Redbul

Room

Captain's

Gangrene Eeooh, sorry....

Scab

Sally

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/8052889/Ordnance-Survey-lists-nicknames-for-British-places.html From Auld Reekie to Spaghetti Junction, the weird and wonderful nicknames given to towns, streets and buildings across Britain are being compiled into an "alternative gazeteer". Shirley High Street's nickname has made it....as has Eastleigh's. Not sure how the locals will take it going national though!!

Yep, sorry, that's the fellah I saw....turns out he got a broken collar bone. Cycling away after the game and got hit by a motor. In the Echo tonight. Note to self: Get to know town localities better....

Hayley McQueen

Whoever said women can multitask is talking b0ll0cks. I told my missus to sit down and shut the f*** up, she couldn't do either!!

You're havin' a giraffe!!!! The pavements in this town are worse than the roads!!!! I'd love it if the utilities ripped up our pavements; loose earth and mud would be marginally flatter than the pavements!!! Anyway, back on topic....

Hernia (I know, not strictly the same thing....)

Tbf, this was going on back at the Dell in the Prem. It's quite subtle. To come off the bench and be met with resounding shout of "Who?" from all around the stadium at the mention of your name has to be quite demoralising and unsettling, especially at Fortress Dell.

No idea, but there was another nipper being looked after by a group of people around Cook Street/St Mary's Road junction, just before the subway to the East Street Centre... Best wishes to both.

Beans

That's 3!! If I've got to choose one and one only, at the moment it's Lallana. Subject to change at short notice though....Chamberlain could make a late charge....

That was more like it.... And Davies only went Route 1 once. Quality in every department. Guly looked comfortable up front and had some really good deft touches. Won't be long before we see him on Showboat on Soccer AM....

Props....

Gorgeous

Supply and demand.... I can't remember which club did it but I thought it was a pretty good idea; they based their ticket prices on their league position. The lower their position, demand would go down so the the ticket price dropped to try and maintain footfall through the turnstiles and conversely, increased the price if they got better and there was more demand.

I saw a mate this morning, he's only got 1 arm, bless him. I shouted, "Where are you off to?" "To change a light bulb." he said, "That's going to be awkward isn't it?" "Not really" he said, "I've still got the receipt, you sarcastic tw*t."

Walls

Saturday Night

Spaghetti. It's purple spaghetti after a cr*p ****gy dog story. Thanks, but I'll pass on the prize!!! Oh alright, slippers then.

Ali G

Land Rover 110 Defender TD5; plenty of room for passengers AND luggage. And people get out of your way! And if you do bump into something parts are dirt cheap and bolt on. Ditto above, run it on veg oil.