Guan 2.0

Ha! Just confirms what I've been told for years. I don't know if he waived his 'loyalty' bonus (last update I had on Friday indicated he hadn't), but even if he had, what would that change? Still been an ego-driven disloyal tool. As I said, the club are not happy with him,and that's reflected in the coverage. Maybe a little nicer tomorrow, but only a little! Christ, even though Shaw got a bollocking for the twitter SNAFU, everybody at the club agreed it's because he's a bit dense, rather than malicious. Oh, and if anybody is wondering why Lallana was subbed so much/declared a non-target by Poch, one reason amongst many was his refusal to play the positions and channels that he was required to, even after video highlights proved this was his most effective role in proving goals (he had 1 assist in 18 games at this time). He paid no attention at his end of season review. If you go back through my posts you will see I tried to allude to this at the time (as much as possible). The worst thing is knowing that if he scores, he won't give a **** and will just start jacking off into the crowd. Steve, can we suspend the swear filter on this thread please?

Ha ha, can you break records with 'Undisclosed fee'? Early signing may announce fees to reassure fans, later ones will be hush hush.

We do need to wait and see how the new signings and manager work out, but this isn't the bad old days. People keep on mentioning Dixon and Speedie, but how about the Magnificent six in return for Davies. A spent Mark Hughes, A crippled David Howells and Mark 'KINGS FUKIN LYNN' Paul were my highlights. In answer to the bear: Some from abroad, some from within these isles (not necessarily England) Some were picked for the world cup. Only one is uncapped. Is under 28 young? One has a kind of young Sean Bean ruggedness about him.

When i was told about the Lallana and Shaw situations, I was reassured by who we are lining up to replace them. Btw no-one from either club was supposed to talk about the Shaw transfer until it was done. Which is why i couldn't say anything, and Luke had to do some hasty editing! Lovren is the only player I'm worried about. I've heard who we are lining up if DL goes, and I'm not sure they would come. I hope I'm wrong, and RK has some influence i don't know about. In other news, K.Billy's source tells him that we have a new GK and GK coach lined up.

It's a measure of how far we've come where 10 million is just the first phase of spending, and not necessarily the biggest single amount we will spend on a transfer. ....And that is really all i can say without getting cut off. Else wise, i'm not likely to have enough info for a smiley!

Regrets I still can't say anything. Even though the press can!

I asked if we would spend more than 35 million this summer without sales."No" was the answer.

No.

Luke Shaw Balls: Manchester United Target In Incestuous Playboy Three-Way Text Show ONCE upon a time the News of the World did the entertaining kiss ‘n’ tells. Then the paper was put to sleep and replaced with the ****poor Sun on Sunday. In place of extra-marital ****gings readers now get stories of teenagers flirting. “England Ace Luke” is Southampton’s 18-year-old Luke Shaw, who could soon be on his way to Manchester United. The story runs: THREE Lions wonderkid Luke Shaw pleaded for a threesome with a Playboy beauty and her twin sister — just hours before England’s World Cup exit. Shaw, 18, texted Carla Howe from his team’s Rio hotel at 3am on Friday — having earlier sent photos of himself. So wonderful is Shaw that he played precisely zero minutes for a flat-footed England team at the World Cup. Carla Howe is one-half of the Sun’s go-to twins for tales of strumpetry. The Sun loves the sibling glamour models (photos), linking them in print to Manchester United’s Patrice Evra, Olympic gymnast Louis Smith, Pass-Notes Revolutionary Russell Band, nodding TV pro-am singer and Dr Sues-inspired will.i.am and Chelsea footballer Ashley Cole (natch.). Now the Sun reports: Carla, 23, said: “When he asked for a threesome I was disgusted.” Where’s the ambition, dammit! A foursome… A fivesome…. How about asking for a octosum? C’mon Luke. Up your game. And you can start with working out how to send a “saucy” text. Get his pocket rocket from young Luke: She wrote at 3am on Friday: “Shame England lost,” and he replied from the team hotel in Rio: “I know.” Oooou. Don’t stop. Keep talking, you dirty sod… Nearly there…. Carla then sent a selfie in which Melissa also appeared… Shaw wrote: “That your sister?” Carla replied: “She’s in the background. Lol.” Shaw then asked: “When we having a threesome?” Carla replied: “Lol. Eww I don’t share my sis. Gross.” Shaw said: “Ow just the two of us then.” The Sun adds: Their chat goes against the high standards expected of England players by coach Roy Hodgson. That’s what happens when you leave John Terry, the aforesaid Cole and Rio Ferdinand at home and have only Wayne Rooney in the party. Standards slip. Last night Carla said of her chats with Shaw: “I liked him to begin with. He had a good sense of humour in his messages. He told me he was single and I started thinking he was serious about coming to Los Angeles for a date. But it was soon pretty obvious to me that he was intrigued about Playboy because so many of his messages were about what went on at the mansion. “I ended up realising he was actually obsessed with it… Shaw then showed his interest in the Playboy mansion, asking Carla: “Can I come and meet some of the girls?” She replied: “They literally don’t let any guys come up here ever.” He then said: “You must have had a guy up there?” She responded: “No it’s mega strict.” He wrote: “Lool. What are you and the girls doing then?” We’ve no idea. But if you want to find out what (allegedly) goes on at the Hugh Hefner’s place, you can read this NSFW story, which is a lot racier than anything you can read in the limp Sun on Sunday.

I started filling in the survey, but then got scared that it was trying to give me a virus and turn me into an Iphone. So I panicked and filled in every box with 'Oren the Saints go marching in'. Hope that helps.

It has to be built in, to replace the current POS....

Btw anybody who would like to help me can do so here! http://www.saintsweb.co.uk/showthread.php?50615-Oven#.U6IOxPldWSo

As it says.

Ooh. Interesting. The exact words given to me were that 'Ralph has been scaled back'. Maybe he's unhappy with his new re-jigged position? (I can't check on that until Mon, btw). On another note, yes I did mean that my contact told me Koeman loved the training ground, a day before his declared 'first visit'. But that I accidentally gave them an out with my follow up question, unlike Colombo.

Whoo! **** the police! Break a pencil! The man won't keep us down etc. So in before the lock.... Lovren, two inquires. Number has been bandied, but no official bid. Both from abroad. The club want to keep Lovren, but if he goes, would rather it was not to go to a direct rival. Shaw, still can't talk about. Sorry. Interesting that Koeman was said to have loved the training ground from the moment he laid eyes on this. Instead of doing a Columbo and pointing out that the timescales don't add up, I instead asked today whether they meant by email. Gave them an out. Koeman soon to start talks with all players who are away, not just those who want away. He also has a '****load' of player DVD's to watch, and our own matches! As everyone may have noticed, Kreuger has been scaled back, Reed given more camera training and prominence. 'Im just the Canadian hockey guy' was only a half joking admission, group meetings are thankfully back, and things are far less tense. Club slightly worried about empty seats opening day and perception upon the new appointment - looking at ways to improve season ticket sales. KL hoping that people will now take her at her word she is here for the long haul! But she knows that may depend on how many goals the new striker scores Lallana a thorny issue. The club will effectively be building bridges with a player who has gone outside the club to demand a move, but not handed in a transfer request. , also reported comments in brazil. Difficult to justify this against club discipline in the recent past, Osvaldo, Ramirez, Puncheon etc. Club feel that they have done nothing wrong, and that they will have a hard time justifying positive PR to other players, Koeman will speak to them before making decision on captaincy. Also cortese is not leaking (obvs). Club hope that desire to speak to new men and the club looking forward will help stop Tabloid Journos looking for bad news stories, even if it is just linking us with every player looking for a raise!

Will it work?

After the the match is over!

Saint have received enquiries from two foreign clubs for Lovren, and one has 'given a number' (not a formal bid). More to follow later.

Full update Tues night.

--

I'm not so sure

Yep! One of them anyway. Will confirm on monday if it's not done and dusted by then.

Speaking to my contact Monday, if the full story hasn't broken by then i will post what i find out (as much as i am allowed).

Just wondering if the club will get their way and manage to appoint by Thursday afternoon. Otherwise, it may become an open secret while they wait for a slow news day during the world cup.

It's so easy! Get a model with a timer. If the cooking time is 7 mins, put the timer on for 5, the residual heat will complete the job. No mess, no fuss.