lettuce

You're just green with envy

Should I be concerned that you are having dreams about me?

Bought the new Carlos Tevez "Grestest Goals" DVD but it wouldn't play.

Would never happen to me... Sent from my data-roaming Smart phone while I'm on holiday

Flew to Germany on business for a single night stay, so I packed my clothes and wash kit in my hand luggage so I didn't need any hold luggage. Got to the security scanners and they confiscated a can of Lynx deodorant because it was over the size limit for "fluids" in hand luggage. Once I'd got through security I went into Boots in the terminal and bought another can of Lynx, the exact same size... it only occurred to me the next morning that this can was also going to be confiscated on my return journey so I unloaded most of the can on my pits, chucked it in the bin and smelt fiiiiiiine all day! What an exciting story that was... rock and indeed roll...

My mum once asked me if she need to rewind a DVD before she took it back to Blockbuster...

Having been born and bred half way between Liverpool and Manchester, I always preferred Liverpool as a place to visit. There's nothing I particularly dislike about Manchester, just always felt that Liverpool has more character/identity to it. Still, you could easily commute between the two. There are some nice suburbs of Manchester - me and the Mrs very nearly ended up moving there for work a couple of years ago so we spent a fair bit of time sussing out the areas around Altrincham and Timperley (Frank Sidebottom RIP) That said, I've spent the last 13 years living just south of Birmingham and I much prefer it to either Manchester or Liverpool - it doesn't have the "coolness" or "charisma" of Manchester or Liverpool, it just quietly goes about its business of being a KICK-ASS CITY! UP THE BRUM!

I don't see why anyone should have to justify their beliefs about ghosts (or anything else for that matter) to some random Doctor Spock-wannabe internet warrior... However, in the interests of forum comedy, please continue.

Steelers are probably worth a punt (pun intended!) at 14/1

Yep, I'll be tuning in. Expect my beloved Seahawks to plod through the season as usual... however, there's a reasonable chance of them repeating last season's achievement of becoming the first team in NFL history to win their division with a losing record... yay, go Seahawks!

Had you parked in a corner?

Are opposition players allowed to shout "AWAY!" or "MAN ON!" when there is actually nobody near the player in possesion? Or is that also classed as obstruction? How about if a player shouts the name of an opposition player, rather than shouting "MINE!" in order to fool an opposition player into leaving the ball for them? Or what about if 2 players on opposing teams have the same name? Are they not allowed to shout their own name for fear of being penalised for confusing the opposition? Just thinking of ways to gain a slight competitive advantage via devious means!

Not yours?

They might be Pardew's PLAYERS, but it's Adkins' TEAM... (plus, Pardew never had a bus, which was clearly the missing ingredient)

All fart and no sh1te

I recall (from a similar dispute I was involved in a few years back) that Trading Standards assume a period of 5 years as "reasonable" time for electronic consumer goods to be expected to function. One point which might affect this particular scenario is whether or not the electronic goods can still "function" even with the damage they have developed - i.e. can the camera still take photographs/video and can all functions be used despite the faulty screen.

Jimmy Saville got stuck in a time-machine... now then, now then, now then...

Also, sometimes if you switch from an international flight to a domestic (internal) flight, you have to check your luggage in again. I found this out on a trip to Sweden (Birmingham -> Stockholm -> Lulea) a few years ago. I'd been tipped off about this in advance by a work colleague so I asked about it at the check-in desk in Birmingham but was told my luggage would go all the way through to my final destination. Once I got off the plane at Stockholm, I was wandering through the terminal on my way to my connecting flight when I noticed my suitcase on a carousel! Quickly grabbed it, ran like the clappers and got in the queue to check it back in! Just about made it to my flight on time... which was over-booked and they had no seat for me by the time I arrived! Don't know if this is the case (pardon the pun) in any other countries.

Lock this thread??? It's one of the few threads on TSW that has remained broadly on topic, hasn't descended into personal insults, contains no trolling and in which people have given differing views of the topic without being shot down in flames... finally a subject which has encouraged civilised debate!

That's exactly what I thought when I first discovered there were "sitters" out there! As for standing access, clasp the paper in one hand and a buttock in the other to provide adequate space to maouevre. For sitting, I would have thought either approach ("between the legs", "around the back" or even your suggestion of "in through the side") would obscure visibility of the "used paper" required to assess if the task is not yet complete? No such problems with the standing approach, which affords vivid, unobscured views of your handywork. Certainly a candidate for "golden threads"

No way! It wasn't until a couple of years ago when a mate in the pub asked the question "sit or stand to wipe" that I realised there was a choice! I've always been a "stander", as are 4 out of the 5 mates who answered the question (the only "sitter" was the mate who asked the question) How does "sitting to wipe" work?... Do you pop your hand between your legs or do you slide forward on the seat to allow access for the rear?

Give a man a fish and he can feed his family for a day... teach him how to fish and his family won't see him all weekend! It's so cold, I've got nips like pigmies' d1cks!

Embedded software developer in the automotive industry. Mainly involved in software development for electronic power steering and braking systems for luxury/prestige vehicle manufacturers... the sorts of cars I'm never likely to own myself

Looks like the Spurs keeper...Gomez?

Collecting/playing "retro" computer/video games (been toning it down in recent years, kind of reached a critical mass!) Astronomy and reading/collecting books about NASA, the space race, Apollo moon landings, etc. 5-a-side football Darts Horse riding (started learning about 18 months ago, best decision I've made in years!) NFL (Go Seahawks!) Wife (in spite of all of the above, I'm married!)