Hamilton Saint Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 ... according to a survey of 3,000 people done by The Brooke. 1. at the end of the day 2. what goes around comes around 3. it's not rocket science 4. thinking outside the box 5. flogging a dead horse 6. don't shoot the messenger 7. going forward 8. by the close of play 9. give you the heads up 10. live and learn
SOTONS EAST SIDE Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 (edited) Poopey fans saying "WERE A BIG CLUB" lol Very annoying in my office! Edited 23 December, 2009 by SOTONS EAST SIDE
sotonjoe Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 "Let's send this one up the flagpole and see who salutes."
SOTONS EAST SIDE Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 How about some Oxymorons like! Poopey-Bigteam or Poopey-Billionaires or Poopey-Full PL stadium LMFAO
View From The Top Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Let's throw this one out there. Let's come at this from left field.
St Landrew Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Don't know about the office environment anymore, but phrases like... the boy done good, rather than the boy did well, really annoy. Everytime MOTD is on, Alan Shearer's vocabulary is laced with this stuff. Somebody at the Beeb should have a word with him. How are you..? I'm good..! You're not f****** good, you're f****** well..! :mad:
RedAndWhite91 Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 "Do you want overtime?" and "Why can't you do overtime?"
Draino76 Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 FYI cross the t's and dot the i's Belt and braces. four eyes check.
Whitey Grandad Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 ball-park figure ticks all the boxes :smt078
Deppo Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Please clear your desk and leave quietly. We don't want to involve security again, but we will if we have to.
saint_stevo Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Lets call a spade a spade here Just wanted to touch base (at which point i go mental and dig a compas in my eye)
bridge too far Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Don't know about the office environment anymore, but phrases like... the boy done good, rather than the boy did well, really annoy. Everytime MOTD is on, Alan Shearer's vocabulary is laced with this stuff. Somebody at the Beeb should have a word with him. How are you..? I'm good..! You're not f****** good, you're f****** well..! :mad: Not really an annoying OFFICE phrase - just a bloody annoying phrase: 'It'll be ready immediately' - 'Good, good'. One 'good' is enough IMO. I, too, shudder when I hear 'going forward', 'stakeholders' and 'having a conversation with' (why not plain old 'talking to' FFS)
Turkish Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 "Lets Park that for now" "its all smoke and mirrors" "you can only **** with your own ****" (quite like that one)
saintfully Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Gather in the low-hanging fruit. Climb the strategic staircase "Lets hit the cappucino machine and see if it comes out frothy" ...and my personal hate-phrase actually said to me once by a ****... "don't assume, it makes an ass out of u and me"... needless to say I punched him.
Junction 9 Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Trust, encouragement, reward, loyalty... satisfaction. That's what I'm... you know. Trust people and they'll be true to you. Treat them greatly, and they will show themselves to be great.
Guest Dark Sotonic Mills Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 there is no I in TEAM Reply: No, but there's a ME, c**t! And then hit them.
Redondo Saint Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 "Let's send this one up the flagpole and see who salutes." LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Let's kick some rocks and see what we find. Happy Holidays Do the math
Ponty Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 There's no 'I' in 'team'. But then there's no 'I' in 'useless smug colleague', either. And there's four in 'platitude-quoting idiot'. Go figure.
saint_stevo Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 a lack of planning on your part doesn't constitute an emergency on mine.....i want you to take the lead on this one and run with it.....
Johnny Bognor Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 (edited) ... according to a survey of 3,000 people done by The Brooke. 1. at the end of the day - I use this one 2. what goes around comes around - and this one 3. it's not rocket science - I've expanded this to "we're not trying to put men on the moon here" usually in response to IT people that just try and overcomplicate things to justify their salaries 4. thinking outside the box - and this one 5. flogging a dead horse - and this one 6. don't shoot the messenger - and this one 7. going forward - and this one 8. by the close of play - and this one 9. give you the heads up - and this one 10. live and learn - not this one though Which must officially make me the most annoying **** in the office. Oh well, another day another dollar How are you..? I'm good..! You're not f****** good, you're f****** well..! :mad: I use that all the time. Too many people say "not bad" (which sounds crap lets face it) whereas "good" is more positive and essentially means the same. I'll stop using good, if you stop using not bad. THen of course there are the 6 P's = Perfect Planning Prevents **** Poor Performance Edited 23 December, 2009 by Johnny Bognor
EastleighSoulBoy Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 there is no I in TEAM To which the riposte is usually 'But there's a me in it' Keep me in the loop is another I find boring and I get annoyed to find myself using it.
gonzo Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 there is no I in TEAM There is no I in team. But there is a 'me' if you look hard enough! EDIT: Somebody's already posted that! lol
Kadeem Hardison Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 "Just stick your finger up his anus if you can't firm him up with your hands."
INFLUENCED.COM Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Don't waste time blameing spend time resolving Do it once and do it right F uk me its not like we are trying to reinvent the wheel
Johnny Bognor Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Don't bring me problems, bring me solutions
View From The Top Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 THen of course there are the 6 P's = Perfect Planning Prevents **** Poor Performance I use that, too often prehaps. That and "use the KISS principle".
Redondo Saint Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 strategic logistics functionality - stupid IT bull****
Thedelldays Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 I use that, too often prehaps. That and "use the KISS principle". very apt..
RedAndWhite91 Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Wow, I can't wait to work in an office when I'm older..
mynameisthehulk Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Anything with the word customer in it Putting the customer first World class customer service Customer focused Customers can all suck my ****ing ****
Micky Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 "Feedback". I ****in' hate the term "feedback". What does it mean? I'm going to expain how I wanted it done. I'm going to complain nicely. I'm going to comment on your work. I'm going to give you some advice. What the **** is "feedback"? The military do it right - "listen in guys" - I'm gonna tell you how it is "bollocking", you ****ed it up, "nice job", you did it right "Feedback" - People pussyfooting around, too scared to get to the point and say what they really think - cak...!
Huffton Posted 23 December, 2009 Posted 23 December, 2009 Reply: No, but there's a ME, c**t! And then hit them. I thought the reply was: no, but there is a U in c u nt
norwaysaint Posted 24 December, 2009 Posted 24 December, 2009 "We really smashed it!" "We totally killed it!" ...when referring to just doing a good job. When maiming or slaughtering, for example, a Bengal Cat, these would be appropriate.
Atticus Finch of Maycomb Posted 24 December, 2009 Posted 24 December, 2009 "the disciplinary hearing will take place on the 10th of December and the outcome may result in dismissal"
revolution saint Posted 24 December, 2009 Posted 24 December, 2009 Referring to your organisation as 'The business' when working in the public sector. It's not a business, it's not run for profit and it's not there to extract the most money it can from it's "customers". It's a service. However, anyone who wants to do well in the public sector should always use 'The business' in as many conversations as possible - it virtually guarantees success.
saint_stevo Posted 24 December, 2009 Posted 24 December, 2009 Can you write a business case for that suggestion? Is that viable? Can i have a new apprentice please, i have split mine....
Marsdinho Posted 24 December, 2009 Posted 24 December, 2009 "Marsdinho, you know the court order states that you are not allowed within 100ft of my desk"
Merovingian Posted 24 December, 2009 Posted 24 December, 2009 "its all about capturing hearts and minds" "thought shower"
Draino76 Posted 24 December, 2009 Posted 24 December, 2009 Wow, I can't wait to work in an office when I'm older.. Excactly. Don't ****ing do it. Go and be an aeroplane engineer or summat.
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