rallyboy

Lineker doesn't understand the situation, he's a bit dim. 'the poor club has just got it's finances wrong, it's not fair to penalise them...' No crispboy, they have been recruiting players illegally, trading insolvently and gaining a playing advantge by outbidding other teams with money they owed to local businesses and the taxman, they also misled the Prem league into allowing them to bring in O'Hara and the bloke with the stupid name who beat us at St Marys. They've been cheating, they still are, and the points penalties should stack up when the books are examined. And as for the fantastic support - was that 15-20 faithful travellers I saw celebrating on motd? Storrie's nephew filling his boots? Their kitman on more than our manager was last season? Plenty more laughs to come!

Expert opinion is that the sign of a club in big trouble is when they borrow against future revenue. Pompey administrator's no.1 survival plan? - spend all future revenue on past debt....this comedy is far from over. The only good news for Storrie is that the offshore taxhaven of Hayling doesn't have an extradition treaty with the UK should the authorities find anything unusual in the books. Once he crosses Langstone Bridge he'll be like Ronnie Biggs, the yard will have to go and kidnap him on a daytrip.

some people have been saying how they have sympathy with the few and on reflection I feel quite bad about what's happened to them today. Oh, I've got over it! Can we try for a top ten of Skate myths to see us through until the administrator calls the police? Rumours regularly paraded as facts - 1. The imaginary dock strike, that no one can quite put a date on. 2. The shirt under the St Marys pitch - urban myth spread at every new ground. 3. Best fans in the world - mmm. 4. A Southampton owner being part of a war before he was born. 5. 'We laid down at West Brom and relegated the scummers' - er no, your players were awful or took backhanders as is the way at Fratton and relegated Palace. Ironically many of those same players bled your club dry and led to where you are today. Anymore anti-Saints dodgy 'facts' out there? And on a boring note I see that the administrator accepts arms dealer's debt as valid and genuine, thus dispelling the theory that they could ignore their major problem.

I just lost 75mins of my life catching up on today's posts, and that was skipping through the more odd ones, or people posting links to news we had discussed 24 hours earlier! Overturn the 9pts? Non-starter, it's there in black and white. Checking potential owners for funds? Wow, what a great idea, this man is obviously a sharp operator..... Storrie to resign?...look again, he said he would tender it, 'according to his contract'... is that with a 12month notice or payoff perhaps? He stays put for the mo with his wage guaranteed as a football debt and then has a huge payoff while ironically taxpayers have to fund his prison time. I don't see that much has changed today other than a few office staff are going to get shat on and the administrator now has the chance to dig through all the dirt. They are still in a very big hole, depending on what he finds, the hole could yet get cavernous. Where is the buyer with £30M to burn?

I think they're a bit miffed that we have been telling them for at least six months that the house of cards was going to fall down and they wouldn't accept it. I'll leave it to Phil to add, 'I don't like to say I told you so but....' I love the - 'local club for local people'! Anyway, I've got to go out and do work so I look forward to an hour and a half of thread catch up later....as I guess that this is the day that Pompey are relegated from the top tier. Sometime soon we shall pass like ships in the night - one executive liner and a holed pedalo.

what do you call a good season? Any one in which your local rivals get relegated in February! A few of us has guessed at March but it's earlier than most expected. And after six months waiting I have finally seen the precisely-worded headline I've been hoping for, and fittingly it's the News that has delivered - 'Pompey on the brink'......mmmm, nice. This is a golden era.

'open air leisure' is the precise term - so that petting zoo could be a goer. I also see no reason to retain Storrie unless he pops straight back into the office as a potential buyer. If staff cuts are being made to save money a non-playing big earner must be first. Though he can leave a list of files and cabinets that the administrator mustn't look at. Whatever happens he will still be wandering down there every day with a briefcase and sandwiches, refusing to accept that he's been sacked and that he doesn't actually work there anymore. He lives in the magical Storrie World, a bit like the real one but you can change facts by saying the opposite, and no one ever wants their money back.

Storrie believes that if he says something enough times it becomes the truth. They told us they had not been served a winding up order, there would be no firesale, he told us there was new investment, that talk of financial problems was media lies, he said that the Prem had offered Pompey their own transfer window, he said there were several consortiums in a bidding war, he told us they had agreed a deal, he announced that it would solve the club's problems, he's now telling us they will go into administration on Friday... Does he actually mean that they will ask the court to swap the winding-up for adminstration? Does he mean that Chainrai is going to prove that he now doesn't claim to be the owner as he did last week but is now classing himself as a secured creditor? And will they actually do this or just talk about it? There's a pattern of Storrie appointing himself the boss of everyone and telling people what's going to happen in Storrie World - but the taxman and the court are deafeningly silent, keeping their powder dry perhaps? I would like to hear information from someone involved other than Portsmouth as I don't believe what they say. Though the taxman may still be too busy - digging the graves.

it's going to take the administrator ages to make sense of the chaos, especially if Storrie stays on to 'help''. What will they have left to sell and for how much? So the one attraction at the moment is the Sky money, if the Prem plunders future tv revenue to clear the debts there's nothing else to buy. The problems of tax and football debts are still there, as others have said this move, if accepted by the court, just shafts the locals. We have only had the club version of events thus far so let's see what the court and taxman make of it....that aside..... Football debts - Sol will be fine, even things like Avram's back pay now need to be sorted before they can play next season, and though the Muntari money is outside of the regs, uefa will go ape if they don't sort it. I assume the administrator will consider money more use than points so I see them taking points penalties and clearing the minimum tax debt they can get away with. 2010/11 - guess-timates! New running costs per month for a much reduced squad etc - £1M? Monthly income - £500K? TV money - used to clear old football debt - £0 so we have for sale A lightweight-squad championship club with no assets, and likely to lose £6M a year, for £35M (tax and football)? A lightweight-squad championship club with a huge points penalty, no assets, losing £6M a year - yours for £20M (football debt and a dash of tax)? A lightweight-squad championship club with a huge points penalty, no assets, losing £10M a year - yours for £15M (football debt and a dash of tax re-structured)? The third scenario pricing makes it look more attractive to keen local investors. But for £25M, in a year you will have a league one side with no assets. By the time you have gone through £35M you may have stabilised the club in the third tier and if you find the investor that has thus far eluded them, you could be ready to pay another £30M for the surrounding land and buy the ground back. You can then build the new stadium and increase revenues. By this point you will have paid out £175M for a league one team that can challenge for promotion to the championship. If it makes it to the Prem and you can stay up with your youth team squad it should only take about ten years to get into profit, then it'll be a little goldmine! That's without considering financial irregularities, tax evasion, trading insolvently etc. What a bargain.

could I hazard a guess that the club is talking crap again and that the court and the taxman may have a different view of how things move forward? And I recall what a world of plenty we found admin to be, so many offers, so much positivity, happy days...... Either way, by pledging his support and no money, Chanrai has today guaranteed the future of this thread. Poor old Phil, they pull this stunt while he's getting his beauty sleep! He's gonna go keyboard crazy when he catches up....so many ways they can implode, where to start?? The number of postings here will pass their average attendance before they can get into admin!

"Moving to playing somewhere else, building another stadium is one option. "Everyone agrees the stadium is too small." Errr, what stadium Mr C? There isn't one in the deal, they don't own it anymore so that's your first problem solved! How come everyone on this thread bar a couple of deluded lunatics have been able to see this coming from afar yet Storrie and the gang are still giving medical treatment to a corpse? I'm no financial wizard but huge overheads + small income has always equalled big trouble, are they a little dim? And on a general note - some great analysis on here - we should set up a panel to rescue businesses before they see problems coming, and offer them satire and abuse to help them through.

so we have moved today from 'an agreement in place and just proof of funding required to complete...' TO three desperate meetings with anyone who will listen? Storrie's pitch - 'in the next six days you have to wave goodbye to £15M, then if the court decides we haven't broken the law, which we so obviously have, and allows us to continue trading, we can address the other £45M of debt next month. And for your £60M you get to own....wait for it....90% of the club name!'

with that Fahim resignation he definitely just boarded the last ice cream van out of Saigon - he's already preparing his defence for when it goes to court, he isn't as dumb as he made out. Kept his options open by obtaining 10% with no outlay, got to see a few games, had a few nice dinners, did a bit of a land deal with the child-maimer, and now looks like the hero who has given the club back to the fans in the face of corruption that he wouldn't support. Nicely done. Surely the fat lass is finally wandering out onto the stage, but after six months of throat clearing she ain't gonna sound too clever.....

Al Fahim grabs the last lifejacket and sprints off the deck with banknotes fluttering out of his rucksack? Too late to avoid charges methinks. As they appear to have lost their homeground are they now the only Prem team classed as part of the travelling community?

they should be looking at Burnley, Hull and Wolves as their targets. The biggest problem will be that they need all three to drop points every week and at some point two of those three will play each other, the victor of that basement battle could emerge 10-11 pts above Pompey - a massive ask, even though 36points might be enough as the Prem is so poor. It would be an astonishing feat to stay up, it would be equally amazing to avoid financial collapse. One miracle a season? Maybe, but two?....

having suffered a week of abuse and the old jokes about Pompey 'washing scum out of cups' I just asked the latest texter, who was VERY quiet yesterday, what farmer Tony Martin and the taxman have in common. Was that harsh?.... I welcome banter from sensible people but for me anyone who uses the term scummer to me qualifies as an inbred, cross-eyed, sister-bothering, deluded, mot-free, heather-selling, scrap-metal-collecting, churchroof-stripping, granny-swindling, toothless, untaxed van owning, soon to be, former football fan.

Ive only been away half a day and the clumsy simpletons have managed to lose their ground! They're lucky that the nice man has taken it off their hands, off the list of assets they were trying to sell, and tied it up nicely against his own little property portfolio. So how can some Pompey fans think this could be a good thing? It looks like a disastrous 'development' to me.

it seems that the revenue have been very clever - they have been wise to Storrie from day one and have ushered him and the business to exactly where they want them. The real fans may rue the day that their club arrogantly took on the taxman and the court at poker. Sadly for them Storrie only has Mr Bun the baker and Master Crook the son of the arms dealer in his hand.

another deadline passes but still no news on Essex Beer Ltd? Did they have any success with their campaign to alter european legislation and restructure the UK licensing laws on the same day? We need to help them, it wasn't their fault the price of hops soared, and what will become of the 600 bar staff in their two pubs?... Maybe other brewers could refinance them, it's the least they should do for a competitor who has fallen on hard times, it is everyone else's fault after all. I mainly blame the Barking Gazette. If a company as good as that gets liquidated it'll just leave a bad taste in the mouth.

This is all about stalling for time until the next Sky money comes in - an appeal here, spin there, vague negotiations, due diligence, delay the case, next 48 hours, see what happens Friday..... I would be astonished as I can't see how it could be possible in a fair competition but if PL grant a transfer period - Pompey would bring in £2-3M? but continue to strengthen their squad with a few more players magically 'freed' from their existing contracts elsewhere whacking their overheads up again. The £2M will only go to the big two creditors or to pay clubs for these style of 'non-transfers' they are currently favouring, while the local builder/web provider can whistle and the taxman would be left stitched up awaiting the Sky cash. And against the debts the amount raised by transfers would be like their first seven games - pointless. If they were ever serious about trading legally or being accepted as a proper club rather than a bunch of criminals, they needed to clear the entire squad, the senior management needed to take pay cuts or to leave, give the players away, do deals to clear long contracts, and play on with a youth squad (shexy football!). That would galvanise the support, they would still go down, but there would be some pride and honesty. But to quibble over £100K on a £3M deal that also reduces your wage bill when you can't find £35 to pay a local supplier? Insane and insulting. They have abused every chance they have been granted, this will be no different, but the court will ignore the pr and deal with the historical information put before them. The only answer is for some lunatic to put a HUGE amount of money on the table, no talk, just cash. Nowt else works, tis the only way forward. And if the new South African can help himself by suggesting there is a keen buyer, he can push the court to put them in administration rather than winding up, thus giving him a bargain pick over the rotting corpse next month. Everyone has their own agenda. But we worked that out between us six months ago.

Saintbletch has it right on the cheating issue and I think Dronski sums it up well too. There are other threads on this forum where you see some moronic comments but this thread has evolved in the main into a cultured, investigative, satirical look at the obvious mismanagement and suicidal strategy of Portsmouth FC. It was funny at first, it then became hilarious with twists and turns beyond our imagination. We have a couple of favoured skates who we welcome because they contribute constructively, the arrogant gobby ones have become less frequest visitors, though they still pop up occasionally to peddle rubbish between sister-fiddling sessions. I can't be bothered to register on the other side but when I have seen comments from links there's an impression of thumbless simpletons blindly following whatever spin they are spun. This thread has been ahead of the game all the way, there have been conspiracy theories but also facts, the rest of the few would have done well to have someone read it to them so they could understand what has happened. As far as 'takeover' news goes, I come here first if I want an update from anywhere in the world, shrewd media will be tracking what goes on here. I look forward to the thread book launch and social event one day.

Missing items from Storrie's dictionary - Transfer window - a window in which normal clubs do transfers, a useful tool for those who need to sell. Criminal - someone who launders arms money, steals from transfer deals, and trades insolvent whilst simultaneously trousering cash. Debt repayment - a scheme that allows you to address debts, favoured by people who want to stay out of prison. Friend – someone who preferably doesn’t maim children with landmines and isn’t wanted for selling arms illegally to African dictatorships. Liar - someone who misleads fans, spins untruth through the media, misleads the taxman, treats the court system with disdain. Tanya - prison slang for someone who could put you behind bars if she gets offered a deal. Scary – a Russian mafia debt collector firebombing your car at 2am as a warning. Not scary – someone waving a tenner at you. Inevitable - an event that cannot be avoided however much you pretend that everything is fine. Poker – a game of chance where people with nothing in their hand try and bluff their way to make money, also a type of massage performed on industrial estates, mainly by lonely truckers. Ford - a struggling car giant, also a cushy holiday resort in West Sussex for low risk convicts, and people who had nothing in their hands, see poker. Liquidation – an unfortunate by-product of a land deal that should set you up for life. Ethics – the county where Harry buried the bodies after the West Ham blag. Check out the league pyramid and sing along to that familiar tune – 'They’re on the way to Zamaretto!'

They chose not to sell or to address debt last month, opting instead to cheat as many points and cup victories as possible with their illegally-assembled squad. It was a poor business decision, it looks to have predictably backfired. Cheats - no sympathy from me, nor from their fellow strugglers who they outbid or who have had to sell to balance books. And on the mob rumours - they have been swimming with sharks for a while, they got bitten, once again it was predictable. A pattern of poor/criminal decision-making is forming....and it continues with the call to eyeball the judge, take on extra wages, and test the patience of the taxman. It's a suicidal strategy - the club should book a flight to Zurich, or invite a local BBC reporter round and tell him they feel a bit down.

has the sleeping giant been smothered today? have we finally got it to flush? can there be another club in the British game associated with so many criminals? Send your answers on a postcard to Peter Storrie so he can alter it, in fact don't send it, wave it in his face, he likes that - no, not you Avram, don't wave that in his face.

It must be time for a final rousing speech from Storrie anytime now - new owner completing as we speak, fresh investment, stability, the way forward, freedom, the children are our future, passion, fight, democracy, the hand of history on his shoulder, nasty press, horrible taxman etc. If this is dragged out until the 1st, the court will have a better idea of the future funding required than a new owner would, so when a new consortium comes in they will be asked how much they have put on the table and the answer will be simple. If figure A doesn't match figure B......