the stain

Changed my mind. It's... What's Going On, by 4 Non Blondes.

I paid my 5 quid. I'm not leaving without a fight.

Whay can't I do anything about the aspect ratio? Everything is really tall and thin.

Better than Bum Gravy? I think not.

Lose any remembrance of those you love, then lose control of your bladder.

I agree with Saint Martini. Playing Joe Cole on the left is madness because a) he doesn't work well with Cashley, and b) he's our only decent creative player and should play just off the striker(s), not be exiled to the wing. Having said that, I won't be watching as I'll be too busy playing with my willy.

What is it then? And I don't just mean pop crap that got under your skin for the 5 minutes it was in the charts. I mean enduringly terrible hokum. Maybe it's just my opinion, but I think a bad song that takes itself seriously is infinitely worse than any throwaway faff could ever be. For me it's a choice between: Hotel California - The Eagles American Pie - Don McLean Walking in Memphis - Marc Cohn Actually, looking at those I've seen a connection I never noticed before...

I heard the quote and it sounded like what it quite clearly was; a tongue in cheek remark designed to wind up the hard of thinking and take the p1ss out of knee-jerk nationalism. It seems to have worked very well. He's got a boring voice, but he's a superb tennis player and last night's closing sets were great to watch. Here's hoping for another great match tonight.

Several different people? God? Thatcher?

On a busy Saturday night... - 3 or more people crowding round the bar when only one is ordering the drinks - remaining propped against the bar to drink while massive queues build behind you - ordering a massive round, only to take a chance on a debit card that 'may not work'. Go to the ****ing cash point!

Sweet merciful heavens...

If pushed I'd say Celtic, because I like a team that plays in green. When I lived in Edinburgh I 'supported' (looked out for the scores of) Hibs for the same reason. In actual fact though, when I lived in Scotland I couldn't believe how much worse their football was than our own and resented the fact they didn't show the Premiership, meaning I missed Saints tonking ManUre amongst many other highlights.

I live in Stanmore, Winchester and I suppose my local is The Stanmore Hotel. Not been in there for years though, it used to be horrible, like drinking in a dark conservatory full of triffids. Tend to drink in The Eclipse, in the centre of town. A bit pricey, but has olde worlde charm and they know how to keep their ales. Always good for a pint of Old Thumper and a random conversation. When I lived in Southampton my local was the South Western Arms, which was bloody fantastic.

Only if he's prepared to work for nowt, I'd suggest.

And if he takes West Ham down, he can say it's not his fault as he came in mid-season...

You've been two-timing Busted, or he has? Poor lambs'll be devastated either way.

Yes, we did.. I mean yes, it is. Damn.

I only went there to watch posh boys wrestling in the mud... oh.

It must have been one of those all too frequent dreams I have about obscure sporting encounters played between top public schools, featuring the heir to the throne. What can they mean?

I think Lowe has been trying for a long time to implement this kind of streamlined set-up, but has previously buckled to short-termist pressure (see the appointment of Redknapp). However, I don't think we'll see any change before the end of the season simply because we can't afford it. Unfortunately though, I can quite easily see the fans getting on the back of players and management. I sometimes wish that people would think less in terms of 'rights and more in terms of 'responsibilities', but hey, I'm not looking for an argument either.

But they play it against Eton. I watched it happen. Either they must be playing the same rules or that explains why I couldn't understand it.

Perhaps in the same sense as Golf Professional; a man paid to teach the game. Winchester College tend not to use the word 'teacher' if they can avoid it. Winchester have this crazy football/rugby hybrid game, which only they and Eton seem to play. I went to watch it once, apparently Prince William was playing, although the mud made it impossible to tell. Utterly incomprehensible and I never did find out who'd won. I should imagine they'd turn out a host of professionals at that should there ever be a market...

Why? I reckon it's one of the many charming idiosyncrasies of English-invented sports that give them the edge over more regimented games like American Football.

I'm going to disregard your opinions based on your awful quoting technique (Have you seen Atomised? I read the book and am hoping the film will match it for reactionary kicks)

I got 'accommodation' wrong. 19/20 p.s. Just basic English really...