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Having an affair...


saint lard

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Well.this is a bugger.

 

I have been carrying on with a rather scrumptious woman...

 

Thing is, she is seeing a fella ,they had been together only a couple of months and she has became quite concerned that i would think badly of her as she was seeing someone,many a tear shed on her part.

I think i am possibly being taken for a ride,but that could be the pessimist inside me, but she has shown definate signs,and i mean definate,that she is quite taken by me...the boyfriend has just returned from being away,she says she will tell him,i'm not so sure she will but bloody women can be game players and cagey....do i just forget the whole mullarky or do i stick with it and see what happens....she has bought me lovely presents and been very willing to meet my son....is she a brazen hussey or sincere.....advice needed.

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use her...get her to dump the other fella...then when she does and you know she has...just erase her completely from your life..dont answer the phone to her, ignore her when you see her..even when she tries to talk to you, just pretend you have no idea who she is...

 

farking cheating slut

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use her...get her to dump the other fella...then when she does and you know she has...just erase her completely from your life..dont answer the phone to her, ignore her when you see her..even when she tries to talk to you, just pretend you have no idea who she is...

 

farking cheating slut

 

Bitter and twisted?

But i like your logic.

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You forgot to add your own motivations in the OP

 

Do you expect to marry her and have 2.4 brats?

 

Or are you in need of some quality entertainment as you move towards spiritual fulfillment

 

If the former then start stalking your local supermarket and explain the meaning all the Polish/Russian labels to confused looking chicks. The latter? why you on here asking instead of doing?

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nah mate...

 

being in the Navy you get very street wise to the antics of women and they are equally as bad as what men can be...

 

you could NEVER fully trust her though could you, be honest...

 

Your not him are you?

He's a submariner.

 

Oh shi......

 

Your right,however,i could never really trust her not to do the same again.

She was very upset when i put this too her.Tears all over the manor.

Edited by saint lard
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Ah... i think the penny has dropped.

 

I am way too gullible perhaps,or just a little too trustworthy.

 

It's a feckin' minefield this relationship mullarky.

you are not gullible as long as you take it for what it is...fun

 

if you start to feel attached in anyway what so ever..time to do the good thing and thin her out...

 

you simply cannot trust her if she decided she wanted to be with you..no matter how much you try to tell yourself you can..

 

dont fall for those tears mate..just think of all the way a bloke would try to exploit a situation if he was in something similar, women like her are doing just this...she is a snake with tits..

 

:twisted:

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give her a week to do it

 

Are you mad!!!?? :confused:

 

F u c k i n g hell if you give the slag a week she willl have ****ed him more times than a Gosprot Hooker just to check "she is making the right choice!"

 

Dont bugger around ask her straight " Me or Gay boy!?" if its the latter than tough s hit. Glad I can help.

 

M Tickle

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Are you mad!!!?? :confused:

 

F u c k i n g hell if you give the slag a week she willl have ****ed him more times than a Gosprot Hooker just to check "she is making the right choice!"

 

Dont bugger around ask her straight " Me or Gay boy!?" if its the latter than tough s hit. Glad I can help.

 

M Tickle

 

i agree lol

 

the only reason id say stick with her is if she really is special and the only reason she did it all is cos its a special relationship. if not dog her and dump her

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Funny when a bloke does it his mates thinks he's a hero but when a woman does she is a slag?

 

My advice would be woman look for fun because they are bored at home but they love the security of a breadowner, house and her own children around her.

 

Problem is you will enjoy the fun so much yourself and you can't help but follow your heart by continuing it.

It all ends in tears and the woman will go back to her boring life before you as you move on with yours.

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TBH, if she is ready to cheat on her fella then she could be bad news, but then after only a couple of months then it clearly ain't working.

 

Have your fun and get out, for me she clearly ain't making the right noises to want to split up, think she is just one of them women.

 

If you wanna give it a go then, say you are not prepared to play games, as you could realistically get your face pasted, i for one would certainly beat you till next tuesday if i ever found my missus cheating. However though, women don't want men that come on a plate, they are far more up for a challenge, hold your cards close to your chest and then back off a bit, she will be far more appealed to a man she believes she has 'won' over.

 

If you can't be arsed though, leave her with an ass like a broken cat flap

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I think i have played it fairly wisely so far,i have to put my little boy top of the agenda,he is aware she is my friend but nothing more as yet.

She,to give her some credit, has been nothing more than excellent when with my son.

I will take a step back and see what transpires.

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Well.this is a bugger.

 

I have been carrying on with a rather scrumptious woman...

 

Thing is, she is seeing a fella ,they had been together only a couple of months and she has became quite concerned that i would think badly of her as she was seeing someone,many a tear shed on her part.

I think i am possibly being taken for a ride,but that could be the pessimist inside me, but she has shown definate signs,and i mean definate,that she is quite taken by me...the boyfriend has just returned from being away,she says she will tell him,i'm not so sure she will but bloody women can be game players and cagey....do i just forget the whole mullarky or do i stick with it and see what happens....she has bought me lovely presents and been very willing to meet my son....is she a brazen hussey or sincere.....advice needed.

yes, that IS the pessimist inside you.....she doesn't sound like a 'good time girl' to me at all........good time girls would NOT be interested in meeting your son, trust me!...

all you blokes on here crack me up.....you're all blase about feelings etc, like youve never given a sh1t about a woman in your whole life.....laughable...!!

SL ,sometimes situations happen that we have little or no control over, just go with it and listen to your instincts (not your insecurities) .

Saint Lard, from what i remember of your posts re: your ex/little boy etc, it seems to me like you're due some happiness...grab it with both hands and if it doesn't work out then at least you can say you gave it a shot.

my advice would be to give her a month to make her choice,to tell her B/F and get him out of her life. if she doesn't choose to be with you, then so be it.

it's tough (believe me , i know!) but you will still live and still breath.

best of luck.

x

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yes, that IS the pessimist inside you.....she doesn't sound like a 'good time girl' to me at all........good time girls would NOT be interested in meeting your son, trust me!...

all you blokes on here crack me up.....you're all blase about feelings etc, like youve never given a sh1t about a woman in your whole life.....laughable...!!

SL ,sometimes situations happen that we have little or no control over, just go with it and listen to your instincts (not your insecurities) .

Saint Lard, from what i remember of your posts re: your ex/little boy etc, it seems to me like you're due some happiness...grab it with both hands and if it doesn't work out then at least you can say you gave it a shot.

my advice would be to give her a month to make her choice,to tell her B/F and get him out of her life. if she doesn't choose to be with you, then so be it.

it's tough (believe me , i know!) but you will still live and still breath.

best of luck.

x

 

Always good to get a womans perspective,thankyou.

She is superb with my son,always willing to involve him and join in with him,which did really take me aback.

Yeah past year or so was total carp,hassle from the ex and wranglings with her ref the little man,who know what is round the corner.

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SL, clearly many on here empathise with your situation, and the majority seem to recomend ending it but you can't make this decision based on the facts as we are.

 

I have a question for you to ponder and (imho) you need to tell her the answer to her face and wait for her response. Only then can you realistically make another move. If you carry on as you are, there WILL be tears, but there will always be tears in life so not necessarily a bad thing is it.

 

Question - DO YOU LOVE HER?

 

 

hamster

PS

I hope you are using condoms

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jesus..some wet cases on here..

 

she is a cheat, pure and simple..dont kid yourself that it would be different with you as it wont..

 

Jes! Dulldays you relay are a sad ****. So if some jock has a few birds hes a Stud!,,,,,If a girl has a few helmets shes a mattress cover and cant be trusted LOL. I know what it is, Your an ugly knut who's crap in the sack, Who's Janner Bird had her eyes turned by a bigger ogge!:smt047

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Jes! Dulldays you relay are a sad ****. So if some jock has a few birds hes a Stud!,,,,,If a girl has a few helmets shes a mattress cover and cant be trusted LOL. I know what it is, Your an ugly knut who's crap in the sack, Who's Janner Bird had her eyes turned by a bigger ogge!:smt047

 

 

where have I said that..?

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where have I said that..?

i think that what he is implying is that you're coming across as being judge,jury and executioner on this woman, and banding ALL woman who have affairs as slags...... which simply isnt the case......

emotions can be very difficult things to deal with sometimes.....

i was in a relationship for 16years, husband/kids /house etc, then he left me for another woman, so now i'm left walking the minefield that is singledom, and believe me , it IS a minefield!...but i refuse to believe that there aren't good people out there, ..... whether they be IN relationships or not.......

like i said before, sometimes you've just gotta try and grab happiness when you can, life is too short to miss opportunities when they present themselves...

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You clearly like her a lot.

 

I think the question to ask yourself is

 

"if she liked you as much as you clearly like her would she be hesitating and needing to be given an ultimatum in the first place or would she have already dumped the other chap?"

 

From what you've posted on here I think the answer is probably pretty obvious.

 

Therefore follow TDD's plan.

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You clearly like her a lot.

 

I think the question to ask yourself is

 

"if she liked you as much as you clearly like her would she be hesitating and needing to be given an ultimatum in the first place or would she have already dumped the other chap?"

 

From what you've posted on here I think the answer is probably pretty obvious.

 

Therefore follow TDD's plan.

 

If i didn't think something of her i would've not entertained the idea of her getting "close" to my little boy.

 

She freely stated she would tell her fella,she required no to persuading to do so.He has just returned from being away,i will see what transpires in the coming days.

If it becomes clear that she does need persuading or starts delaying telling him what has been going on then i will have all the answers i need.

I must stress we were nothing more than friends for a considerable time,and throughout she said she has never done this before,her relationship with the other bloke was/is still in its early stages.

 

I feel just as bad for entertaining this whole thing,as i would not like it done to myself.

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If i didn't think something of her i would've not entertained the idea of her getting "close" to my little boy.

 

She freely stated she would tell her fella,she required no to persuading to do so.He has just returned from being away,i will see what transpires in the coming days.

If it becomes clear that she does need persuading or starts delaying telling him what has been going on then i will have all the answers i need.

I must stress we were nothing more than friends for a considerable time,and throughout she said she has never done this before,her relationship with the other bloke was/is still in its early stages.

 

I feel just as bad for entertaining this whole thing,as i would not like it done to myself.

 

i have been on both sides of the affair situation, and tbh, i dont think most people think that they would EVER do it to someone ,as they would not like it done to them, but sometimes you just meet someone who makes the risk worthwhile, and if anything it has made me more sympathetic to the 'girl' who had a n affair with my husband..i understand that people do not deliberately set out to hurt others,but that sometimes the attraction to someone is just too great...sometimes you have to let ya heart rule your head.....

God, i'm a soppy old mare ,aren't i !! LOL:smt081

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If i didn't think something of her i would've not entertained the idea of her getting "close" to my little boy.

 

She freely stated she would tell her fella,she required no to persuading to do so.He has just returned from being away,i will see what transpires in the coming days.

If it becomes clear that she does need persuading or starts delaying telling him what has been going on then i will have all the answers i need.

I must stress we were nothing more than friends for a considerable time,and throughout she said she has never done this before,her relationship with the other bloke was/is still in its early stages.

 

I feel just as bad for entertaining this whole thing,as i would not like it done to myself.

 

Exactly.

 

Good luck!:cool:

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i think that what he is implying is that you're coming across as being judge,jury and executioner on this woman, and banding ALL woman who have affairs as slags...... which simply isnt the case......

emotions can be very difficult things to deal with sometimes.....

i was in a relationship for 16years, husband/kids /house etc, then he left me for another woman, so now i'm left walking the minefield that is singledom, and believe me , it IS a minefield!...but i refuse to believe that there aren't good people out there, ..... whether they be IN relationships or not.......

like i said before, sometimes you've just gotta try and grab happiness when you can, life is too short to miss opportunities when they present themselves...

 

If it all falls through expect a PM ;)

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