Ash Posted 4 October, 2009 Share Posted 4 October, 2009 Gordan Brown went up to a prostitute and said "I'm Prime Minster of England, how much will it cost me to spend the night with you ?" she replied "Mr Prime Minister, if you can get my skirt as high as my taxes my pants as low as my wages, your penis as hard as the times we are living in and keep it rising like the price of fuel and screw me like you have the pensioners, it won't cost you a penny !" She'll never make a decent living. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jillyanne Posted 4 October, 2009 Share Posted 4 October, 2009 I had a text joke today about a guy in Sainsbury's being caught 'doing something', think I may get infracted if I post it though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ponty Posted 4 October, 2009 Share Posted 4 October, 2009 Post it then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jillyanne Posted 4 October, 2009 Share Posted 4 October, 2009 Post it then. Oh - are we back to our 'hate' thing now then? You do seem to be picking on me tonight - bored??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hamster Posted 4 October, 2009 Share Posted 4 October, 2009 I had a text joke today about a guy in Sainsbury's being caught 'doing something', think I may get infracted if I post it though. Jilly, is it the one about a letter to his wife? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hamster Posted 4 October, 2009 Share Posted 4 October, 2009 True story: A gay friend of mine had left his wife to move in with his boyfriend. A week or too later they were out shopping and discussing what to have for their dinner. They had not noticed the ex stood right next to them, until he felt an almighty thud as she hit him with a frozen chicken. "have a ****ing chicken" she screamed as she did it. This is true, hamster's honour, it happened in the CO-OP Sittingbourne, Kent about 21 years ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jillyanne Posted 4 October, 2009 Share Posted 4 October, 2009 Jilly, is it the one about a letter to his wife? Nope. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jillyanne Posted 4 October, 2009 Share Posted 4 October, 2009 True story: A gay friend of mine had left his wife to move in with his boyfriend. A week or too later they were out shopping and discussing what to have for their dinner. They had not noticed the ex stood right next to them, until he felt an almighty thud as she hit him with a frozen chicken. "have a ****ing chicken" she screamed as she did it. This is true, hamster's honour, it happened in the CO-OP Sittingbourne, Kent about 21 years ago. Ok Face Book style - 'Jill doesn't get this'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saint_Jonny Posted 4 October, 2009 Share Posted 4 October, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saint_Jonny Posted 4 October, 2009 Share Posted 4 October, 2009 People have to watch the vid I just posted, its hilarious, almost think it deserves its own thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marsdinho Posted 5 October, 2009 Share Posted 5 October, 2009 What do you call a Spanish pervert...??? Senor Boobs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dog Posted 5 October, 2009 Share Posted 5 October, 2009 A hillbilly farmer who wanted to get a divorce paid a visit to a lawyer. The lawyer said, 'How can I help you?' The farmer said, 'I want to get one of them dayvorces.' The lawyer said, 'Do you have any grounds?' The farmer said, 'Yes, I got 40 acres' The lawyer said, 'No, No, you don't understand, Do you have a suit? The farmer said, 'Yes, I got a suit, I wears it to church on Sundays.' The lawyer said, 'No, no, I mean, do you have a case?' The farmer said, 'No, I ain't got a Case, but I got a John Deere. The lawyer said, 'No, I mean, do you have a grudge?' The farmer said,'Yes, I got a grudge, that's where I parks the John Deere' The lawyer said, 'Does your wife beat you up or something?' The farmer said, 'No, we both get up at 4:30.' By now the lawyer is getting frustrated but tries one last question ..The lawyer said, 'Is your wife a nagger?' The farmer said, 'No, she's a little white gal, but our last child was a nagger and that's why I wants a dayvorce.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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