A woman was going round selling roses, like they do on the continent and when she got to the couple the woman said "no" and the bloke was all "Oh come on, you should have flowers!". She said that she was allergic to them, but the flower seller had seen a weakness in the shape of the man and pressed a bunch of flowers against the woman and gestured to the man for some cash. It turns out the young lady was allergic to flowers and she died, right there in the restaurant. It ruined the night for everyone because the man was crying and the ambulance came and we left before even discussing a dessert.

[69 saint]

I didn't buy any flowers or go out for a meal,just bought her a new bag and belt,

Hoover works a f ing treat now.

[RedAndWhite91]

I didn't buy any flowers or go out for a meal,just bought her a new bag and belt,

Hoover works a f ing treat now.

 

I copied a joke off of Viz Top Tips twitter feed and told it to her.

[bridge too far]

There are two types of men: those who give a single red rose, and those who give a whole bunch of them. Ask the ladies which they prefer.

 

I'd be appalled if Mr TF had bought ANY flowers at hugely inflated prices just one day a year.

 

He often buys me flowers - he doesn't need a commercialised, 'special' day to tell me he loves me.

[saintfully]

I was out with Mrs Wiltshire Saint and in the restaurant there was a couple who were clearly young and in love. A woman was going round selling roses, like they do on the continent and when she got to the couple the woman said "no" and the bloke was all "Oh come on, you should have flowers!". She said that she was allergic to them, but the flower seller had seen a weakness in the shape of the man and pressed a bunch of flowers against the woman and gestured to the man for some cash. It turns out the young lady was allergic to flowers and she died, right there in the restaurant. It ruined the night for everyone because the man was crying and the ambulance came and we left before even discussing a dessert.

 

 

A true and tragic story Wiltshire Saint, and if I'd known you were there I'd have said 'Hello'. As it is, I'm left organising the funeral - trying to make sure no-one brings flowers for the grave, thus wiping out the entire ex-GF's family.

 

Tomorrow I'm going out to get a new bird... with nice tits.

[slickmick]

If its true that women can do two things at once,

then why can't they have a headache and sex at the same time ?

 

I asked this over a romantic meal (even though the restaurant smelt of horses stuff) on Saturday. Guess thats another week I will have to wait.

[Channon's Sideburns]

If its true that women can do two things at once,

then why can't they have a headache and sex at the same time ?

 

I asked this over a romantic meal (even though the restaurant smelt of horses stuff) on Saturday. Guess thats another week I will have to wait.

 

Ah. But it is known that the endorphins from sex sort the headache out.

 

Tell her that next time. ;-)

[Jillyanne]

I'd be appalled if Mr TF had bought ANY flowers at hugely inflated prices just one day a year.

 

He often buys me flowers - he doesn't need a commercialised, 'special' day to tell me he loves me.

 

Exactly.

[Dimond Geezer]

I failed.

 

 

 

 

I booked a nice table for valentines day, it turns out Mrs Geezer can't play snooker

 

 

[Smirking_Saint]

I had a fool proof poem to get my end away for valentines day...

 

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I've got a knife so get in the f*cking van

[Mase]

I had a fool proof poem to get my end away for valentines day...

 

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I've got a knife so get in the f*cking van

 

Hahaha

[Durleyfos]

A true and tragic story Wiltshire Saint, and if I'd known you were there I'd have said 'Hello'. As it is, I'm left organising the funeral - trying to make sure no-one brings flowers for the grave, thus wiping out the entire ex-GF's family.

 

Tomorrow I'm going out to get a new bird... with nice tits.

 

Well, 'they' do say time is a great healer.

[SNSUN]

I hadn't bought my other half a Valentines card, so asked which one she'd like. Didn't go down too well, although I did buy her one of my own choosing eventually.

[aintforever]