Redbul

Virtuous

Oh dear....um..... Ah, compass.... [phew....]

Electric fence? Cats out, kids in. Everyone's a winner.

Syrup

Topiary

And there was me thinking the revolving door policy had gone with Lowe....

Telstar Ponies; Side Netting Off the album In The Space Of A Few Minutes

Hot

Richard the Third

Playa de las Americas

The Jim Jones Revue Here to Save Your Soul

Lake [From the film Friday the 13th, Camp Crystal Lake....where Jason was the killer? Sorry....]

Argonaut

Con

Ego

F***, you've got my vote!!!!

Doctor [sorry]

Got an iPhone 4 as I was at the end of my old contract and could get a new phone. No sheep mentality for me, just liked the feel of the Apple and the fact that it's got a 5 mega pixel camera. I've had absolutely none of the reported reception problems; it's certainly got a better reception than my old phone (which was an LG). So, I'm happy.

Granny

From the Profanisaurus: Lower Decking n. The act of deliberately not flushing away a dreadnaught in one's works toilets, then hiding in the next cubicle to savour the next occupants reaction.

One of my 'jobs' when I was little was to get up before my Mum and Dad to put the kettle on and turn the old valve radio on so that both would have been ready for tea and listening to when they got up. Well, of course, we had it tough. We used to 'ave to get up out of shoebox in the middle of the night and lick the road clean with our tongues. We had two bits of cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a day at mill for sixpence every four years, and when we got home our Dad would slice us in two wit' bread knife. Etc. etc.

That's a load of crap.

Curry

Woman says to her husband "You only want sex after you've been drinking...." "That's not true!" he says, "Sometimes I want a kebab....."

Pavlova