Jump to content

Message from Tony Lynam - 26th June, 02:53 PM (draft)


Guided Missile
 Share

Recommended Posts

Dear Fans,

 

I would just like to break off momentarily from the important and in depth meeting I am attending, in order to update you and the staff at St. Marys Stadium, on the latest position reached regarding the ongoing negotiations with the Football League. Myself and the principle behind the deal, Michael Fialka, have been sat beside his parents fax machine and have to say that apart from two excellent offers on mobile phones and one tempting leasing deal for a new Renault Kangoo, there has been no contact from Dr. Malwhinney. We would like to work closely with the League, but it is apparent that they, in their wisdom, have declined to allow us to reserve the right to sue their arses in court, thus incurring unspecified legal fees on their behalf, should our deal to buy Southampton Football Club go ahead. To say that we are deeply upset by this development is an understatement and we are reserving our position.

 

A new and unforeseen legal issue has suddenly occured, which has now meant that we may, regretfully, have to delay our purchase still further. The Daily Echo has published several totally unfounded and untrue stories regarding the background of the man who is the source of the funding, that well known and incredibly rich, former professional footballer, Michael Fialka. Until such time as the Echo retracts these baseless allegations, his mother has said that he is not allowed to pay the wage bill of the club and how could a newspaper treat a nice Jewish boy so badly? I will be taking legal advice on the possibility of a libel action.

 

I am sure you will agree that it is vital for the club to protect it's future owner from such attacks and understand that the reasons we are doing this is in the best long term interests of Southampton Football Club.

 

I hope you will be able to continue to support our bid and the attack we are proposing against the freedom of the press, (apart from Soccer Saturday, obviously)

 

Best Wishes for a good weekend and remember to spend time with your family and if you can, give something to charity. I know I do...

 

Tony Lynam

Link to comment
Share on other sites

that's 30 seconds of my life that I'm never getting back...

 

Which I will add the the last 6 months on here looking for a spark of gold amongst all the crap.

 

Why, is it that when the spark of gold is glimpsed it turns out to be nothing more than the wrapper off a caramac

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why dont you just **** off you stupid ****

 

I have to ask you Ed, do you type in the asterisks or do you actually type the rude words knowing they will become asterisks anyway? Also, you really ought to brush up on your grammar and spelling as these are skills which will serve you well in all walks of life (except perhaps in a call centre) - "dont" isn't a word unless you are holidaying in St Tropez this summer, and sentences should always be terminated correctly. I would recommend the use of a single question mark in this instance.

 

I wonder if TL will "chuckle" over this one like he did with the tyre kicker picture?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have to ask you Ed, do you type in the asterisks or do you actually type the rude words knowing they will become asterisks anyway? Also, you really ought to brush up on your grammar and spelling as these are skills which will serve you well in all walks of life (except perhaps in a call centre) - "dont" isn't a word unless you are holidaying in St Tropez this summer, and sentences should always be terminated correctly. I would recommend the use of a single question mark in this instance.

 

I wonder if TL will "chuckle" over this one like he did with the tyre kicker picture?

 

Here all week

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Great satire, perhaps GM the next time you post a piece of comedy genius to lighten the moment you could question why our prospective Football chairman is seen working hard on his laptop. Trouble is when the camera pans round he seems to be looking at baby photos? Due diligence perhaps? I would have expected numbers that don't end in lbs and ozs.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Im pretty sure everyone on here knows all about GM and who he is.

 

Pancake for me that's a no and no, can you please enlighten me but only with GM's blessing. He is by far one of the most interesting posters and his views usually well founded. Don't understand why the man is hated so much as he seems to display the exact credentials needed in our future chairman.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...