Kadeem Hardison

I got drunk at a family wedding and had a threesome with my auntie and uncle.

Lol! What a great story! Keep them coming! I didn't think it could get better than the brilliant 'goth club' one, but you are one crazy man!

No. Just reinstate my main board status, thanks.

It's Stevie Wonder.

'Accepting', says the man who has banned me from the main board for no reason whatsoever.

So the private company got bailed out by us, the taxpayers? That doesn't make sense. They should have gone bust. That's what happens when you are a private company and you don't manage your business properly.

Correct. I remember when the Royal Bank of Scotland went bust because of their incompetence. Whatever happened to them?

Andy Murray is an excellent casing point. Maybe he could have been the solution to the BP oil disaster?

I can believe that there are so many incompetent teachers out there. I mean, you just have to look at the level of education displayed by the majority of posters on this thread to see that this country is full of thickos. Sack all the teachers and start again, that's what I say. Make dune Chief Headmaster for all schools and he can set the curriculum the way it needs to be, in order to make stand-up citizens like him. He can start with PE: Every day, 5 times a day, school children should be made to exercise their patellas in a quick lunging motion. This should be done until they are able to perform a patellar reflex with having to think about it all.

Bit different, given the high-scoring nature of rugby. I'd imagine that 95% of penalty tries would not affect the outcome of a game in Rugby. In football, it would be more like 95% WOULD affect the outcome. Possession is a completely different kettle of fish in rugby and football. It would be much easier to keep the ball having gone 1-0 in football than it would in rugby.

This isn't true. I'd like to work more hours. I don't want any extra pay though. You see, I work for Lord Duckhunter. I love working for him. I love to bathe in his glow. He motivates me to work 100% capacity ALL THE TIME. It is the great working conditions and charismatic boss that makes it so enjoyable.

As dune is a thicko who doesn't value education, I don't think we need to worry about his opinion really.

Is this all that concerns you? Do you really believe that you are beyond criticism? Heaven help you, Boj. This place has made a monster out of you.

WS makes a great point about Boj and Eddie being dweebs. I have seen the likes of them so many times in my life. They are so desperate to be accepted by the likes of Stu and 'the lads' that they allow them to get away with anything.* The thing that they don't realise is, the people that they are desperate to be accepted by still think they are knobheads, but Boj and Eddie don't see they are being taken for a ride. They think that they have been accepted by the people they didn't fit in with at school by having this site. Well, they haven't. WS is also right about heart and humour. Boj and Eddie seem to be under the impression that it takes computery whizzery to make a great site. It doesn't. It takes heart and humility and a sense of humour to make a great site. Something which they clearly lack in spades. They can't see when someone is using satire to make a serious point, which makes them a lot more stupid than they like to think they are. *(Stu gets a day's ban here and there when he posts something racist, I've been permanently banned from the mainboard for months because Eddie gets upset because he doesn't like any humour. In fact, that is a bit autistic, Eddie. Have you ever done the Baron-Cohen Autism test? I think you should as all the signs are there. Did you say you have been working on this site for 6 months?)

It is obvious to the majority (Baj and me) that Wiltshire Saint is on a wind-up. The rest of you (Ponty, Junction 9, buctootim, soppyoldsod, Doctoroncall, norwaysaint, Smirking_Saint and Deano6) are in the minority and should get over yourselves.

I actually genuinely find that people who insist someone is stalking them just add more evidence of their own solipsism. Ooh, a little empty white box on the internet... that must be for me to fill with my ideas...

Awesome advice Tim! I think that offensive players should have this drilled into them when taking free-shot. I think we might have won today if some of our players were more clued up on this. Also, when your players are taking a throw-on, make sure that they keep both their feet on the ground as this will only result in the throw being disallowed and given to the opposing team. And another good piece of advice: when you are kicking off, make sure that all of your team are behind the midfield stripe as advancing beyond it before the ball is kicked is not allowed.

GCSE English currently requires you to be able to retrieve and select the key points in a text. You'd clearly fail, as that article is saying that the examining board rejected DRAFT exam papers because they weren't rigorous enough for their standards. If anything, it is testament to the high difficulty level that they set that they are rejecting papers. You are really are quite a thicko. If you believe that they are easy, put your money where your mouth is. Name a subject, I'll find an example exam paper from one of the examining boards websites and you can sit it. I'll even trust you to time yourself and not to Google the answers. Then we can get a teacher on here to mark it. What do you say, dune? Any teachers want to volunteer to mark dune's A* response?

I couldn't get beyond all the comma splicing. I think you may have set a new world record.

I still stand by what I said about you stevegrant, in spite of the infraction for the above post. I think you've done a standup job.

I can't help but agree with the poster above. I think it is really easy to complain, but this isn't stevegrant's job to do this - all the time he puts into this is his own. And this site is available for free to everyone, and for a tiny fee if you want any extras. I don't begrudge stevegrant and Boj taking a bit of money for all the hard work that stevegrant puts in. Can we all think before we post things that are obviously mean and thoughtless. stevegrant has worked really hard at this, without any help at all from Boj or Ponty or the rest of the admin team, and we should give him the credit where it is due. Can you imagine getting in after a hard day's work to have to spend your evening putting together something as momentous as this, particularly whilst the rest of your so-called team sit around and take the credit for when things go well? No. (I can't see any of that admin team supporting stevegrant in the face of all these complaints, either.) So unless you lot can do any better (and seeing the attempts from some people over the years (the comedy site by SF76 aside) it's obvious you can't), shut up. Yes, the forum is different. But is it worse? No. The content of the forum is still the same (although I can't see the main board still)... whining, moaning, racism, homophobia, etc. Where else can you go these days to do these things without some PC, leftie, tree-hugger reporting you to Brussels? Nowhere. So just be thankful. Be thankful to stevegrant. stevegrant, I salute you. Well done.

With a lot of help from the Americans.

I watched a reality tv/documentary about an office a few years back which was really staged. The office manager, David, was mental and must have been told what to say/how to act. There was a gimp called Gareth too who was really weird. Must have been faked.

I don't know, I find the tragedy of the club not having a season ticket installment plan hilarious. Take a look at the main board if you don't believe me. If it weren't for the fact I sit around in my own p*ss and sh*t all day, every day whilst gimping around the internet, I would p*ss myself laughing.