my stag do

[Saint Martini]

Fookin hate Copenhagen.

 

Caught a bloke walking out of the hotel I was in with my laptop he had just smashed my hotel room door to nick.

 

Then some while he was being nicked, some **** came up behind me with a knife, slashed the strap on my Cannon camera and ran off with it in front of the cops.

 

bstds

 

I like Copenhagen, just a tad expensive.

[dubai_phil]

Im sure i have heard this story from about 25 different people.

 

blast

 

I'd been looking for months toi get my Danishism out in the open, we'd had a thread with people being swissist and thought it was time...

 

Interesting concpet though, as the bloke concerned who tells the story was the stag, and explained in a lot of detail what happened to the extremely ex best man after he had been taken to court and made bankrupt for all the damages......

[dubai_phil]

I like Copenhagen, just a tad expensive.

 

sure, just don't take luggage or cameras.

 

Not an easy place to find anything to eat though, a nation that thinks "The Hereford Beouf Stew" (sic) is their best restaurant should be avoided

[CabbageFace]

blast

 

I'd been looking for months toi get my Danishism out in the open, we'd had a thread with people being swissist and thought it was time...

 

Interesting concpet though, as the bloke concerned who tells the story was the stag, and explained in a lot of detail what happened to the extremely ex best man after he had been taken to court and made bankrupt for all the damages......

 

We its amazing he was that wasted he got chucked on train to a random country but yet can still remember enough to take him to court.....

[Rory]

"If I can't have you, I don't want nobody baby, if I can't have you, whoa-oh."

 

Good choice of first dance song, saintkiptanui.

[saintkiptanui]

"If I can't have you, I don't want nobody baby, if I can't have you, whoa-oh."

 

Good choice of first dance song, saintkiptanui.

Tony debart the real thing, I think I will find a CD with that on and I can dance on the rocks like Tony.

[saintkiptanui]

I agree with Scudamore about people doing really bad things to the groom, surely the point is for the loads of friends to have a good laugh before it becomes difficult to all get together again, cucumber up bum is rediculous as is the train to milan, if I have to do whta hatch had to do although most embarrrassing I will be delighted to get away with just that and make it home safely next friday.

 

If i'm not online by next saturday please call an ambulance.

[scott_saints]

I

If i'm not online by next saturday please call an ambulance.

scott_saints: *Rings the ambulance*.....

Ambulance: Hello

scott_saints: Saintkiptanui needs an ambulance

Ambulance: Ok, why does he need an ambulance and where is he?

scott_saints: I don't know why he needs an ambulance but he's missing

Ambulance: And where is he?

scott_saints: Dunno. Not on t'interweb though

Ambulance: Ermmm ok

scott_saints: Hurry up.... he might have a cucumber up his bum ffs!!!

Ambulance: Weirdo. Bye.

[saintkiptanui]

I will be in St ives. That will help.

[Scudamore]

scott_saints: *Rings the ambulance*.....

Ambulance: Hello

scott_saints: Saintkiptanui needs an ambulance

Ambulance: Ok, why does he need an ambulance and where is he?

scott_saints: I don't know why he needs an ambulance but he's missing

Ambulance: And where is he?

scott_saints: Dunno. Not on t'interweb though

Ambulance: Ermmm ok

scott_saints: Hurry up.... he might have a cucumber up his bum ffs!!!

Ambulance: Weirdo. Bye.

 

Much more likely scenario is you knocking on the doors of St Ives trying to find him...in order to eat that cucumber non?

[scott_saints]

Much more likely scenario is you knocking on the doors of St Ives trying to find him...in order to eat that cucumber non?

No. I would not like to eat the cucumber. I would merely replace it.

[Hatch]

scott_saints: *Rings the ambulance*.....

Ambulance: Hello

scott_saints: Saintkiptanui needs an ambulance

Ambulance: Ok, why does he need an ambulance and where is he?

scott_saints: I don't know why he needs an ambulance but he's missing

Ambulance: And where is he?

scott_saints: Dunno. Not on t'interweb though

Ambulance: Ermmm ok

scott_saints: Hurry up.... he might have a cucumber up his bum ffs!!!

Ambulance: Weirdo. Bye.

 

I like that. It made me laugh. Well Done.

[scott_saints]

I like that. It made me laugh. Well Done.

f**k off.

[Jillyanne]

Kip - how old are you, if under 30 you are too young to get married imho.

[saintkiptanui]

Kip - how old are you, if under 30 you are too young to get married imho.

32 and yes I was born in September 1975 which is when you were born, what do you want a paper f*ckin hat?

[Jillyanne]

32 and yes I was born in September 1975 which is when you were born, what do you want a paper f*ckin hat?

 

No it wasn't.

[Crouchie's Lawyer]

Kip - how old are you, if under 30 you are too young to get married imho.

 

Erm, im getting married next Sept. Ill be 26 going on 27. I do not think I am too young. I would like kids before im 28 as would not like to be generations ahead of my kids. These people who dont have kids until mid to late thirties are sick I tell ya

[Jillyanne]

Erm, im getting married next Sept. Ill be 26 going on 27. I do not think I am too young. I would like kids before im 28 as would not like to be generations ahead of my kids. These people who dont have kids until mid to late thirties are sick I tell ya

 

Each to their own INS - just an opinion. Good luck to you.

[scott_saints]

26 is too young to be getting married. This is my opinion, but it happens to be correct.

[Crouchie's Lawyer]

26 is too young to be getting married. This is my opinion, but it happens to be correct.

 

Meh I have had my share of fun and when self assessing I believe I can be quite a difficult person to live with. Ergo if my current Mrs puts up with me she must love me long time and I have been with her for nearly 6 years.

 

Plus I want to spawn critters within the next two years so makes sense.

[CabbageFace]

Kip - how old are you, if under 30 you are too young to get married imho.

 

Lol.

[Hatch]

rule 1s all over this thread

[scott_saints]

Meh I have had my share of fun and when self assessing I believe I can be quite a difficult person to live with. Ergo if my current Mrs puts up with me she must love me long time and I have been with her for nearly 6 years.

 

Plus I want to spawn critters within the next two years so makes sense.

Been with her for 6 yeas and your 26??

 

So. if my maths is correct then you have only had 2 "proper" years of being able to get p1ssed up with the lads etc?!

 

She better be worth it otherwise you'll be kicking yourself when she cheats on you because of the credit crunch

[Crouchie's Lawyer]

rule 1s all over this thread

 

Just checking my understanding of the definition of rule one...

 

Its 'picture evidence required' right?

[scott_saints]

Just checking my understanding of the definition of rule one...

 

Its 'picture evidence required' right?

Yep. So post the picture of your wife to be so I can find her profile on www.illicitencounters.com in a few years.

 

Cheers

[Crouchie's Lawyer]

Been with her for 6 yeas and your 26??

 

So. if my maths is correct then you have only had 2 "proper" years of being able to get p1ssed up with the lads etc?!

 

She better be worth it otherwise you'll be kicking yourself when she cheats on you because of the credit crunch

 

Well technically its 5.5 years I have been with her and im 25.75 years old. I was going out drinking when I was 17 so more like 3.25 years of legal drinking. She has no qualms with me holidaying with the lads or going out on town either still so I havent missed out on anything. And, we did have a small break where I had some extra curricular fun about 4 years ago.

[Crouchie's Lawyer]

Yep. So post the picture of your wife to be so I can find her profile on www.illicitencounters.com in a few years.

 

Cheers

 

She loves my weiner too much to have an illicit encounter. And as much as I would love to post a piccie of my Mrs, I know this is TMS so think ill give it a miss!

[Hatch]

Just checking my understanding of the definition of rule one...

 

Its 'picture evidence required' right?

 

 

if you mention wife or girlfriend , you must post a picture of said lady.

[Scudamore]

if you mention wife or girlfriend , you must post a picture of said lady.

 

What about mother in laws?

 

Mother in law lives in Rotherham, and for that reason. I'm out.

[Crouchie's Lawyer]

What about mother in laws?

 

Cant spell it so I will use phonics. Im sure you need to know how to make all the little dots appear above each letter to spell it right and I do not know how to do this.

 

too-shey

[Scudamore]

Cant spell it so I will use phonics. Im sure you need to know how to make all the little dots appear above each letter to spell it right and I do not know how to do this.

 

too-shey

 

Touché. Although i accept touche.

[Hatch]

What about mother in laws?

 

 

I've only got a topless one of her and thats on my phone and I don't have the know how to copy it over.

[Crouchie's Lawyer]

I've only got a topless one of her and thats on my phone and I don't have the know how to copy it over.

 

Its called SMS - text it, we can do the rest

[TheCholulaKid]

marriage ain't gonna change a thing, I don't get blow jobs anymore so that doesn't matter and the backdoor was closed a week after the engagemnet ring went on her finger.

 

You don't get blow jobs anymore? And you're not even married yet. Jesus, mate, I feel sorry for you. Will all end in tears. There's only so long a man can go without one.

[Thedelldays]

Kip. am I invited.....?

[saintkiptanui]

Every stag do needs a mincer.

 

Above poster I really don't care for the job of blow, I find them selfish and slightly dull8-[

[dubai_phil]

Every stag do needs a mincer.

 

Above poster I really don't care for the job of blow, I find them selfish and slightly dull8-[

 

THIS MAN MUST BE BANNED FROM ALL INTERNET ACCESS NOW!

 

Mods - how can we allow a poster to spread such nasty solicious LIES?

 

WOMEN MIGHT FIND OUT!

 

Good grief man, get a hold of yourself

 

oh

[Weston Super Saint]

touché. Although i accept touche.

 

ffs

[Ponty]

ffs

 

He also pluralised "Mother in law" to "Mother in laws", rather than the more accurate "Mothers in law".

 

Tsk.

[OldNick]

26 is too young to be getting married. This is my opinion, but it happens to be correct.

i married at 23 and have lasted 25 years and had a good time.

[OldNick]

THIS MAN MUST BE BANNED FROM ALL INTERNET ACCESS NOW!

 

Mods - how can we allow a poster to spread such nasty solicious LIES?

 

WOMEN MIGHT FIND OUT!

 

Good grief man, get a hold of yourself

 

oh

That is a disaster waiting to happen, Saintkip must be in a trance.

[Scudamore]

ffs

 

He also pluralised "Mother in law" to "Mother in laws", rather than the more accurate "Mothers in law".

 

Tsk.

 

Steady on...I don't claim to be Mr Grammar. He was unsure on how to spell touché. I've told him...

 

Oh and you changed my capital t on the first touché WSS ffs...

 

Pedants...can't live with them...carnt live witout em...

[Kadeem Hardison]

Kip, if you die this weekend can I have your full membership on here please?

[saintkiptanui]

Kip, if you die this weekend can I have your full membership on here please?

If you congratulate me on my winnings and you will have to do spazzer saturday night posts.

[Kadeem Hardison]

Congratulations on winning lots of money. I couldn't wish it on a better person. That makes 3 of you who have made a success out of your lives after being rescued from that orphanage. God bless you and god bless the Cheeky Girls. At least you didn't have to suckle on Lembit Opik's winkle.