pap

A Football Weekly podder reckons this could be Diego Costa's watershed moment, and like Luis Suarez, would have legitimate calls go against him because of prior simulation or aggression. I'm surprised it has taken this long. He's wound people up and got into argy-bargy all season.

I've been reading the Comments section on the Maureen Lipman article all week. The whole thing left me with the impression of Winston Smith at his most compliant on an Adderall binge. My comment survived Winston's wrath.

Violent conduct. Could this give Chelsea the wobble they so desperately need, or are they covered?

I don't know why you don't work from home. In fact, I think you should work from home. As forum buddy, I have invented a specialised Project Manager keyboard to streamline your teleworking efforts:-

Impossible to prove, and I wouldn't suggest that you try unless you fancy being on the sex offender's register.

The man has edited it. I'm fairly sure that means he doesn't want it repeated. Look lively, Unbelievable Jeff. If you think this is bad, you should try tracking comments in the Guardian's news section.

The main difference there is you can vote with your wallet. Unbelievable Jeff is unbelievably fúcked on that score. I think he should give up the Project Management and live a pastoral existence in Somerset.

I'm sad enough to have remembered what was originally there. Uncharacteristically poor choice of words from shurlock that could easily have been misinterpreted

This. Taking consequential to ridiculous levels, say I had a hungry lion living in my house instead of a child. Said hungry lion goes apeshít at around 18:30 each night. If the train is late, I know that my sofa is going to get eaten and shát out by the lion before I get back. Should South West Trains compensate me for my sofa if that ever happens? Or will people just say, "hah, pap you díck. Why on earth do you commute into London when you've a hungry lion living in your house? Didn't you make arrangements for you ever being late?"

Meow, darling, meow (been on the shandy, mush?)

I think this shades it. proto-Grandpappy has spoken.

Shame. I'm not expecting grandkids for many a moon, but when the day comes, I'll be all over that grandparentin' shít. Babies have never really bothered me. I've had two of my own, been through some difficult issues at times, and know how to handle them. Most of the time, they're a piece of píss, especially if there's good structure there already, such as regular bedtimes and such. They're normally in bed early doors anyway. They generally get more interesting as they get older. Mostly though, I see the respect my own grandad gets in his role as head of the family, even though he can be a cantankerous old bastard at times. Huge responsibility, even though it gets largely ceremonial as you all get older and your kids rightfully work their own stuff out. I can wait - I'd much prefer that the wave of progeny hits after both the girls have established themselves in this world, but I'd lie if I said I wasn't looking forward to it.

Important to spend time with the missus alone and remember what made you get together in the first place. Very difficult to do with kids at that age.

An old buddy of mine always used to repeat the refrain "treat 'em mean and keep them keen". While as far as I know, he has always been single, it's not bad advice. People want what they can't have, and what most women actually have is a man that doesn't actually do what they want. Don't do what they want! It's a recipe for disaster. You'll be broken, friendless and out in the garden cleaning up six months accumulation of Shih-Tzu poo. The same goes for Valentine's Day. FFS, don't treat is as a yearly thing. Once a decade is more than enough. They don't even complain about the garage-bought flowers at that frequency. If you DO engage in Valentine's Day as a yearly spectacle, I can't help you. You're already gone.

He's Dutch. Emperor Ron is Dutch. They all know each other from Heineken and Edam parties.

I've had different mileage with different chargers on my Tab S. The official one is sound. Keeps a charge all day. Some of the others I've used have charged it quickly, but it has lost charge very quickly afterwards. The only issue I've got with Samsung is that they prioritise their phones for OS upgrades. Tablets follow long after, which means the HTC M8 (phone) is rocking Android 5.0 while the Tab S isn't

Nice, bTripz, nice. Seeing as you're the expert and all, can you tell me how the fúck I get an NCHAR value from Oracle to SQL server (via linked servers) without having to wrap the bastard in TO_CHAR? I know it's possible. I can pull from system views like ALL_TAB_COLUMNS without having to wrap NCHAR values. Every time we try it on one of our own tables, the data length is misreported and no-one seems to know what the jip is.

I'm using both at the minute. ERP integration project with Oracle on the big box end and SQL Server handling the intermediaries. First time I've been on Oracle since 1997/98. What a fúcking money pit that is, and it won't even let you do uncommitted reads. SQL Server allows dirty reads, done dirt cheap.

Is she dead? That tends to be a requirement for suicide.

Also, on a point of logic, how the fúck do they have a suicide bomber in custody?

Fascist scum

Jack's dad will be happy. Actually, he probably won't be.

Really chaps, this is one of those scenarios where if in doubt, leave it out. Your responses are sadly characteristic. No ability to look the issue in the eye when people are talking cover-up, kids being killed and the state being used to hide it from view. However, the minute RB turns up with a video, you're good to go. It's something you feel comfy having a go at. The superficial nature of the replies means that we find ourselves in the position Unbelievable Jeff is now on record as saying he f**king hates Russell Brand, but is seemingly unable to muster similar fury for lifelong sex offenders. I'm sure it's there, just omitted like, but going by the thread alone you'd score it Westminster Paedos 1 - 0 Russell Brand.

Good five minute interview with Matty. http://www.theguardian.com/football/video/2015/jan/29/matt-le-tissier-video-interview?CMP=twt_gu